Boys on the Radio
by BluntJoey
Summary: Harry and Draco both reach a peak in terrible times, forced into an unfair destiny, and through each other they learn that some love is not gay, straight, or bisexual. Some love just is. COMPLETE. Please Read and Review.
1. Chapter 1

**Boys on the Radio**

By Jordan "BluntJoey" Adorno

**Spoilers:** PS/SS, CoS, PoA, GoF, QTTA, FB. Written between Half-Blood Prince and Deathly Hallows.

**Genre:** Angst, Romance, Horror, Adventure

**Story Synopsis: **Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter are trapped and alone in painful destinies when they connect unknowingly through a radio show in the summer before Fifth Year. Bonding over the deadly weight on top both their shoulders, the boys unite on a desperate romantic but angst-filled road that sends them looking for comic relief and a reason to live. Soon enough the two realize some love isn't gay or straight...some love just is. But will it be enough once the unlikely pair learn that in order to survive, they may just have to save the whole world from Lord Voldemort!

**Author's Notes:** This story is canon right to GoF, and does not incorporate information from there on. Also, it's important to note that in THIS fic, Blaise Zabini is a GIRL, and her name is spelled '_Blaze_'. Also, take crucial note that ALL the featured lyrics at the opening of each chapter are from "Boys on the Radio", "Malibu", "Northern Star", "Reasons to be Beautiful", and other Hole songs; a couple extras are from solo songs by Hole's lead singer, Courtney Love, but regardless, ALL LYRICS FEATURED are by **Courtney Love**, both those from Hole and solo songs.

**Disclaimer:** This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.

**Chapter One Summary****:** In which Harry Potter has a lot to be upset about, Draco Malfoy does drugs, The Malfoys are such crackheads, The Weasleys are oblivious, and wizarding radio brings two unlikely people together.

* * *

Chapter One

___Oh the boys, on the radio,_

___They crash and burn,_

___They fold and fade so slow._

Harry sat alone in Ron's bedroom at the Burrow, resting. Being able to relax at this very moment was imperative to him. His fourth year at Hogwarts had certainly been anything but relaxing - and Harry was still completely suffering from the terrible trauma. He could still see Cedric's dead body every night in his worst dreams ...

He had spent a month at the Dursleys' dealing with it. Ron and Hermione had corresponded of course, but he terribly wished for, needed in fact, his best friends in the world at his side supporting him. Although this could have been easily arranged (and undoubtedly would've been too, as a matter of fact), Dumbledore was insistent that his aunt and uncle got their annual duration to torture Harry: the "concerned" Headmaster had forced Harry through yet another month of agony at the Dursleys', and why? 'He's got his reasons,' Mrs. Weasley had gently told him. But Harry was sick of being pushed around without explanation or concern for his own feelings, and felt anger toward Dumbledore. Harry, overly-prideful, considered his anger, unbelievable as it was, ___righteous_, even now, saved and totally safe at the Burrow, and why? A man Harry had always respected as wisest and most powerful now seemed, in his mind anyway, most memorable as a control freak.

But now he was at The Burrow and should be happy, right? After all, Hermione was coming the next day, which meant he would be with his best friends for the rest of the summer. But now that he got what he had wanted before, he much rather wished he was alone. He was scared. He knew Voldemort would seek him out again. He had been very angry that Harry had escaped ...

The Weasleys had gone to Diagon Alley and left a depressed Harry on the couch listening to wizarding radio. It was a bit soothing as he drank tea and cuddled in his blanket. Some type of radio show was starting. It was an advice show. People called in talking about love problems, rotten families, rotten jobs ... Not a soul knowing that they had a ___real_, much grander problem: Voldemort was back, and thanks to the Ministry's conspiracy, the truth was publicly irretrievable.

"My family expects something out of me I don't want to do," said a new voice, a male's. It sounded frightened yet strong; fearful yet brave. "Not doing it could destroy my life."

Harry knew how the boy felt. Harry was expected to save the world all in a day's work and be used as some sort of pawn. He was 'The Boy Who Lived' and all that.

"I've got no choice," the boy finally said. Harry could relate perfectly, obviously, as he was destined to face Voldemort. The boy's tone grew chilling as he timidly added, "I'll be killed ..."

"Merlin's beard! How old are you?" asked the radio announcer incredulously. Now that Harry thought of it, the voice ___was_ very young...

"Uh, fifteen since June," the boy responded uncomfortably.

___That sounds about right_, Harry thought to himself.

"Hogwarts, then?" the announcer asked casually.

Yet the boy was suspicious. "Um, maybe," the boy said in a mysterious tone. The boy was hiding a lot; he was probably in much danger. "I've been put in a life and death situation. I might run away."

"Any friends?" tried the host.

"None that aren't involved as well."

Harry decided he wanted to call in as well. He didn't have much else to do, and it could be potentially interesting. The Weasleys had recently adapted a wizarding phone in their home, so why not make use of it?

"We have another caller. You want to respond to this young man?"

"...Well, I have the same problem, mates. I'm being forced into a life I don't deserve. It could end up being the death of me." As Harry let out his frustration, he noticed he was coming off angrier than intended, but it was too late to care.

"That's how I feel! A written destiny which I shouldn't have to fulfill," said the boy exasperatedly. His words were the sound of someone depressed, unfortunately. For a moment, Harry swore he could recognize the voice...

"Sometimes we have to do what is right and not what is popular," said the interested announcer. "Hogwarts, too, caller #2?"

"Um ... perhaps," Harry answered distrustfully. He had forgotten until just now that the other boy had said he too might go to Hogwarts...Harry felt more intrigued with every moment passing.

"I wonder if you all know each other," the announcer wondered bitterly, a bit frustrated by all the non-revealing answers.

"I don't think I know him," Harry said truthfully. "It does seem like we'd get along, though."

Harry strongly wondered who this mystery boy was. He listened to the voice as carefully as he could, but Harry realized it was probably a disguise voice anyway.

"I just feel so ..." the boy began.

An uncomfortable silence passed for a second but felt like eternity for the both of them.

"...___Alone_," the two boys said at the same time. Their voices were equally wistful.

* * *

Over the next few weeks, Harry barely talked to anyone. Being himself, he thought he would be okay, but he wasn't. He was sick of everything. When the Weasleys and Hermione went out, Harry continued to call into that show, and so did the other boy. Harry kept listening to the voice.

"...So now it has been three weeks, everyday, with our two famous teenagers now has it not?" the announcer said one day, after some time.

"So it has," the other boy had responded dryly.

"Yeah," Harry managed to say, feeling uncertain. He was wondering where the announcer was taking this - was he bored and done with them?

"Nothing better to do at midday during a great summer, you two reckon?" The announcer did not sound mad, half-cheery if anything. His ratings were up because of these intriguing boys.

Both the boys again responded simultaneously. "___Nothing_."

The announcer had basically been allowing them to talk. Listeners seemed to be finding them more interesting by the day. Why, Harry didn't know. Why would anyone care about two teenagers full of angst? Either way, Harry did begin to really enjoy talking to the boy. He seemed quite interesting and mature. He wondered who it was and since they were the same age, he was in their year. There were only a handful of people it could be. But he really didn't know who to put it to.

It was finally only a couple days before term would start again.

"Will we see each other at school?" Harry dared to ask of the boy finally, rather boldly too. He had been scared to ask the question.

"I don't know," the boy admitted rather bluntly.

And that had been the end of that. So, for the last days of term he continued calling in, talking to the boy, becoming more and more interested. But he did not bring up meeting. If fate would allow it, they would. If not, then no ...

* * *

"...Harry! Are you listening to me?" It was the impatient voice of Hermione nagging his attention.

"Oh, sorry..." Harry had not been paying any attention.

"Hurry, we're going to be late for the train!" Hermione insisted. And Harry speedily got his things together. It was already September 1st, and they had to leave for school. He could not believe how much time he hadn't spent with his friends. He honestly wondered how time had flown, what everyone had been doing...

* * *

Draco Malfoy had not had a great summer. In fact, it had been terrible. It had been hell. Ever since Voldemort had returned, his life had turned into a terrible fate. His father wanted him to become a Death Eater by Christmas. And Voldemort wanted it too. And what choice did he have? Nowhere to run, nowhere to hide …

Draco had spent the summer in his room, only leaving when his parents made him to for meals or pointless talks. They didn't know it, but often late at night, Draco went to the Muggle village and smoked pot. Funnily, it was the only thing that kept him sane. The nightly high.

With no one to talk to, Draco had called into a radio program for advice. He had spent a lot of time, corresponding with some boy who went to Hogwarts in his year through the show. It had been another thing to get him through the summer, talking to him. He understood where Draco came from. He bled like him.

Draco supposed the nightmare, the ___true_ nightmare that was getting worse and worse, had really started when he'd been beaten by his father the moment he came home. And not in any normal way. His father had used the Cruciatus Curse of all on his own son for coming, once again, in second place in exams to the Mudblood, Hermione Granger. 'How dare you disgrace the Malfoy name!' And his father then enjoyably watched his son in pain. 'Good training for when you join us, son!' And that was when he first learned of his fate.

It made him hate Granger more. It really wasn't her fault. But the fact that she always had to come in first; always had to be perfect. It was because of her that he had been abused by his heartless father. In ways, he looked forward to going back to school. But in other ways, he did not. He had no one. And it just had to be on this thought that he boarded the Hogwarts Express as his mother bid him farewell, too.

Draco Malfoy was dying inside.

* * *

Harry had left to another compartment, losing Ron and Hermione once again. He knew now it would be obvious. He prayed the boy would call into the show today again. He would be. There were a few wizarding phones on the train. He had gotten so used it.

"I'm here," Harry said into the phone, his heart racing. The other boy was already on the line. Harry tried to be especially quiet as he noticed Draco Malfoy was nearby using another phone - probably calling his filthy Death Eater of a father.

"I'm glad to hear from you again," the other boy said breathlessly. Lately, the time was a conversation between the two, and the announcer barely spoke.

"You're on the train, aren't you?" Harry cut to the chase anxiously. He wanted to meet the one person who understood him, once and for all.

"I am. I want to see you," the other boy said plainly. He sounded candid as ever.

"Finally," Harry said, sighing. "Where are you?"

"I'm in the front compartment. Only Harry Potter is here."

Harry froze and dropped the phone immediately.

"Malfoy! It's been you!" Harry screamed, and he saw Malfoy, too, drop the phone and freeze in horror and shock.

"Potter ... Potter. Famous Harry Potter alone for once," Malfoy hissed at him. "Why aren't Weasley and Granger here to save you?"

"Because I was the one to always save them," Harry whispered, realizing the truth for the first time. "I can't believe it's been you."

"Yes, well, now I know the mistake I've made. Go back to your Blood Traitor and Mudblood, why don't you?" But Malfoy didn't put as much force into what he had said as he probably meant to.

Harry was about to defend Ron and Hermione but didn't. "Because they can't understand - you can! You know what it's like to be alone," Harry said very quietly, not looking Malfoy in the eye.

"Maybe I don't want to understand you." Draco didn't sound mean at all this time, at least not exactly. What his entire demeanor resounded with right now was Malfoy's inner desire to have his thick skin of pride and control, elite Malfoy style and all, returned to him. But no, that was certainly not the case here, because the fifteen-year-old disturbed person in front of him (prat or otherwise) was a dying spirit; but somehow, despite that accurate cold, sobering observation of Draco Malfoy right as Harry saw him right now, when he looked closer he saw a lonely special fifteen-year-old boy that Harry now recognized, and not with straight disgust either, was like-minded in many intellectual ways. Intriguingly, although Malfoy did great as either Harry's greatest enemy or greatest friend alike, the "stranger"' he unknowingly befriended all summer was definitely the version Harry preferred seeing.

Likewise, it was terribly alarming to Harry when he found himself instantaneously worried for Malfoy. Maybe that was why he felt himself super-attuned with Draco's persona right now, because despite the fact that the stranger he'd grown fond of turned out to not be a stranger, Harry was still intrigued and curious as ever, stranger or not. Harry wondered if the boy knew that his ambivalent body language was speaking louder and clearer than words could've right then (or at least for Harry it was). And even more curiously, Harry wondered whether Malfoy, too, could tell that there was more than one scared, hopeless, distrustful boy here right now...

"Maybe. But I'm not sure if that's true," Harry said calmly, trying to be a nonthreatening observer. "You've always been alone, Malfoy. Haven't you?"

For a split-second Malfoy looked speechlessly mortified, then every bone in his body became a defensive one and he lashed out at Harry. "What? You don't know what the ruddy hell you're talking about, Potter. Lost your marbles, have you?" Draco hissed at him. However, while his voice was terse with insult and offense, the shingles of Malfoy's emotional delivery hung in the air quite uncomfortably, almost less - willful?

"Malfoy you've been so out of the league of Crabbe and Goyle it's nearly funny," Harry patiently tried, making sure to say this in a manner that Malfoy could in no way construe to have been meant as an insult. "You're better than them."

Harry wouldn't have normally ever said that. Definitely not. Regardless, now more than ever he knew it was true (more so than did everyone else notably, given their secret summer communication). Draco Malfoy: Top student in year other than Hermione, handsome, rich... But mean, always cruel to people - yet still, girls ran after him.

"Crabbe and Goyle can't help me," Malfoy muttered accidentally. But the voice saying those six words was so low and soulless and tortured-sounding, Harry wasn't sure it was Malfoy who'd spoken at all for a second.

"Is your father going to make you a Death Eater?" Harry asked him pleadingly, trying to sound gentle. Malfoy said nothing. "That's what it is, isn't it?"

"Leave me alone, Potter! This never happened!" Malfoy refuted indignantly, then stormed out manically.

Disgruntled, Harry quickly went to find Hermione and Ron and failed. But given that they were officially the new Gryffindor prefects, Harry guessed they were at their first meeting since they were nowhere to be found. Instead, he was relieved to find Ginny alone in a compartment and sat with her.

"Hi Ginny," said Harry wearily. Sitting down, he immediately felt the awkwardness of it being just him and Ginny for once.

"Wow, you're actually speaking! Should I call Madam Pomfrey and let her known an imposter's possessed the real Harry Potter?" Ginny joked sarcastically, turning a little pink and literally surprised nonetheless. "...And to me of all people. What an honor."

He shrugged, ___hiccoughing_ when he tried laughing her off. "...It's just been hard," Harry expressed in a very conceding, short few words.

"I know, I understand. After what I went through, I was like that. Ron always complaining that you're not yourself, Hermione so worried, but I understand. It was traumatic," Ginny said darkly. Harry was so surprised in how much Ginny had grown up.

"You're right. Right now, I dunno, I just - I'm not going to be the hero anymore. I'm tired," Harry confessed impulsively.

Ginny remained quiet and listened without judgment, her eyes optimally focused on Harry.

Harry thought about Malfoy. He looked sad and tired, yet as usual, as handsome as ever. His silvery-blonde hair shined just right, and his facial features shined above any other - Malfoy had truly grown into himself just perfectly. Harry had never properly noticed Malfoy's looks before, but they were so obvious now, it was amazing. But why, ___why_ did he actually find Malfoy attractive all the sudden?

* * *

Draco had no idea why he felt a little guilty for brutally yelling at Potter, but he did. After all, it did seem like Potter was trying to help him in some way. He had blown him off and found Crabbe, Goyle, Pansy Parkinson and Blaze Zabini hanging together in a compartment.

"Draco, we've been looking for you," Pansy said. "Sit here." She motioned next to her.

"Sorry, a bit caught up," Draco answered casually. He sat down but did not speak again.

"Did you see Granger? Looking like the little white rabbit running around the train!" They all laughed, including Draco. Pansy then imitated her. "First years, please be careful ... Oh none of those ... Those are banned ... Ugh, shut up you filthy Mudblood!"

"Even Potter stayed away," Blaze said airily as she fixed her silky brunette curls, "saw him stalking off on his own."

Draco began listening more carefully now.

"Bloody Potter, so perfect, such a hero," mocked Crabbe.

"Yes, well we all must bow down and worship The Boy Who Lived ..." mocked Goyle.

"Bloody Potter isn't happy unless he's got the front page of the Daily Prophet!" Zabini said outrageously.

Everyone laughed but not for long, surprisingly -

"Leave it already!" Draco had no idea what had made him say it but he did. He did not like to hear Potter mocked all the sudden. Why, why? Draco did not know. But something about the way they spoke of Potter upset him and he did not like it.

"Draco, what's wrong?" Pansy asked soothingly, alarmed.

"Nothing. Everything is just fine." But the tone of Draco's abrasive voice said otherwise. He did not speak afterward. He instead lost himself in thought over the misery that was to ensue. He thought of his father. He thought of Voldemort. He thought of Potter. He wondered what Potter would do in his case. ___Potter always does what is right_, Draco thought.

Potter had seemed happy before but now Draco wasn't so sure. The conversations he had had with him had proved otherwise. Potter seemed upset. It looked as though Potter didn't want to be 'golden boy' anymore. He didn't want to save the world anymore. Potter wanted a real life, not one that faced death every day. But Potter had no choice ... ___Just like me_, Draco realized uncomfortably.

As Draco and his group got off the train, Draco looked at Potter. He had grown up a lot from the eleven-year-old boy he had met in Diagon Alley. He was not conventionally handsome exactly, but he had grown into his body well. His green eyes glowed. He had gotten much taller these days. He looked more like a young man than a little boy. And Draco didn't know why, but somehow, someway ... the only way Draco could think to describe Harry now was...

Well no, he didn't think he could bear it as he boarded the carriages that would take him to Hogwarts.

* * *

**Author's Endnote**: Stay tuned for more! The excitement comes quick!


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Summary:** In which secrets are kept, feelings are made, Moody is back, Draco *is* moody, Harry is hopeful, and all hell breaks loose ... Sort of.

* * *

Chapter Two

_When you're beautiful and dying,_

_All the world that you've denied._

_When the water is too deep,_

_You can close your eyes and really sleep tonight._

The next day at breakfast when Professor McGonagall was passing out their course schedules, Harry realized they would be having their least favorite class today: Double Potions with the Slytherins. Secretly, nonetheless Harry really wanted to see Malfoy, perhaps even to speak to him somehow. Maybe things could still turn out well?

They had it first hour though, so there wasn't much time to think of anything clever, unfortunately. Ron and Hermione followed beside him as usual, but Harry almost didn't speak to them at all. He wasn't sure exactly why, but he almost felt mad at them. They expected him to just get over huge things that affected him worse than anyone else, which made Harry wonder if they actually thought it was easy being him. Needlessly said, either way it was a little disappointing that it was Ginny, not them, who clearly understood how he was feeling (at least a bit anyway). No one else he spoke to so far had been able to tell "Perfect Harry Potter" was on extended vacation. His own best friends were still trying to find what was wrong with him, after all...

"Harry, are you sure you're just fine?" Hermione asked, sounding worried.

"You seem a bit off, mate, you do," Ron said mildly. Luckily Ron never nagged nearly as much as Hermione, though.

"Of course I'm fine," Harry responded tenaciously.

In any case, as Harry entered Double Potions with Ron and Hermione, he saw every seat on the classroom's 'Slytherin side' was filled except Malfoy's. Stung by his own sigh and sudden stomach-flip, Harry shrugged off what he guiltily dreaded was disappointment as the three of them took their normal seats. Feeling utter embarrassment for his unacceptable feelings, Harry quietly just got a quill and parchment out and ready while waiting for Snape, looking dead-forward inconspicuously. Although this helped Harry distract from his regretful desire to see his worst enemy, it stopped him from noticing when Draco Malfoy irritably took the last seat right behind him.

"SILENCE!" bellowed Snape, his voice even more agitated than usual. Once again he had been denied the Defense Against the Dark Arts post, which was being taken up by the _real _Mad-Eye Moody now.

Nonetheless, Malfoy and Harry didn't have any interaction until something happened midway into Snape's unending lecture.

A fourth year came in unannounced to Snape's utmost annoyance. Looking fearful for her own life, the timid girl stumbled on her words. "Um, please Sir, Professor Moody asks if he could have two students help get a few things moved for him. Says he'd appreciate it very much, Sir."

"Ah," Snape replied with false politeness, half-mumbling something about '_slave duty_' and '_not my problem_' under his breath. "Potter, Malfoy, go. _And hurry up_."

Harry left with Malfoy feeling a bit uncomfortable yet a bit, well, _excited. _At the same time, Harry didn't know what the bloody hell to say.

"He's just right out the dungeons," the girl squeaked fast, and then sped off.

"Wonder what he'll have us do," Harry said casually, trying to make conversation.

"Something mad, knowing him ... Err, anyway Potter, _Look._" Malfoy seemed less of a prick now, diplomatic-sounding. Huffing out a sigh of patience, Malfoy stopped dead in his tracks, and Harry, unaware, did as well. Malfoy surveyed Harry upward and downward for a suspicious moment, narrowing his eyes accusingly here and there, but then finally unfolded his arms from his chest and addressed Harry eye-to-eye. "We have had some correspondence, and it worked out that we got along. So it isn't exactly necessary for us to continue going out of our separate ways to torment each other - only because that makes life more difficult, I reckon." Malfoy had turned pink as ever and was no longer looking at Harry directly in the eye.

Harry was shocked but recovered fast, saying tightly, "I agree."

"However, that _so_does not mean we are public associates. This understanding must remain a secret, Potter, as I will not be publicly embarrassed!" Malfoy's face was stern, his jaw set, and his eyes wide and open.

"All right, Draco," agreed Harry, who was now smiling. "So, are you ready to talk about it?"

"I think so," Draco said carefully.

They met Mad-Eye Moody, who had them go to the third floor and retrieve a few boxes from a closet.

"My father wants me to be a Death Eater," Draco explained darkly. "I don't want to. Not because I'm afraid, but I don't want to end up in Azkaban."

Harry looked at Draco, who looked sad, yet somehow relieved to get it out. Harry also had to admit Draco looked handsome even when looking as though he needed assistance. But wait, why was he finding a boy, Draco, handsome?

"I figured. We're not going to let that happen," Harry assured, though he wasn't sure how that was going to happen. "You know, I'm really sorry that we spent years hating each other."

And Harry meant it.

"Well thanks. But it was good fun." Draco smirked at him. "And this won't stop me from beating you at Quidditch!"

"Hah! Funny, you've never been able to win yet!" Harry was laughing harder than ever.

"We'll see this season!" Draco dished back, and they laughed together.

It was the first true laugh Harry experienced since the end of last term.

Draco didn't understand what he was feeling. When he had seen Harry laugh earlier that day, he had actually found himself being, being..._turned on_. Was he gay? Was he attracted to Harry? Yes, they were on fine terms now, but still, did Draco feel something more? All he knew was that he wanted to be with Harry again, and soon. So Draco decided to send Harry a letter the next day for him to receive at breakfast.

_It's your radio boy. Meet me at the tallest astronomy tower tonight at midnight_.

Draco watched Harry read it at breakfast, and Harry gave him a very careful gesture to show he accepted.

* * *

So, that unexpectedly chilly night, Draco found Harry already there waiting for him. "Harry ..." he began, but then realized he was being strange. "What's up?" he ended lamely.

"Loads of work. Hermione's been helping me a bit. Everyone's so worried about me," Harry said a bit anxiously, reminded of his overwhelming real life.

"I noticed Weasley and Granger follow you like a bloody shadow," Draco said.

"Yeah, I know they care, but well, you know," Harry said. He was obviously finding it hard to express himself.

They talked for a bit about nothing really, just enjoying themselves and mocking Filch and others.

"What's the deal with Granger and Weasley?" asked Draco curiously, boldly not bothering with tact. It had been so obvious they had something going on for a while now.

"Umm ... what do you mean?" Harry sounded uncomfortable.

"Please, Potter, could it be more obvious?" Draco, not at all humored, went right for the point.

"Well, it's always been sort of obvious, hasn't it? Who knows what they'll do about it, though."

Draco believed Harry. It seemed as though his friends were probably hiding a bit about their feelings from him.

"And, err, what about you? Any interests, you reckon?" Draco really felt like he was almost giving himself away, though he hoped he wasn't.

"Someone I know I can't have." Oddly, Harry did not look him in the eye.

"Cho?" asked Draco, as he had known Harry felt something for her for a while.

"No. Anyway ..." Harry drifted uncertainly, taken aback.

It was odd for the next few moments, but then they returned to normal when Harry suddenly found himself bursting with an idea. "Let's make this ours," he challenged saying at one point, daring to open his pride to Malfoy's mockery.

"What do you mean?" Draco asked curiously.

"This tower."

"Oh right. Let's just put a sign up then," Draco said sarcastically.

"Nah." Harry seemed to be pretending not to catch Draco's sarcasm, steadfast to advert, "How about, um - the Boys on the Radio? We could write it on the wall and no one else would know what it meant."

Draco actually liked the idea. It did seem sort of interesting: a mark of the bond between the Boys on the Radio, commemorating how they had started. "All right, Potter, do it then."

Harry took his wand and did a spell and wrote on the wall in big, dark, red letters 'BOYS ON THE RADIO'. It looked pretty cool.

"How is it?" Harry asked impatiently, grinning.

"Nice, I like it," Draco said in approval. Draco went over by Harry. "The first real time we met was over the radio."

And Draco realized how odd that must have sounded. And Draco realized just then how close they actually were. Must have been less than a foot they were apart from each other. It was right then that Draco wanted to tell him. He felt something for Harry Potter. What was it? Was it...

"It's getting late," Harry warned. "We had better get back."

Draco snapped into reality. "Right, right," he whispered. "Filch will get us with his mad cat."

* * *

Last night had been strange for Harry. He had met Draco and quite enjoyed himself. But it was hard being around Draco. He felt some type of strange ... vibration when he was around Draco. And the scary part was it was similar to the way it had been when he had discovered Cho. Except that he had moved on from Cho now. What feelings did he have for Draco?

It had been strange. At one point in their meeting they had been very close, and Harry nearly kissed him. He used enough self-control to make a lame excuse to get to bed, where he silently pleasured himself to thought of ... Draco.

And Harry knew it. He would never admit it. But he cared about Draco in a way he never thought he would. Draco Malfoy...Somehow the only person who understood him. Draco Malfoy ... a god when it came to looks. Draco Malfoy... how could he have not seen that he was so _brilliant _all this time?

"Harry Potter!" It was the voice of Professor Flitwick, who had been calling the roll.

Harry looked up. He had been daydreaming terribly. Ron and Hermione were looking at him oddly. Of course, this was normal these days.

"Pay attention," Hermione half-scolded whilst sounding half-concerned, as though trying not to be too stern.

* * *

The Gryffindors and Slytherins had Care of Magical Creatures together again. Draco liked that he'd be able to see Harry, but it put them in a difficult position with their peers around. They would probably be forced to be cruel to each other. They had already agreed not to make their friendship (if that's what they could call it) public.

But at one point, towards the end of their lesson, Harry leaned over to 'pick up his wand' and whispered to Draco, "Again, tonight."

Draco nodded very quickly.

* * *

The rest of the day went by quite normally. Draco tried to spend as little time as he could with his Slytherin gang, as they were so annoying these days. Crabbe and Goyle were going to become terrible Death Eaters, Draco knew this. And Pansy and Blaze just found it all utterly fascinating. Draco refused to speak to them of all people on the subject.

That night, Draco met Harry again at the same spot. Only this time, Draco honestly hoped that he would be able to make some type of move, and pray Harry agreed with it. Draco honestly hoped Harry felt the way he did. There was no denying it ... he wanted Harry.

"Nice night," Harry said.

"I need some relaxation. Two bloody days in and we have enough homework to take up all term," Draco said truthfully, then turning persuasive. "Want to go to Hogsmeade? I know a place that you'd like."

"Draco, are you insane? We'll be caught!" Harry cried out incredulously.

"Got your cloak?" Draco was smiling.

* * *

Harry did not know how Draco and himself had ended up under his Invisibility Cloak headed for Hogsmeade, but it had happened. Harry was a bit anxious, but doubted they were going anywhere that wasn't interesting. This was Draco Malfoy after all.

"Hog's Head is really relaxed about student drinking," Draco said pleasantly, and they approached the entrance. Harry smiled a bit. Hagrid had gotten the dragon Norbert from this place, and said it was a bit shady.

They took off the cloak and entered. There were a couple of shady characters around, but Draco and Harry took their own table. A little lady came about. "What can I get you two?"

"Two glasses of Dragon Wine, please," Draco said. Harry did not speak. He decided Draco probably knew what he was doing in this case. Harry hadn't had much experience drinking before, but somehow Harry realized Draco probably had a lot of experience.

The lady returned a few minutes later with two glasses of a green substance.

"Drink up, Harry. It will ... soothe you," Draco compelled his trust by not wasting a hesitant moment himself, sipping his own drink earnestly.

Harry took a small sip. Just one sip felt very, very strong. The taste was nothing familiar at all. But taking another, and another, it tasted good. It just took a bit to get used to the strong taste of it. But in the end Harry was enjoying it, and finished his glass at the same time Draco did. Harry felt much more relaxed now.

"I'll take another of that," Harry said bravely. Draco was smiling. The lady returned with two more glasses.

Draco and Harry were laughing wholeheartedly now at things only they could possibly understand. Harry felt much happier than he had in a while. The hell with Voldemort ... The hell with saving the world... How about saving Harry first?

Harry asked, "So, Draco, tell me, who have you shagged in our year?" There were no limitations at this point as far as he was concerned.

"Another glass, mate, yes, cheers, cheers! Well, Potter, um, I'm reluctant to give you the _honest_ answer, but hell I've bloody drunk my wits away anyway..." Draco, puffy-eyed and red-cheeked, ran his tongue not without a little slur as he confessed with exaggerated embarrassment, "Err, oh fine - No one, okay, Potter, satisfied! Yes, that's right, me, Draco Malfoy, has shagged bloody no one yet! Did get close at the Yule Ball with Pansy, but you know how girls are, effing fickle see... Anyhow, and what number would be _your s_on the scale of Hogwarts action, Potter?"

This time a lady bartender with flaring red hair brought two more glasses.

"Same boat, mate," Harry concurred placidly, gulping down half the glass.

"Granger isn't half ugly anymore," Draco remarked casually. "Those breasts push out to the moon now, don't they Potter?"

"I've always wanted to fly to the moon," Harry said distractedly, not even realizing this until just now. It took him a moment to even realize what he had just said had nothing to do with what Draco said.

"Right, well, I wouldn't mind shagging her. But she has Weasley," Draco entertained, then finished his glass.

"Damn, Draco, every girl wants you. And some boys," Harry was staring at Draco strangely now. What was he doing? But Harry didn't seem to be able to stop himself. "You are quite sexy, Draco."

Harry could not believe he had just said that.

"Another glass," Draco said. "Well, obviously." Draco was looking carefully at Harry though. He looked shocked, even if he did have a lot to drink.

The lady brought them their next two glasses. Draco feared the bill in the end.

"A toast to the Boys on the Radio!" Harry declared standing up. Draco stood up as well. They made a toast and they both drank the entire glass in one gulp.

"That's enough for now, I think," Draco said. Or at least that's what Harry thought he heard. He felt a bit dizzy yet happy.

When they left, Draco led him back to Hogwarts. "I can find my way from here," Draco said. "Take the cloak, and don't get caught."

"Thanks, Draco. That was really fun, Mate!" Harry cheered. "Tomorrow night, again?"

Harry wanted to do something again, even if it wasn't the Hog's Head.

"Yeah, we'll do something fun," Draco assured, and patted him on the back.

And it was then that Harry looked deeply at Draco. They were very close, as they were still under the cloak. Harry could hear Draco's breathing. Neither of them got out of the cloak or moved at all. They stared at each for a moment. But it was Draco who came closer... And closer ...

What was going on? Suddenly, Harry could smell Draco's scent. Oh, how intoxicating it was... And Harry got a bit closer... Harry could see a very small zit on Draco's forehead ... And their lips locked...

Harry wasn't sure how it happened. But it felt so right. Harry put his hand on Draco's chin ... The kiss was intoxicating him ... But wasn't he already? It didn't matter... All that mattered was that they stayed locked together in the passion that Harry had never experienced so deeply with anyone... And then it ended.

"Harry ... Harry ... Harry..." That was all Harry could hear Draco passionately say. And the next moment, Draco was out of the cloak and had entered the castle.

* * *

**Author's Endnote**: ...The excitement begins! Keep reading, I assure you, you won't be disappointed. Lots of character building, action, and more coming right up :)!


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

_You know what to do,_

_Oh baby, fly away —_

In the short few hours that Draco did get to sleep that tonight, his dreams were about nothing but Harry of course. Draco could not stop thinking about everything that had happened with Harry last night - well, the parts he could remember, that is. They both had gotten very, very drunk after all. But, Draco did TOTALLY remember them kissing, and that it'd been a very mutually driven thing. With vividness in fact, Draco truly remembered the kiss being _ecstasy_, like no pleasure he'd ever experienced before...

The fact that Draco now knew Harry somehow, someway wanted him as well was of course the most exciting thing. Draco wasn't even sure how the kiss had been initiated but it honestly didn't matter. What mattered was Harry Potter wanted him... And he wanted Harry Potter. All day, all Draco could think about was meeting Harry again.

That thought certainly helped him get through the day as he suffered from a very bad hangover all day. He had Transfiguration, Charms, and Arithmancy that day and it was hell getting through it. When dinnertime finally arrived, Draco didn't even go down to eat. He went straight to the Slytherin dungeons and took a nap.

When he awoke, it was past eleven, and he would be meeting Harry soon. "Just in time," Draco whispered to himself. Draco wondered for a moment what he would do with Harry tonight. He certainly wanted to take Harry on another adventure outside of Hogwarts, but where, Draco was not totally sure yet. Wherever it was, he wanted it to be fun for Harry...

An idea struck Draco that was so brilliant and _so _obvious he nearly laughed out loud.

* * *

Harry, equipped with his Invisibility Cloak, headed to the Astronomy Tower. He was quite nervous. After what had happened the night before, Harry expected it would be weird being around Draco. But regardless, he knew Draco wanted him too, and _that _made him most excited. Harry would love to kiss Draco again, maybe more...

As Harry entered, Draco was already there, leaning against the wall with their signature name on it. "Hey, Harry." He gave Harry a rare smile - rare in Draco Malfoy's world since it was authentic.

"Hi." Harry knew he probably looked very nervous. "What are we going to do tonight?"

"I have something really fun planned," Draco promised, his smile widening. "But is there anything you want to do?"

Harry did not immediately answer, nervous. His heart was racing faster than ever — what he truly would like to do with Draco would be much too crude to say aloud. Harry smiled to himself, conceding to say, "I think I'll trust you, Mr. Malfoy."

"Good, hope you feel comfortable on a Shooting Star!" Draco looked absolutely delighted now as he showed Harry the two broomsticks that he'd hidden behind his back in the shadowy dark.

"Wha-what? Where are we going?" Harry was beyond surprise. So they were flying somewhere and Harry was expected to fly on something that was so slow it would make it across Hogwarts in a few hours?

"You'll see ... But no worries, you'll like it," Draco confidently enticed. "_Trust me_," he added in a quieter, more serious voice, looking straight at Harry.

Harry nodded acceptingly, but then quizzically asked, "But why these brooms?"

"Well, the place we're going to is a little ... Err... _shady._So I didn't want our brooms stolen or anything. I think you'd rather see the school brooms being stolen, right?" Draco smirked at Harry.

Had Draco Malfoy just thought of someone other than himself?

"Good idea," Harry agreed finally, breathless. The words he intended to say somehow did not come out.

Draco looked over at Harry. Harry looked absolutely graceful in the air. Even flying a virtually pointless Shooting Star, Harry looked as elegant as ever. Draco watched him very carefully. He was leading the way and he kept looking over to Harry to make sure the other boy was following, even though he knew he was.

Draco was taking Harry to a bar in his town for wizards. He was obviously well known there, and throughout the year he often went there for a drink. The barman never told his father, luckily, but since Lucius owned so many of the wizarding franchises in town, Draco got drinks for free anyway.

"Harry, I'm going to start descending now!" Draco forewarned, trying to sound as clear as possible. Harry nodded affirmatively. Nodding back, Draco flew closer to Harry's side and lent him one additional instruction. "_Whatever you do, follow my lead, Potter_."

Grinning wide, Harry again nodded — a slower, firmer one this time — and they began descending into Draco's hometown. Draco was flying in a very specific fashion to avoid Muggles, as his hometown still contained Muggle portions. But since Muggles made up only a few zones on the map and could see nothing of the other nine-tenths of wizarding populous, Draco didn't have too much difficulty navigating. The only thing Draco was really worried about was that he would somehow run into his father while in the company of who was supposed to be their worst enemy. Draco kept thinking reassuringly to himself, _Thank bloody God for Harry's Invisibility cloak_...

"We're going to land just behind that abandoned building, Harry, right ahead!" directed Draco, checking back on Harry. They were about fifteen feet above the ground now. Once Draco gracefully touched the ground and mounted off smoothly, he looked over and watched as Harry, who delightfully looked as though flying the skies had been enough of a treat, made an aerodynamically flawless landing. Draco felt almost _mundane _at being kicked dust in his own town, and by none other than Harry Potter ironically, a feeling that was so revoltingly not 'Malfoy' it had him incessantly shaking his head. But finally, once freed of such inferior self-sentiments, in a raspy voice Draco officially named their arrived destination aloud before Harry had time to bewilder him for too long. "Welcome to my town, Harry. Onrodaville."

"I reckon it is a bit bloody larger than any town_ I've _ever seen," Harry disbelieved, incredulously looking around with amazement at the wide radius of crowdedness in different directions.

"To us it is," Draco amused, chuckling a bit at Harry's utterly bamboozled disposition. "A lot of this town belongs to my father, the wizarding sections. The actual Muggle portion is not that big, really, but we share the town's name since the wizarding portions came long afterwards."

"Oh. Well I reckon it's pretty obvious why I thought the 'town' label was a little, um, modest...So anyway, where to, Mr. Malfoy?" Harry inquired, smiling. He sounded very curious about the city.

"First of all, ground rules — _MAJOR_ ground rules: This is a risk, but ... Look, no matter what just keep your hood up unless I've said otherwise. If all else fails you stay hidden, no exceptions_,_you hear, Potter? Now, we're going to stay under your Invisibility Cloak as long as possible. If anyone asks who you are, you are a good Slytherin friend. Which reminds me - get rid of that Gryffindor tie of yours. And if we're inside and my father is there put the cloak on IMMEDIATELY. Simple enough, right Potter? I did give you a dumbed-down Gryffindor version — oh the saint in me! _Now_ ..." His demanding tone and Gryffindor scoff was a stark reminder of the old Malfoy that Harry knew and resented, yet seeing the blustery irony of it _now _made him smile at a bad time. Draco narrowed his eyes and furrowed his brows, eagle-eye with paranoia, and rebutted patronizingly, "Something funny?"

Harry was half between a chuckle and a heart-race, and motioned it wise to comply fast. "No, nothing at all. Got it, Draco, I'm fine."

An awkward, luckily only momentary silence passed while Draco gazed at Harry with a cautious look of distrust animating his face. Though Harry somewhat humored it, on the other hand it unfortunately seemed literally _impossible_ to ignore that Draco's "reminiscing" attitude had nonetheless been a surprisingly major turn-on!

* * *

Minutes later, feeling prepared Harry and Draco left the useless Shooting Stars behind the abandoned office building. They put the Invisibility Cloak over themselves, and once again, Draco led the way: as they strolled up from the shady backstreet where they'd left their brooms behind, it took only but a minute or two before Harry knew they were re-emerging among the wizarding kind: crowding the mayhem of the street everywhere were partying socialites and their festivities, which left a trail of empty Firewhisky and drunks in cloaks everywhere. Overall, though, definitely the most flashy-looking event that passed Harry's eyes was a nightclub where wizards and witches not much older than them waited for entry, chattering loudly and inciting slight pandemonium in their disorganized lining-up.

"Are we going to a nightclub!" guessed Harry anxiously.

"Uh no, not yet anyway. We're going to have a few drinks at a place that's friendly with me," Draco explained briefly. His tone was harmless but he was still intentionally brushing Harry off from the details.

It was beginning to feel a bit awkward. They were once again in the position they had been in before when they had kissed. Draco was finding it hard to concentrate on finding their destination when he could _feel_ Harry breathing on him. They were so close. The things he would like to do...

"We're here, Harry," Draco confirmed as they finally arrived at a shady-looking bar that resembled the Hog's Head. The sign read 'Woeful Wizards' Getaway', which Draco always thought had been an odd name for the bar. But no matter, it didn't matter. "Take off the cloak now, but keep that hood up."

Harry entered the bar on Draco's side. He wasn't frightened at all, but he knew he should keep to Draco in such unfamiliar surroundings. After all, in the few years since Hagrid brought him his Hogwarts letter on his eleventh birthday, Harry had certainly never experienced this aspect of the wizarding world: tonight's surreal glimpsing into "Onrodaville", Harry realized at random, was his first sight of the "rougher" edges hidden within, ironically, an already hidden society of wizards and witches; fathoming everything, Harry deducted that while this type of environment was hardly the insidious rank of Knockturn Alley, it sure didn't resemble the accepted convention of Diagon Alley, either. Luckily this epiphany gladdened Harry despite the embarrassing disbelief that came with it, the sudden shame in his small-minded view of the wizarding world, which until now was one sheer concept: "_Voldemort ('evil') vs. the wizarding world ('good')." _At least now Harry noted that "gray" existed in-between the "black-and-white" of the wizarding world, too…

Oh, the many reasons Harry enjoyed being with Draco...

Harry desperately hoped for another kiss from Draco. He had been thinking of nothing but that since they got together. Draco seemed to be trying to impress him, though. And Harry did hope they would have as much fun as they did at the Hog's Head. Harry trusted Draco for that.

There were several wizards around. There was not a single female. The room was not very big, but as Harry saw, there were two double doors that led to a much bigger room. There were just a few tables with men who looked very drunk. On the front counter stood a very large man, who smiled at Draco at his entrance.

"Mister Malfoy! I had a feeling I'd be seeing you soon!" The man seemed pleasant enough. "But you have a friend with you?"

"Err, yes, yes I do. This is a good mate of mine called ..." Draco started awkwardly, his poker face only half as brilliant as usual for some strange reason.

"Merlin's beard, is that—"

"No," Harry said immediately, grinning innocently. "Get that a lot, though."

Draco let out a bitter laugh. "This is John ... John Smith," Draco said, a bit too quickly, but the barman didn't seem to notice.

"What can I get you, Mister Malfoy and Mister Smith?" the barman asked pleasantly, still smiling. Harry had a feeling Draco was a good tipper.

"Two Dragon Vodkas please," Draco said promptly.

"You got it, mates!" The barman turned around to the row of different bottled drinks side-by-side, took two long silver glasses from underneath the counter, grabbed a dark-green bottle off the stand (which, Harry noticed, coincidentally had the insignia of a Hungarian Horntail on the front), and poured them their drinks. He handed one to each of them, grinning, and said, "Enjoy the show, fellas! Let me know if you need anything, good man." He was winking at Draco specifically as the end-note, probably having inferred that he would indeed be tipping tonight since it was he who'd ordered the drinks.

"A show, you said? What _show_, exactly?" Harry asked prudently, unsurprisingly thrown off yet again by Draco, who was too busy being shown a glow-in-the-dark trick by the friendly barman. According to the little riffraff Harry, annoyed, bothered listening to, his understanding was that the show, whatever and wherever it was at, was charmed to make a wicked configuration of some awfully "shaggable" naked woman if all the guests' wands glowed in the dark simultaneously.

Draco must not have heard Harry's question, affective to the suspicion written all over Harry's demeanor. In fact, _Malfoy _(as Harry referred to Draco in a frustrated thought to himself) looked gleeful as he trustingly left the barman an early hefty tip for the useful demonstration, yet still ignored answering Harry's important question. Helpful several moments later however, Draco pointed in the right direction and Harry turned around with him, their drinks held up. (After all, entertainment would only provoke the two young men to drink more, and they both knew that too.)

"Come on, Harry!" Draco insisted devilishly, and Harry couldn't help but grin broadly. What did Draco Malfoy have planned?

Draco grabbed his arm, led him through adjacent double doors in a hurried fashion, exasperated to be on time to whatever he was getting them into. Regardless, now Harry, clueless but riveted, was actually joining Draco in pleasantly laughing.

Once they made it past a dimly-lit hallway of loos and pay phones, what Harry saw gave him a shock: they weren't just underage at _a _bar — they were underage in a strip bar! This room was much, much bigger and fittingly accommodated many more small tables, but in spite, tonight the crowd was so amazingly large that there still was not suffice seating for the countless drunken men about. Everyone was much too busy goggling toward the large, strobe-lighted stage, where currently beautiful women were dancing and throwing off more and more pieces of clothing. Draco looked over at Harry, slightly worried about first impressions, and luckily was quite reassured by those beautiful, mesmerized green eyes and his jaw-dropped goggling. Harry was grinning _so _widely as he watched the curvy, twenty-something blond throw off her top, in fact, that his cheekbones would hurt in the morning. He didn't even notice Draco's rather audible mocking laughing.

Harry thought of something odd for a moment. He had feelings for Draco, yet somehow, he still absolutely lusted for the women on stage. How was that possible? Harry had never been attracted to males before, and really, Draco still was the only one. Was this normal? Was this okay? Was there something wrong with _him_? Was he truly bisexual, gay or straight?

As a woman pulled off the rest of her clothing and began stroking her genitals, Harry put the thought out of his mind. He would enjoy the show. He looked at Draco, who didn't seem to be blinking as much as normal people as they took a seat.

"A toast to beautiful women, mate!" Harry sung enthusiastically, as they raised their glasses to each other. Harry took the first sip. Once again, the drink was bitter, but somehow, not as bitter as the drink he had had the night before. Harry assumed he was more used to alcohol now. And once again, the more he drank, the better the taste became.

The women on the stage began fondling with each other. Invigorated, Harry threw a Galleon onto the stage. He was beginning to feel aroused in every way, physically and mentally, and he sincerely hoped Draco didn't notice his uncontrollable foaming at mouth. The embarrassment would be too much. But Harry looked over at Draco ... Harry wasn't the only one hiding something.

Harry laughed. He honestly couldn't remember enjoying himself this much in a long time. For once, Voldemort meant nothing. It honestly was the last thing on Harry's mind. It was all Ron and Hermione talked about these days, and he could care less. He was allowed to enjoy life. And Draco was the first person to show him how.

"Refills, Gentlemen?" The cordial barman came by and before they had to even answer, exchanged their empty glasses for brand new full ones.

"How'd you like the Dragon's Vodka, _John_?" Draco humored him, somewhat rhetorically. He hadn't quite shaken off his unique, innate "Malfoy arrogance" yet, which tended to fill him with an annoying sense of overconfidence; except now it wasn't being used to aggravate the bloody hell out of Harry. They giggled.

"It's good, I liked it," Harry answered dazedly, added as a spacey afterthought, "It's bloody strong though, I reckon…"

"Yeah, we're only having two. We do have to fly back, you know!" Draco interjected with only half a straight face, which they laughed heartily at. Harry hadn't even thought of that really.

"Draco ... Thanks," Harry said plainly, too drunk to express himself as they left the bar an hour later. It wasn't helping that both boys were tripping and stumbling and sluggish as they struggled to stay under Harry's Invisibility Cloak. Had the street been just _slightly _less empty, they would have almost certainly been caught.

"For what, Harry?" Draco whispered a little too loudly, astounded. A sudden rush of Goosebumps and butterflies that had nothing to do with the cold and everything to do with Harry ran up Draco's spine. Regardless, they had to be quiet, they were still some villagers walking by, and they mustn't take risks. It'd be just a littleawkward if bystanders heard suspicious voices coming from nowhere.

"For teaching me to love myself," Harry whispered back softly, and Draco stopped dead. They simply looked at each blankly for a moment. "For teaching me I have to save myself before I save everyone else."

"Harry ... Harry ... _Oh, Harry_." Draco looked deeply to his enchanting green eyes. They froze for a moment. Harry almost felt a tear going down his eyes. Everything had happened so quickly...The Goblet of Fire revealed his name...Ron hated him for a bit...He almost couldn't get through the tasks...Cedric died ... Voldemort came back ... but somehow, with and through Draco, he knew everything would be okay.

"Draco, I ... I care about you, you know," Harry managed lamely. (In Harry's defense, needn't forget he was drunk beyond belief.)

"Come on, Harry," Draco sighed vulnerably, his gentled tone almost unrecognizable. Draco may not have noticed his falter, funnily enough, for his confident walk continued leading them, Harry guessed, to a more secure place. Draco led him to the back of the bar they had been in and threw the cloak off. "Harry ... I care you about you, too. You've made me happier than I've ever been — _really_."

"Draco ... I'm sorry we fought for so long. It's my fault really. You tried being nice to me on the train ..." Harry tried desperately, his tone almost urgent-sounding.

"Harry, no! I shouldn't have had a go at Weasley. It doesn't matter anymore. We're together now," Draco admitted maturely, and then he blushed.

Harry only smiled, lost for words. He was captivated by Draco, truly feeling for a moment that he would die if his heartbeat got any faster. He leaned in closer now to Draco and put his arms around him. He did not immediately kiss him. They hugged for a few moments. As Harry slowly released the hug, he leaned forward for the kiss. Draco got there first and kissed Harry. But it wasn't quite romantic. It was almost just...Affection. But Harry liked it that way.

Then suddenly, they heard people coming near. Without speaking, they both threw the cloak over themselves. And to Harry's horror, he recognized the voice: _it was Lucius Malfoy_!

"…Are you sure, Randall? You saw Draco here? He should be in school! And you say he was with a boy?"

"I couldn't see the boy's face, he had a hood up, but they were both in the bar."

"We will find him, then! When I am done with him, he'll be so sorry! I will not have my son disgrace me like this!" Lucius's anger was clearly beyond the spectrum of his control.

Draco was holding Harry. He was shaking. He looked over at Draco. He had never seen him so scared before ... ever. Harry held him tightly, and he closed his eyes in waiting. Lucius Malfoy and the other man walked right by them and looking around, seeing nothing, walked back. They waited for several moments.

"Harry ... Please, you can't let him find me. He'll do the Cruciatus Curse again, Harry. Please, get us out!" Draco sounded more panicked than he even did in their first year in the Forbidden Forest, when they had detention together.

"What ..." Harry was shocked as ever.

"I'll explain later. We have to go!"

Harry did not hesitate. Thinking for a moment of the quickest exit, he and Draco under the cloak followed the back paths to hopefully find the Shooting Stars still there. Several minutes passed by, and at one point, Harry thought he was lost but made a turn, and they were where they began. The Shooting Stars were there.

"Let's go, Harry." Draco's tone was marked by an austere definiteness, a bit calmer now. His voice wasn't demanding precisely, but it was guarded and expectant of compliance. And as they looked up and reassured themselves that the skies were calm, Harry saw something reminiscent of the old Malfoy, the arrogant git whom Harry now couldn't believe ever existed, although Harry knew it was nothing to overthink; Draco's bare instincts, uniquely his and his alone, were just harboring him a self-protective facade — the false appearance of bravery and confidence despite all-consuming fear — because it was all Draco knew to depend on when it came to survival...

Ironically, it began to rain hard as Harry gave Draco a final kiss before they departed.


	4. Chapter 4

**Author's Note: **Thanks for the two reviews I have gotten. I really hope to get more. I love getting feedback. It means so much to me.

* * *

Chapter Four

_Burn the sorrow from your eyes,_

_Oh come on, be alive again,_

_Don't lay down and die._

Harry could think of nothing but Draco. Draco had changed his life. He was so much happier. Even Ron and Hermione seemed to be worrying less about him, not breathing down his shoulder as much. Then again, Harry actually began talking to his friends again over the next few days. Draco and he did not meet again for the next few days, as the workload was getting to both of them.

But there were the letters. They sent letters to each other everyday, giving each other daily joy. They spoke of joyful things most of the time, such as each other, and the fun times they had had so far, but other times … they spoke of things more sinister. Harry talked about what happened in the graveyard; Draco talked about the abuse Lucius Malfoy had imposed on him such as using the Cruciatus Curse. But they were there for each other...

"Harry, are you listening?" It was Hermione's voice. Harry was just reading the latest letter from Draco, smiling to himself. "Ron and I have been wondering, are those letters from Sirius?"

"Uh …" Harry didn't know what to say that.

"We've been wondering how he is," Ron emphasized, growing impatient.

"Oh, err, he's good," said Harry awkwardly, nervously taken off guard. The last he heard Sirius was with Lupin. He knew Dumbledore was doing some type of thing against Voldemort, and he knew Sirius, Lupin, and others were involved.

Hermione looked at him curiously, but very seriously. "Harry … Something is so different about you."

And at that she and Ron got up and left.

* * *

Draco sat alone in the common room, thinking of Harry. He was the only person who made him happy. He wanted to see him that night. He would have to send it in a letter tonight, and have it get there tonight. It was Friday now, so Draco supposed they both had more time now.

So Draco took some parchment and a quill and wrote a quick letter to Harry, telling him to meet in their usual meeting place. Draco would know if Harry got the letter because he would be seeing him at dinner in an hour or so. Draco sent his owl to Gryffindor tower with his letter.

At dinner, Draco entered and made a quick signal to Harry, who winked at him. Harry had gotten the letter. Draco smiled to himself. He wondered where he would take Harry today. He would not be going back to his hometown. His father had owled him the next day after he had nearly caught him, threatening him. They would have to go somewhere else.

As Draco walked up the Astronomy Tower that night, he admittedly wasn't totally sure where they were going. This time, Harry was already there. He was smiling.

"Draco, I've missed you, you know," Harry said, in a very honest way.

"So have I. Those letters have helped a lot," Draco responded deeply.

And then Draco kissed Harry. Once again, the intoxication of the kiss entrapped him. This one was longer. They had time and space to appreciate the fact that they were together, kissing.

And finally, Harry released. "I brought my cloak. But tonight, I'm taking you somewhere."

"Eh?" Draco said, nervously but also curiously. What places did Harry know of?

"Trust me, Draco."

And Draco did. He went under the cloak with Harry, and Harry led the way. Draco wondered where their adventure would lead them this time. But Harry was not heading for the castle doors. So Harry was taking him somewhere inside Hogwarts. This, he could tell, would be sufficiently awkward.

They approached a statue of a one-eyed witch. Harry muttered something. They entered quickly. Draco was a bit worried and confused. Harry threw off the cloak from there. The passage was pretty dark.

"Harry, what is this?" Draco asked, finally. He was totally confused as to what Harry was trying to do.

"Well, this is a secret passageway to Hogsmeade," Harry explained. Draco nodded and looked around. He wondered how long it would take to get there. "It doesn't take too long," Harry added, as though he had read his mind.

"It must be safer," Draco said. "Where exactly does it lead to?"

"Honeydukes' cellar," Harry said, smiling mischievously.

"Damn, Harry!" But now Draco was beaming, unable to stop smiling; maybe because for the first time in his life, the delighted expression that he wore felt so genuine. in fact, which was an expression he had very seldom wore before _he and Harry_ - before the birth of the Boys on the Radio. "So when we get to Hogsmeade, I suppose we can go to the Hog's Head again."

"Yeah, and something more if you'd like," Harry suggested flirtatiously.

They were close again. Draco grabbed Harry's hand, put the cloak back on, and walking carefully through the narrow passage, they approached the entrance to Honeydukes after a bit. Though they had ventured through Hogsmeade before, he was relieved to be doing something almost safe.

"Make no noise," Harry warned, as they entered the Hogsmeade cellar. They were safely under the Invisibility Cloak. Draco was actually quite temped to grab some chocolate, but thought better of it. Draco took a glance out the window to make sure no one was near.

"_Alohomora_!" Draco whispered at the doorknob. The lock released instantly, and Draco and Harry pushed through the door.

It was pouring outside. That explained why there weren't many people at all on the streets. Either way it was very late, though. Only pubs were open. The Hog's Head was a bit of a walk unfortunately.

He loved being so close to Harry. He was the only person he felt that was actually trustworthy that he knew. And Draco always believed that a man could go crazy if he had no one to trust. He barely even talked to Crabbe and Goyle these days, unless he needed them for some reason. Blaze and Pansy, of course, never stopped harassing him. It was quite annoying, as they called each other best friends, yet they both were now fighting over him. But they would never have him. He only wanted one person.

Harry Potter.

* * *

Harry hated the rain. After having a near-death experience with rain in third year, he was very reluctant to be in it. However, he felt very safe with Draco this time. But Harry also felt a little guilty as he hadn't been spending enough time with Hermione and Ron. He promised himself he'd make more of an effort from now on.

They arrived at the Hog's Head, and carefully peeling in, noticed the bar was completely empty besides a strange looking wizard in a hooded, shabby looking cloak. They took off the cloak and entered. It felt much better inside.

"I hate the rain," Harry remarked, but only casually. He wasn't complaining, he was just glad to be out of it.

"Well I'm glad to be out of it, for sure," Draco said back. "Of course, we didn't get too wet, under the cloak and all."

Draco and Harry took a seat and a large man approached them.

"What can I get for you all?" He grunted.

"How about elf-made firewhisky?" Harry said, taking charge this time. Draco smirked at him.

"And you?"  
"Same," said Draco, still smiling.

Within a few moments, the man was back with two tall drinks for them.

"Now, drink slowly," Harry said, in a mocking voice.

"Oh, shut up, Potter," Draco said, and was smirking more than ever now.

And they drank.

"So, I see Pansy is going after you," Harry said, on their third glass.

"It's irritating. It's not just her. It's Blaze, too," Draco remarked.

"Ugh," Harry managed, as he swallowed down the last bit of his third glass and felt a bit dizzy at this point.

Draco looked at Harry. For an inexperienced drinker, he really did do rather well. It impressed Draco, even. He liked Harry even more for this. He loved to be around someone he could drink with.

"There's only one person I want right now," Draco found himself saying. As soon as he said, he blushed a terrible form of scarlet and could not believe he had said that.

They were both quiet for a moment.

"There's only person I want, too. What a coincidence," Harry said, smiling, and though Draco knew he meant it, at the same time, Harry was mocking him.

And then Draco trapped Harry in a fierce kiss. It didn't matter to him that the barman was staring at them, or that even the man in the cloak raised an eyebrow. He wanted Harry. At the moment, that was all he cared about.

"Harry … _ah _… let's go somewhere a bit more private," Draco finally said, still feeling the intoxication from the kiss.

"How about the passage we took to get here?" Harry suggested.

"Sounds good," Draco said, and he left the barman a good tip and they left. As it had stopped raining, finally, Draco and Harry literally rushed back to the entrance to Hogsmeade, and went through the secret entrance to the cellar.

And at that Draco could take it no longer. He threw Harry against the wall and began kissing him fiercely. Something about the darkness of the situation made it twice as romantic, and made Draco ten times as horny. Draco felt Harry grab at his arse ... _Ah, I'm in heaven _…

And suddenly, his trousers were down to his kneecaps, and only his undergarments remained. And for a second, Draco noticed Harry just staring. And then Harry bent down. Oh, Draco could barely contain himself … he was in ecstasy.

Harry did not immediately pull off his undergarments, but actually sucked on the outside of the underwear …. sucking on his now, fully erect penis. Draco had never felt such ecstasy before …. it was if he had died and gone to heaven … he never wanted it to stop … ever …

And his undergarments were off, revealing his fully erect penis, hitting Harry's cheekbone. A sly smile was on Harry's face, and Draco was giddy with joy. Knowing what was coming next, Draco closed his eyes.

Then he felt it … Harry had his mouth on the head of his penis …. _Surely, this is death and I'm in heaven_, thought Draco. He could not open his eyes; the mere sight of Harry would cause him to release. Draco simply stood there, moaning only ever so gently feeling the pleasure beyond pleasure ran throughout his body.

Harry released himself from Draco just before Draco climaxed. Draco moaned loudly now. He went to Harry, pulled down his trousers, but unlike Harry, simply pulled off the undergarments off Harry rather aggressively. And there revealed was a rather thick and long member in which belonged to Harry …

_Not anymore._

Draco did not immediately insert into his mouth. Using his left hand and putting a firm grip on Harry's penis, he stroked it gently …. then picking up the speed … a bit faster now … Harry was moaning, rather louder than Draco did … and then, fast and with no warning, Draco put his mouth on Harry's penis.

Harry moaned loud, like an animal's cry. Draco gave him a warning look, but he was still quite pleased with himself. Draco revolved his mouth a bit over the head of the penis, and with his hand, stroked the rest. And he continued on, watching Harry in ecstasy, and then finally releasing, right before it seemed Harry would climax.

Together, they lay down, holding each other, they began stroking each other. And just feeling each other over, lying next to each other, enjoying each other's touch … a gentle kiss all over ….

And Draco climaxed. A long climax …. a longer and bigger one than ever on before …. his seed spreading all over Harry and himself. Just afterwards, Harry did as well, moaning louder than he had before, his seed all over Draco … on his face …. somehow Draco found it terribly erotic.

"Oh, how I love pleasing the boy who lived," Draco whispered, licking Harry's earlobe now.

And together they dressed. It was getting near dawn.

* * *

**Author's Endnote**: Okay, well, if you have a problem with the erotica in this, get over it, or don't read. Please, please review. You're in for a big surprise next chapter.


	5. Chapter 5

**Author's Note: **Readers, I am of course aware that in _Half-Blood Prince_ it was officially revealed that the character of Blaise Zabini was a boy. However, prior divides in the fan fiction realm on the sex of "Blaise Zabini" - due to him being entirely unknown to us prior to HBP, of course - caused Blaise to be characterized as both male and female for many years_._ The "open door", perse, that grew from what then was just a 'nobody' Slytherin character intrigued me; I felt entitled to the creative license of portraying Blaize even** after the fact** as a girl, too. Hence, I purposely changed the spelling to the more feminine '_Blaze_' to show that I am consciously - NOT ignorantly_ -_ making this non-canonical distinction.

* * *

Chapter Five

_And I knew, love would tear you apart,_

_And I knew, the darkest secret of your heart._

The night with Draco was all Harry could think about as he lay in bed for a few hours, not going to sleep. When he finally fell asleep, he had vivid dreams of Draco. He tossed and turned and when he awoke, it was as though he had never slept at all. Harry was grateful it was the weekend.

Sometimes, throughout the course of the day, Harry seriously had to go back and ponder upon the night's events and decide whether it had truthfully occurred or not. Such bliss could not be of the Earth. It had been one of the most exciting and exhilarating nights of his life.

At lunch, Harry daydreamed of Draco, barely eating anything. He kept staring at the Slytherin table, in thought of only Draco, and their private pleasures. Draco, too, seemed to be eying him occasionally, though Draco seemed to be making an effort to not make it so obvious.

Ron and Hermione, seemed to once again notice his odd behavior, and as usual, questioned him about it. But of course, Harry had no real answers. Harry remembered he had told himself he would make a better effort with his two best friends, so, feeling guilty, tried to act as normal as possible

In the later evening, Angelina Johnson approached Harry. She wanted to talk about the new keeper for Gryffindor and so on, which did interest Harry, but took him by a surprise as well. He had forgotten Oliver Wood had left and they now needed to replace a keeper. Angelina seemed to be obsessed with finding a keeper just as good as Wood, and who worked well with the rest of the team.

"We do have to keep winning after all," Angelina said as an afterthought with a bright smile. "Of course we have the perfect seeker."

"Thanks, Angelina."

"I heard that foul git Malfoy has gotten better over the summer though and swears he'll beat us," Angelina resented telling him.

This angered Harry. Draco had not even had a chance to play Quidditch over the summer and the fact that people were spreading false rumors to make them have their usual fights was quite ridiculous. In the time they had spent together, they had barely mentioned Quidditch.

Harry simply gave her a silent nod. It wasn't as if he could possibly defend Draco.

* * *

Draco sent word to Harry to meet him at the same place, only after dinner. It wasn't as if there'd be much risk as no one had classes or anything. They had the Invisibility Cloak after all so it made no difference either way. Draco sighed as Pansy entered his dormitory. Once again Draco was reminded of the injustice that the girls could enter the boys' dormitory, but not the reverse. And since he had not been paying attention initially as he had been writing a note to Harry, Draco didn't get the chance to yell out that he was busy when she was coming up the stairs.

"Hey Draco," Pansy said, smiling at him, making it obvious she was ever so happy to be with him. "You know what I just heard?"

Oh God, does she think I care? "No, Pansy," Draco said, with forced patience.

"I heard Potter was making fun of how Professor McGonagall scolded you the other day for not paying attention," she said, as though she had truly only told him for his own good. But because it was Pansy, Draco was positive she had wanted nothing more than to get a rise out of him, and to look special too, no doubt.

The odd factor was that if this had been told to Draco only a few short months ago, Draco would have pouted and been upset and spent an hour despising Harry, as he had regularly done before. But now, Draco did not even believe Pansy. He realized now, the feud between the two of them was an illusion to some degree, fueled by the expectations of other students.

Draco wondered briefly if Pansy had made the whole thing up herself. It was quite possible. But then again, as much as she admired him, he truly did not know if she would lie to him. Draco concluded some other random Slytherin had made up this information. It was quite an annoyance really.

"Oh okay." That was all the satisfaction Draco bothered giving her, barely even trying to contain the fact that he did not care very much.

"You alright, Draco? You seem so different these days," Pansy worried, speaking in a motherly fashion.

"Oh yes, I just need a bit of a ... lie in," Draco invented fast.

Pansy eyed him in a peculiar fashion and then left.

* * *

After dinner, Harry rushed up to the Astronomy Tower to meet Draco again. He barely had time to get his Invisibility Cloak and make up a pointless excuse to Hermione and Ron why he had to leave them but he didn't care. He would be with Draco. That was what mattered at the moment.

As he reached their usual spot on the tower, Draco stood there, with one of his trainers against the wall, standing there as usual, looking bored and as if he had been waiting for hours. Draco smiled at him.

"Got my note, did you?" Draco said. He looked pleased to see Harry, chipper-up.

"Yes ... And I hear you've been practicing Quidditch extra hard over the summer ..." Harry answered sardonically.

"Really? Don't speak to me, Potter! I hear you were talking about how Professor McGonagall told me off the other day!" Draco went along, and they were both enjoying themselves immensely now. Both knew neither story were true.

"She did?"

They both laughed together for a few moments.

"Pansy told me that. She came into the boys' dormitory harassing me," Draco explained bitterly, as though reminiscing about a terrible memory (which Harry reminded himself, probably was).

"Ah ... Angelina Johnson, the Gryffindor Quidditch Captain, told me you were training extra hard all summer and were desperate to beat me and our rivalry had apparently only gained strength. I forgot to mention that you, uh, went downtown for me just last night," Harry informed him, smiling widely as he rolled his eyes.

Draco laughed. "Well, we can forget such unimportant memories," Draco said rather sarcastically, and they laughed again.

Harry smiled. "What to do today, eh?" he said finally.

"Yes ... I'm a bit bored of getting drunk ..." Draco said, adding as an afterthought, "Makes me tired."

"Really?" Harry said in a very sarcastically astounded voice. "Strange."

"Don't mock me, Potter," Draco said, smirking.

"And what a lovely evening it is," Harry said innocently, looking off and ignoring Draco's last comment.

"I have an idea, actually," Draco said suddenly, smiling.

Harry looked at Draco. Whatever it was, Harry felt it was a risky adventure, sure to get them expelled. The thought was... exhilarating.

* * *

Draco made Harry retrieve his broom and come back. Then, Draco said they would be using only one broom to get where they were going. Draco put a weightlessness charm on Harry and throwing the Invisibility Cloak over them, Draco set off. Harry was holding onto Draco tight, which made Draco feel absolutely wonderful, as though he could fly around like this for an eternity...

"Draco, are we almost there?" Harry bugged, slightly aggravated after what must have been at least an hour.

They were soaring in the clouds for some time now.

"We're going to descend in a few minutes, Harry," Draco assured him calmly.

After a moment or two, Draco began descending. They were going to a perfectly Muggle area, so Draco would have to explain to Harry they would be using no magic at all. They landed right behind a grocery store. Draco cautiously surveyed their surroundings, and as no one was around, he threw the cloak off of them.

"We're in a Muggle town," Draco explained to Harry. "No magic or anything ..."

"What are we doing here?" Harry asked. He looked quite confused.

Draco couldn't blame him. "This is a Muggle village near my home. I didn't want to come back near here, but my father doesn't come to the Muggle village much at all," he took a moment to explain. "But stay cautious, okay?"

Harry nodded. "But what are we doing or getting here?" He was still bamboozled as to their purpose there.

"During the summer, I used to buy grass and smoke it. It was what kept me sane," Draco said quietly.

"Drugs kept you sane?" Harry said in obvious disbelief.

"You have to do them to understand, Harry. There's more to it than what they tell you," Draco defended confidently. "Come on. I'm going to show you another world."

Harry charmed the broom to make it invisible to the Muggle eye, as the Invisibility Cloak would be awkward to handle if he had to carry the broom inside it. Then he followed Draco. Draco seemed to know exactly where he was going, and the kind of environment they were in. It looked as though they were in a rather poor area, as most of the buildings looked very old, and the houses were small and some very unfurnished. It was almost laughable the thought that a Malfoy would be caught dead wandering around here.

As they continued on, it seemed to Harry that this was a shady part of town, too. It didn't help that the vast neighborhood had only an insufficient three streetlights, either. It left the area so dark this hour that it was spooky even to Harry. As they walked deeper along, Harry saw much graffiti vandalized on the walls of tacky buildings, impoverished homes, and offside alleyways. Crooked-seeming characters walked by in dark clothing, each yielding the look of someone you wouldn't want to disturb. Draco kept warning Harry to stay close, which he was instinctively doing anyway. After what felt like way too long, Draco made a last sharp turn and finally stopped at the end of a street called Norberry. A somewhat scruffy-looking boy who looked a bit older than them, but not by too much, was already waiting. When he recognized Draco's silhouette approaching, he'd signaled them to come closer.

They did.

"'Lo, Richard!" said the boy not exactly pleasantly. "Who's he?"

"Oh, just my friend ...So, Jason, listen. We just want to get some grass fast if that's possible," Draco said in a friendly tone. Harry exchanged a wry look with Draco.

"You know the deal," the boy Jason said automatically. (_A professional teenage drug pusher_, Harry thought sadly.)

Draco took out a twenty-pound note and gave it to the boy.

"Right this way," the shady older boy prompted, nodding. They followed him through a wooden gate a few houses away and entered the backyard of what likely must have been his house.

"Got some grass for you, no worries. I even rolled it up and all just like cigarettes for ya, mate," Jason informed them compellingly.

The smiling boy sold his discretion well, Harry had to give him that much.

Draco was almost embarrassed by Harry. He had to teach him how to properly smoke, and then how to properly smoke a joint. They sat in the back of the alley where they had arrived, after they had bought the grass, smoking it. Draco had gotten Harry a very low amount, so Harry wouldn't hurt himself. After all, Draco didn't know Harry's tolerance.

After they had been smoking a bit, Harry looked a bit zoned out. He looked focused but unfocused, alert but unable, inviting but uninviting. It was though Harry had traveled into an alternate dimension, but was somehow in limbo between realities.

"Draco ... this is amazing," Harry said, as though it was a battle to form those words, but at the same time, no trouble at all.

Draco had a much higher tolerance level, and at this point, was feeling barely anything except for a slight buzz. "I'm glad you like it, Potter." Draco smiled, foreseeing entertainment to come here no doubt (if past intoxicated behavior of Harry's was any indication). Attending his eyes and ears to Harry's silliness now, in a pleasant surprise Potter's buffoon-like antics actually made him feel the high more so.

Harry was laughing ... and laughing ... and laughing; it was almost disturbing. Draco slapped Harry across the face eventually, but Harry barely noticed. "Draco ... Look! Look at that ... over there ..." Harry was pointing at a point in the wall next to an N in a line of graffiti.

"Lovely. I think you've had enough for now," Draco said with forced patience, unimpressed.

Harry seized Draco by his collar, and was smiling a smile completely unnatural to Harry. His eyelids were bloodshot. "Draco ... you are so hot." He said those words as if he had just made a stunning discovery. "Look at your eyebrows ... I think I can count every little strand of your unflawed blonde... _hair_." He said the last, dumbly delayed word in a dreamy fashion.

Oh, what a day.

* * *

Harry woke up alarmed. Where was he? Harry opened his eyes more. It was daylight. He was in his bed at Hogwarts. But at what point, and how had he gotten there? The last he remembered he was with Draco, smoking grass, and it was a bit of a meddled memory. He had remembered passing out. He had no recollection of traveling back to Hogwarts. Draco must have brought him back...

The rest of the four-poster beds were empty. It must have been light out for a while now. Judging by the amount of sunlight, it must have been noon. And at that moment, Ron appeared in their dormitory.

"Finally up? Hermione had me come up and find you. I know you came in late ... We were so worried, you have no idea. Where were you?" Ron looked worried pale, quite demanding.

"I ... uh, fancied a bit of a walk," Harry said finally. He was too tired to invent something plausible.

"Harry ... I'm your best mate. What's going on?" Ron sounded sympathetic, but so demanding of an answer. But Harry understood it was out of pure care that he even bothered.

"Ron ... I ... I ..." Harry began, but was cut off.

"Awake, are you?" Hermione had now come up. "Harry, we were so worried about you! Where were you last night?" Hermione sounded so worried, and even worse than Ron.

"There was something I had to do. You guys, I will tell you soon, okay?" Harry tried to sound convincing. Ron and Hermione exchanged looks.

"We have lots of homework," Harry said swiftly, jumping up.

Ron and Hermione look at each other suspiciously, unsatisfied. No surprise there.

* * *

Draco had missed breakfast by a long shot. He barely awoke in enough time for lunch, in which Blaze and Pansy surrounded him, demanding to know which girl he had been with, and why it had not been one of them. Draco tried to ignore them.

"I'm really tired," Draco grunted. He barely had energy to be angry. He was so tired. He had flown Harry and he back and took Harry to his bed before he had had a chance to have a lie down himself.

"Were you and Potter dueling? I heard he got in late," Blaze suggested.

Draco became more alert, and nearly shook in apprehension. "Maybe," he said slyly.

"I'm surprised he's in one piece," Pansy said, making an astute admiring look.

"That filthy Potter, I must tell you. Yes, I had him really fucked up by the end. You should've seen him, girls!" Draco said, half-laughing, and smiled to himself.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter Six

_What's mine is yours,_

_You can have all of it,_

_I learn to beg._

Hermione and Ron were very careful with Harry over the course of the next few days. They never left his sight. They had of course figured Harry had not been totally truthful to them. Harry enjoyed their time together though, naturally, so he wasn't too put out. He appreciated their caring. But it unfortunately left basically no time for Draco, sadly.

So for now Harry returned to depending on the letters he and Draco sent back and forth. Missing each other more than ever too quickly, they even dared to write notes during their classes. When no one was looking, Harry quickly would pass a note to Draco. Then Draco would do the same. And Harry loved the notes Draco sent. They were often full of silly humor, or sarcasm, or making fun of the lesson, or anything Draco obviously knew would keep him entertained. Of course other times they were a bit more serious, concerning the next time they could meet, or how each other were doing. For four days after Harry had gotten high for the first time, this was their only form of communication.

Then, at the end of the week, it was finally time to select a new Keeper for Gryffindor. Harry was excited, of course. He loved Quidditch and wanted to start the new season. But it would be terribly awkward facing Draco this time around.

Harry showed up to Keeper tryouts in good spirits. He hoped to find a Keeper as skilled as Oliver Wood had been (wishful thinking) or at least nearly as good as Oliver (still wishful thinking). The old team was already on the Quidditch pitch, waiting for him, they sat on the stands, and the hopefuls were on the offside of the pitch.

"All right Harry?" Angelina smiled at him. She looked very nervous.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just anxious to find a new Keeper," Harry assured her. He grinned at his team.

As tryouts began, it became quite clear the majority could not have possibly been there to try out for the team. It seemed most had simply come to see the lunatic Harry Potter the Daily Prophet had been reporting. It certainly seemed like that anyway. Nearly all of them were completely dreadful. When they had nearly gone through them all, it seemed it'd be easier to have one of the old members simply play dual roles.

It was very hard to narrow it down as there weren't very many good ones. In the end, it seemed they had narrowed it down to about four half-decent players. Angelina decided to have them play a very short game with each and decide which worked the best for the team.

Everything was going pretty smoothly, at least initially. Then Harry's worst nightmare occurred. The Slytherin team came onto the field, putting tryouts to a halt. And to make matters worse, Draco was one of them.

It had not been Draco's idea. In fact, Draco had to finish a Potions assignment to begin with. But no, his fellow Slytherin team members insisted that they harass the Gryffindor team as they sought out a new Keeper. Draco had even tried to tell them not to waste their time, not that they listened.

It was going to be very odd indeed. Would he simply sneer and be evil to Harry as to not blow their cover? Could he simply remain silent and not be suspicious? And how would Harry react?

Draco was apprehensive as he scurried onto the pitch with the rest of his team. He hoped Harry did not think it been some elaborate idea of his own to torment his team as he had not even known of the idea till minutes ago.

"Honestly, man, what_ is_ that that you're flying, Johnson? Still on the Comet series are we? I think my great-grandfather flew that same model!" said Draco's captain, and Draco laughed with the rest of his team ...the joke had been funny. He had no allegiance to anyone there besides Harry anyway.

"Shut it!" Johnson screamed glaring at them all. "The field is booked for us and we certainly didn't invite any of you goons!"

"I'm sorry to tell you, but we don't take orders from filthy blood traitors and Mudbloods," hissed another of his team, mocking the Gryffindors a bit too far this time. The Gryffindors landed immediately. Harry looked nervous, but like Draco, he seemed to be trying to remain silent. Draco tried to signal to Harry, to give him some type of explanation if possible, sympathy even...

"Malfoy, tell us the story you told me how you saw Harry Potter with that blood traitor Ginny Weasley during the summer kissing? How disgusting!" said the Slytherin's captain.

His team laughed, but Draco did not. This made Draco quite livid, but he of course, did his best not to show it. He had never told anyone that nonsense story! Why did he lie to start even more problems? Would Harry believe him? Surely not ... but regardless, he did not particularly need any more false tension built up between the two of them.

But of course he had no choice, after all. Coming quickly to his senses, he put on the most evil grin. He looked at Harry, and attempted the most disgusting evil glare he could summon. Draco was terrific at saving desperate situations. He smiled at the rest of his team.

"Ha! Yes, of course. We all knew that little freckle-faced fire-head always had a thing for Mr. Potty. He gave in as it wasn't like he had many options!" Draco let out a mirthless laugh to seal it. He could do nothing. He couldn't have denied the story his captain had told.

The Slytherins all laughed, and glorified Draco for it. It was always this way, of course. Draco always had to lead them much of the time out of pointless situations like the current one ... at least, now he saw them as pointless. Harry had changed his perspective on so much.

Harry, luckily, seemed to have caught on. "Malfoy, you filthy git! You're so pathetic, making up lies to make your own life seem interesting. Fuck off!" Harry really was much less convincing, but it was passable. It was the Gryffindors who laughed this time.

"Don't worry, Malfoy. We don't need to be wasting our precious time with these filthy Gryffindors, anyway," said his captain, certainly loud enough for the Gryffindors to hear. He patted Draco on the back and they turned to leave.

And that's when Draco had his inspiration. He had only just come up with the idea. It wasn't exactly smart, and it was very reckless - almost Gryffindor, but it was the only way he could think of to communicate with Harry at that moment. So he did it.

"THE BOYS ON THE RADIO MEET TONIGHT," bellowed Draco, knowing everyone on the pitch had certainly heard him. Everybody looked at him as though he'd gone barmy, which was exactly the reaction he'd been hoping for. He just smirked as the Slytherins stalked off the Quidditch pitch.

Time was cutting close for Harry. Ron and Hermione had not gone to bed till nearly half after eleven. And then, of course, Harry had to wait for Ron to fall asleep, which thankfully, did not take too long. Harry careful crept out using the Invisibility Cloak with only ten minutes to spare.

And as he reached the top of the Astronomy Tower, Draco was waiting for him as usual, looking bored, as though he had been waiting ages. Harry had been late this time though. But he had no control over that situation. Not that it mattered anymore.

"You're late, Potter." Apparently it did. But he was smiling.

"Good to see you too, Malfoy," Harry said back, grinning. It certainly was. He had missed Draco a lot. The other night had been so confusing yet absolutely intoxicating he wished it would happen again. Knowing Draco, it would.

"Yes, well, they all want me," Draco claimed daringly. Somehow Harry was sure Draco probably meant this pretension.

"I missed you," Harry breathed, attempting to lead the conversation to a more serious tone. "That was dumb today at tryouts. I know you didn't actually tell him that."

"Yeah, I had a Potions essay to do and they dragged me along," Draco explained to him. "But anyway ... I see you forgot your broom, as did I."

Harry had completely forgotten. He turned red with embarrassment, ringing his arms along his side for a second. "Let's go to the Hog's Head, then," Harry finally suggested.

"I suppose," Draco agreed offhand in a rare gentle tone. "...In a bit though." Draco came closer to him. He had trouble speaking about his emotions sometimes. But he would show it. He stroked Harry's hair for an entrancing moment, breathed on the boy's neck. Then he gently kissed Harry. It was very intoxicating, as gentle as it was and all. It was the slightest touch that was enough to make Harry falter, somehow...

Draco put his hands on the waistband of Harry's trousers. Ever so slowly, he pulled them down. Harry knew what was coming and he could barely wait. Draco went down on his knees and pulled Harry's undergarments off immediately. (Harry imagined the time away from each other had gotten to Draco too!) And Draco's tongue slipped onto Harry's groin. Harry shut his eyes as he allowed Draco to pleasure him. His penis was inside Draco's mouth ... halfway ... and now nearly completely ... it was beyond intoxicating ... as though he had died in gone to heaven ... But he could not last as long this time.

He climaxed fast. As he did it was miraculous...For a moment, he could barely remember his own name or why he was even there or how he had gotten there. The only thing he knew was the intense pleasure he was feeling at that moment. It was indescribably perfect as he'd climaxed directly into Draco's mouth.

"Nice, Potter," Draco judged after a stretched breathless moment, out-of breath, and patted Harry's now flaccid penis a bit. "Liked that, did you?"

"Yes," Harry whispered.

Draco himself pulled Harry's trousers and undergarments back on. "And now for a bit of a drink...Or I mean, should I say, for us _both_ to have a drink this time."

"But I want to ..." Harry began desperately. He had wanted to pleasure Draco as well.

"Later," Draco reassured him, almost as a request, asking for an understanding.

Harry did, and cracked a small smile. Then Draco took Harry under the Invisibility Cloak as they had done before to the Hog's Head. This time when they arrived it was completely empty besides the barman. They took a seat, and the barman came over to them.

"Back again, eh?" he grunted at them.

Draco nodded. "Fetch us some fine red wine, good sir," Draco announced in a way that was very "Malfoy", his demanding voice full of aristocratic superiority.

"Okay, chap, but it won't be cheap," the barman harshly returned. Without waiting for an answer he unappreciatively stalked away.

"Draco! Why'd you talk to him like that?" Harry demanded to know.

"Like what?" Draco said, daring to pretend sounding mystified.

"You spoke to him like a bloody house-elf!" Harry disapproved a little impatiently.

"Oh, right," Draco uncaringly replied, speaking as though of the weather.

Harry glared at him but said nothing. "We have sat at this same table on every one of our visits here, you know," Harry observed finally.

Draco had not realized that fact. "Have we? In that case..." He took his wand, and in the same lettering as in the Astronomy Tower, Draco wrote '_Boys on the Radio_' on top the table in small print. Harry smiled at him happily.

"Lovely, Draco. Hopefully, we don't get accused of vandalism," Harry said, but they both laughed.

The barman came back with a bottle of wine and two glasses. He poured an equal amount into each. "I suppose you can do the rest, eh, mates?"

Once again, he stalked off.

"Cheers Potter!" Draco gestured brightly, and they shared a toast. Draco took a rather large portion of the red wine in his mouth. School had been quite stressful lately, had it not? He deserved it. Harry was apparently thinking along the same lines based on his liberal immediate intake. Feeling too satisfied with the scene; therefore, Draco hardly managed to say his approval as the liquor rapidly fingered his senses. "Oh, how just divine this is." He did quite love red wine.

"Yes, I like it as well," Harry agreed. "So, uh, have you heard from your father?" Harry must have been braver and more relaxed after a bit of alcohol in his system as that had been a bit of a bold, uninhibited question.

"I have - twice. And it's been full of nothing good at all, Harry— just horrendous stuff. I can bloody promise you that. Deplorable things to say, you know? He keeps telling me my destiny is sealed, I have no choice, and so on. Harry... I ..." But he couldn't say what he wanted to say. It was too difficult for him. It was such a hard thing for someone like Draco, who did not let down his guard nearly ever, be forced to discuss.

"Draco, I'm scared for you," Harry said in a very quiet voice. Harry had said the words Draco needed to have said. Of course, it was easier for Harry. It always would be.

Draco did not know how to respond to that. It made him uncomfortable. He had never felt that anyone actually cared for him as much as Harry did at that moment. It was uncomfortable because it was new, and it did frighten Draco a bit. But somewhere, with Harry, he trusted his words. Draco table-turned him suddenly, anyway, though. "What about you? Has Dumbledore approached you?" It seemed easier for Draco to feel comfortable with his care for Harry somehow than with Harry's care for him. But only Draco knew that he had that problem, and not at all planned to share it with Harry upfront.

"No...But it's the ones around me... like Hermione or Ron, for instance...They act as if I'm not doing what I'm supposed to be doing, you know? As if there is anything I can do," Harry vented out. Draco felt the anger and confusion as though he didn't know how to handle any of it. Of course, it was what had brought them together - the impossible situations both faced.

"The hell with them, then. All of them," Draco said. They were on their third glass now. Draco was beginning to feel much more comfortable with himself. Harry laughed at Draco's comment, a bit too much really. The alcohol was getting to Harry a bit now.

"I wish we could just wish them all away," Harry said, a little slower than normal, and as if what he said wasn't exactly what he had planned on saying.

Draco took the last bit of the first half of the bottle, and swallowed it down in one gulp. Now, his head was spinning a bit. Why was the table shaking ever so lightly yet how was he still not moving ... Harry was shaking his face back and forth ... and the entire bar was moving in a bit of a wish-wash movement ...

"Harry, let's go. I'm tired," Draco conceded. His voice genuinely sounded worn. Harry too looked very tired, except Harry was less in control of good judgment un-sober.

"Why? We've only just begun!" Harry said in fervent protest. Harry was tired but still sounded lively.

"We're going, Harry. _Take the bottle_." Draco's tone was very final this time. He helped Harry up. Draco was still seeing the whish-wash movements and the world was spinning and he just wanted to get back to the castle. He left a few galleons for the barman, and grabbing Harry's hand, he tried to guide himself and Harry out of the Hog's Head, which as simple as it sounded in their present state was hard. Draco knocked into the wall twice as a matter of fact before reaching the door (which he also stumbled right into the next second).

Once they were finally on the empty streets of Hogsmeade, Harry let go of Draco. Draco turned around swiftly, reflexively going to grab Harry, but Harry was on his hands and knees. And Draco understood. Harry had drunk too much too fast. Harry was throwing up copiously in front of him. Draco simply watched him. Harry would probably be a bit more sober when he was finished.

Harry sat up finally. "Draco ... ah ... I feel terrible," Harry moaned. He was clenching onto his stomach still, and it was obvious he had become very weak.

"Harry...Come here, I'll take you back," Draco assured him, trying to be comforting. Locating his wand, he cast the spell. "_Scourgify_!"

The mess was off of Harry. He picked Harry up, and began carrying him down the street back to Hogwarts. It was difficult for him, so much, but somehow, knowing Harry needed him and that he was weaker than him made him stronger.

Harry was a bit better now. Draco was with him in the Gryffindor common room, which was completely empty, a fact he was most grateful for at the moment. They sat by the fireplace, and Harry was sprawled on the armchair, not sitting upright at all. Draco was watching him, surveying him. Draco had said he would not leave until he was sure Harry would be fine.

"I think I can go to bed now. I'll be okay. Take my dad's cloak. I don't want you to get caught," Harry said, mustering all of his energy to speak.

"No, Harry it's yours, I can't take it," Draco protested.

"No, Draco, please take it. I want you to," Harry said again, insistent, breathing deeply. "What's mine is yours, Draco."

"Harry, please ..."

"_Go_."

Draco lowered to his level and kissed him one last time for the night, a longer one. This one with concentration, with more passion than ever, and with a feeling Harry was afraid to _dare_ think was emerging...But was it possible from Draco Malfoy?

"Be good, Harry," Draco weirdly advised. Whatever that meant, leaving it at that he left.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven

_Do what you want_

_Cause I'll do anything_

_I'll take the blame_

Awaking the next day, Harry was not feeling at all wonderful. In fact, he felt quite sicker than he had felt in some time. He had had much too much to drink, really, and Draco had as well. Harry wondered how Draco had managed to get them safely back to the castle. He had been so brave.

Harry couldn't completely remember what had happened; there were mostly blurred images in his head. But he remembered throwing up, and Draco, somehow carrying him. He didn't remember the trip back to the castle. But he did remember that Draco had been drinking a lot too. Of course, Draco was a much more experienced drinker.

Harry stayed in bed the following day. Ron and Hermione kept coming up but he insisted that he was sleep deprived and wanted to stay in bed the entire day. He only awoke around dusk to eat something as he had suddenly felt a rush of hunger through his body. He was feeling a bit better by then, though he still had an aching skull.

At dinner, he nearly waved at Draco but stopped himself just in time. He had been spending so much time with Draco he forgot they were supposed to hate each other publicly. He was glad to see though, that Draco had made it back to his dormitory without getting caught. The invisibility cloak certainly had its uses.

"Feeling better, Harry?" asked a worried Hermione next to him.

"We've been worried," Ron said.

"I was just really tired," Harry said, trying to sound as if he cared they had been worried. And then he silently cursed himself for not caring they had been worried. "I'm good now."

"Good, Harry. We need to finish that essay for Snape," Ron said. "We're going to the library. Are you feeling well enough to come along?"

"Sure," Harry said. This was mostly true. After eating some food, he did begin to feel a bit more restored than before. His headache didn't feel nearly as murderous as before and he felt a bit stronger now that he had eaten. "That essay is due Monday anyway."

So the three of them left together, as in old times, to the library to write their essays. At first, everything went absolutely smoothly. They did their research rather quickly, as they already had Hermione's extensive knowledge. Harry jotted down some notes with Ron and they began. They were half way through when a disturbance came to them.

"I think we'll be taking that book, Potter," Said a too familiar voice above him. It was Blaze Zabini with Goyle.

"Really? We were under the impression we were using them," Hermione said, with a smirk.

"I don't speak to filth, mudblood," Blaze scowled at her very cruelly.

Ron and Harry both got to their feet, facing Blaze and Goyle.

"Harry, no, they're filth, it isn't worth it," said a panicked Hermione.

But it wasn't right. Harry was quite nervous, yes. But it was unfair. They had been trying to work on their essay and the Slytherins had insisted on harassing them for no real reason. Surely there were many more books on the subject, but of course to them, that was beside the point.

"Are you going to fight me, Weasley?" grunted Goyle. He laughed rather loudly.

"I'll hex you, and mind you, we know some _good_ ones now," Ron said with much more bravery than Harry was sure he felt.

Hermione looked quite worried. "Ron, stop please …"

Madam Pince walked over to them. "Of course it was you making all this noise and causing a commotion around my books," She said, glaring at them quite darkly. "Get out!"

They were forced to leave.

"We can finish in the common room anyway," Hermione said, before Ron could begin cursing the vulture-like Madam Pince.

Harry wasn't completely angry. He wasn't looking forward to more Slytherin confrontations that would put Harry and Draco in more difficult circumstances. It was easier to avoid them in the common room. It wasn't that bad, really. The common room was certainly more comfortable.

"And she's not even that pretty if you really look at her," Harry caught Ron in mid sentence. He was making fun of Blaze, of course. "Well, I suppose for a Slytherin, she looks wonderful."

Even Hermione laughed at this.

"Pansy _is _worse, though," Hermione added. "It isn't usually Blaze who causes the problems. It is usually Malfoy and Pansy."

"Yeah, it is. Have you noticed Malfoy hasn't even spoken to us lately, and he's barely been making fun of Harry?" Ron said.

Harry shivered a bit at this. Surely they wouldn't discover the truth, but still, the fact that they noticed anything odd was weird.

"Maybe he has more pressing matters on his mind," Hermione said, rather darkly.

"What do you reckon?" Harry asked her, eyeing her in a rather annoyed way. Why did they care so damn much?

"Hermione and I think he might be following in his father's footsteps, you know, as a Death Eater," Ron said, in a low and dark tone.

Harry laughed openly at this but not in a pleasant way. They didn't know the half of it. They made too many assumptions about Draco's character, really. They had no idea what he had gone through that summer.

"No," Harry said, quite firmly.

"How can you be so sure? His family is rotten to the core, Harry," Ron said.

"I know … But well …" What could Harry really say? The truth was certainly not anything he could tell them. But he didn't want them concerned Draco would become a Death Eater. "We all know Malfoy is bloody soft and spoiled."

"That's true," Hermione said thoughtfully, ignoring Harry's language.

"Anyway, let's finish the essay," Harry said, changing the subject swiftly.

Draco had been relieved to see Harry at dinner that night. He was scared that the other boy had become very sick as he had not been anywhere in the castle all day. He had been followed around all day by Pansy and Blaze, along with Crabbe and Goyle, which had not really been fun.

And upon seeing Harry and his friends go to the library, Blaze and Goyle had taken the opportunity to harass them. Draco had said he was much too busy to bother teasing "Potter and his blood traitors and mudbloods". Of course, for the others, they went and did it anyway. Then Pansy had insisted on staying with him, and so did Crabbe for whatever reason.

After dinner, Draco headed to the Slytherin dungeons, having nothing better to do. It didn't seem like Harry would be up for much tonight, apparently swamped with homework and being followed around like a shadow, similar to his own situation.

"Draco, fancy a walk around the lake?" Pansy asked him, noticing his boredom.

"Not particularly," Draco answered, rather bluntly.

"Well, I do," Pansy said.

Draco considered. He had already finished a couple of his essays, and the rest were not due until later in the week. He truly had nothing better to do. And he didn't like being bored, because he thought of things like his father and the summer …

"All right then," Draco said.

With any luck Pansy would fall in the lake.

Harry, Ron, and Hermione had finally finished. Harry wasn't very tired, as he had slept very late. He didn't know why, but he fancied a walk. It would be nice to get some fresh air, and be sober at the same time, as an added bonus. He hadn't been in contact with Draco that day and he'd gotten used to staying up quite late anyway.

"Fancy a walk?" Harry asked them.

"Hmm … There is still some time. Why not, I suppose," Hermione said, though she sounded mildly surprised.

"I'm a bit tired, mate. You go on," Ron said, yawning.

Within five minutes, Ron went up to the boy's dormitory. Hermione and Harry got their coats and headed out for the castle grounds. It felt strange, really; he hadn't talked to Hermione properly in what felt like an eternity. It was probably good for him, really. He only now realized he had truly missed Ron and Hermione more than he thought.

They ventured out to the lake. They began circling for a bit before two figures came quite near them, giving Hermione quite a fright, as she gasped terribly. To Harry's horror, it was none other than Pansy Parkinson with Draco.

Pansy was smiling evilly at them. Draco was attempting the same, and he probably was doing it well, but of course, to Harry, Draco was cellophane. He could see right through the blond. Draco was as nervous as he was.

"Well, well, it seems Granger has settled her love triangle, _finally_," Pansy said, mocking them by bringing up the articles Rita Skeeter had written in their fourth year.

"Shut up, Pansy," Harry hissed at her.

"Ashamed of your own girlfriend, are you? Not that I can blame you, she _is_ a filthy mudblood. How does that make you feel, Granger?" It was Draco who said this, with such skill it was rather scary. It even hurt a bit knowing Draco was acting.

"Fuck off, Malfoy," Hermione said to him. "We weren't bothering you."

"Don't speak to him like that, mudblood!" Pansy raged rather stupidly.

"What are you going to do about it?" Harry said to her. "Sic one of your Death Eater friends on me?"

Harry and Hermione laughed even though it wasn't particularly funny.

"I'd watch out if I were you, Potter," Draco said. "Dumbledore isn't always around to save you."

Draco managed to make this look like the appropriate time to stalk off and did so, dragging Pansy with him.

_Well, this is definitely not how I wanted to see Draco today_, Harry thought miserably. And to top it off, Hermione was probably now certain Draco was up to something.

The next Draco was forced to go along with Pansy's rather radical story about how they had pushed Harry into the lake and only was saved by Granger. It was really rather funny to a degree, even though it was far from the truth. But Harry and he had agreed … do not disturb the universe, leave things be. And he would do that.

But Draco sent a note to Harry telling him to meet him in the morning before he forgot, and at breakfast, Harry made a quick signal to Draco to let him know he had gotten it. Draco smiled to himself. With any luck, today would be better. Since it was Sunday, Draco told him to meet him right after dinner.

When the appropriate time came, Draco went to the astronomy tower, as usual, this time bringing the invisibility cloak himself and waited for a rushed-looking Harry to come. And of course he did, as he always did.

"Hey, Draco," Harry said. "Are your 'friends' coming after me now?"

Draco smiled at him.

"Shut up, Potter," Draco said. "Fucking kiss me, half blood."

They both laughed, but as their lips locked the laughter faded as their passion heightened. They continued on … Draco felt all over Harry's body … his breathing deepened significantly … he could feel his own heartbeat … he could almost hear Harry's. They became more aggressive with each other …

"No …. Let's go somewhere safer, Draco, we shouldn't get caught," Harry said, pulling Draco off him. "The passage to Hogsmeade should be fine … just like before."

Draco nodded.

"Get under the cloak, then," Draco said, apparently not wanting to waste any time.

As soon as they entered the secret passage, Harry almost tore Draco's trousers off. They had been walking right next to each other under the invisibility cloak, both of them so aroused; it had been difficult to take. Harry wanted nothing more but Draco at that moment.

"Oh, Harry," Draco whispered, as Harry began stroking his penis. Harry did it in an ever slow motion at first, then speeding up the process slowly, giving Draco intense pleasure. And then, he sucked. "_Ahh_."

Harry continued pleasuring Draco … it caused him nearly as much pleasure to watch Draco in total ecstasy. But right when he felt Draco was going to climax, Draco pulled out of his mouth. Had Harry done something wrong?

"Not yet," Draco said quietly.

Draco turned Harry over and pulled down Harry's own trousers and threw them against the wall.

"Get on your hands and knees, Harry," Draco said, so gently he knew Draco wasn't going to hurt him, so he quickly did it.

He waited a moment and closed his eyes, as a rush of pleasure filled him as he felt Draco's tongue on his entrance. He truly must not still be alive … the pleasure was so wonderful and so unexpected. He and Draco had not gone past blowjobs until now.

"Draco …" He meant to say something about how good it felt, but he could barely manage a sentence. He just kept repeating Draco's name quieter and quieter.

And then another unexpected thing happened. Draco inserted his forefinger inside of him … a small rush of pain went through him, but as his body adapted, the pain eased away as Draco was being gentle as ever. For every tiny bit of agony, there was most intense pleasure Harry had ever felt, leaving a quite peculiar sensation. Unable to take it without doing something, Harry grabbed his own penis and began stroking it.

And Draco inserted two fingers … a bit more pain, a shower of pleasure … another finger, a shock of touch … there was a bit of pain, but Harry relaxed himself. The pleasure was flowing through him. After a few minutes, Draco removed his fingers from inside of Harry. He began licking Harry's entrance again.

"Liking it? Just stay relaxed," Draco said.

Indeed, Harry stayed relaxed.

Draco and Harry left the secret passage after an hour of pleasuring each other. They had not fully fucked yet, but Draco knew they would soon. Harry had offered him the same pleasure Draco had newly initiated, and Draco had loved it. But their friends would start to wonder where they were and become scared and suspicious, so they didn't continue. Draco took Harry to Gryffindor Tower.

"Keep the cloak, Draco," Harry said quietly, looking at Draco deeply. "Just hold on to it. You need it more than I do at the moment."

Draco nodded at Harry. He appreciated it so much. He cared so much for Harry … the specific feeling was hard to identify. But he knew he had never cared quite like this for someone ever before. He looked at Harry and kissed him one last time for the night.

"Bye, Harry," Draco said, and making sure no one was looking, unleashed Harry from the cloak.

As Draco left, he hoped to hurriedly return to the Slytherin dungeons unnoticed. But something quite terrible happened at the wrong place at the wrong time. He was passing Professor McGonagall's office when he tripped on his trainer's shoelaces. He went down, banging his knee terribly. Unfortunately at the time, Professor McGonagall was just leaving her office.

And Draco's head was outside the cloak.

"Mr. Malfoy! Is that … how dare you – tell me it isn't so, Mr. Malfoy!" She looked absolutely livid as though she was going to explode with anger.

Draco remained silent.

"Is that Mr. Potter's Invisibility Cloak?" Professor McGonagall mouthed so quietly, yet with so much anger it was truly amazing.

Draco had no choice. He would not reveal any of the truth to McGonagall. For one of his Slytherin pals, it would not be worth it. But for Harry, he knew it was. Telling McGonagall, knowing the side she was on, and knowing the side she surely _believed _Draco was on, he had no choice but to lie.

"Yes, Professor. I stole it."

Harry wondered why he had been called so late into Professor McGonagall's office. He had done nothing wrong; he couldn't imagine what it could be. But when he found out, a surge of anger and sadness spread through him.

"Potter, why did you leave your most prized possession on the Quidditch pitch?" Professor McGonagall seemed just as angry with Harry as with Draco.

"I … was being careless. I'm so sorry. I'm so glad you found him. Thank you, Professor," Harry said, not really _that_ convincingly, not that he really needed to be. But he felt it would have helped if he appeared a bit angrier.

"Very well. Do not let this happen again, Potter, I mean it," McGonagall said. "And rest assured Mr. Malfoy is being well punished."

Harry looked over at Draco who was sitting in the chair in front of McGonagall's desk and as she turned away, Harry gave him a look that was well, there was no other word for it … _loving_.

**Author's Note **What do you think? Thank you so much for the reviews, it seems you all are enjoying the story. PLEASE keep them coming. By the way, I'm changing the songs. I haven't used "Dying" or "Doll Parts" yet and I don't think I will. So I'm going to be using instead, "Reasons to Be Beautiful" and "Uncool", a song from Courtney Love's solo album. I may also use "Hold onto Me" at some point. By the way, in the relationship in this story, do you see where this is headed?


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter Eight

_Sometimes he comes to me_

_In the dead of winter, dead of night_

_He's all that I can see._

Draco would be suffering eight weeks of detention with Professor McGonagall but he honestly did not mind. He had done it with the best intentions for Harry, and in the end, somehow, that was all that mattered to him. It shocked him very much so; he had never been so unselfish before. It was quite scary, really, to Draco. He had never believed there would be anyone before that would compromise his love for himself.

Draco had been wondering exactly what that meant, but he honestly had no idea of the full implications. He walked towards the Slytherin dungeons to finally get some rest after being with Harry and the incident with Professor McGonagall when someone grabbed his shoulder and gave Draco a terrible fright. He looked back.

"Potter, are you trying to kill me?" Draco said harshly to an out of breath looking Harry, but he was pleased to see him.

"Draco, I'm sorry about that. You were really brave," Harry said immediately.

Draco did not respond immediately. He was sure Harry would thank him at some point. But it had really touched him in some way that Harry had rushed down to find him. He had called him brave. He really was quite fond of Harry …

"It was nothing, Harry," Draco muttered. "You would have done it for me."

"Draco … listen," Harry began and Harry was looking at him very meaningfully and deeply, and it made Draco quite nervous. "I … I know we haven't spent a lot of time together, but …"

A cat purred. Draco looked over and realized it was Mrs. Norris, who was now rushing away to warn Filch of students out of bed. They would be caught in an instant if they stayed put.

"Under the cloak," Draco said, and Harry and Draco went under the cloak once again that night. "Just come with me … to my dormitory."

Harry looked at him in utter disbelief if as if he had just announced the world was flat. He must have thought Draco was a lunatic for what he had just said as he blankly stared at him, not even speaking.

"Draco," Harry finally said softly and slowly. "Have you gone mad?"

"We'll have the cloak, you'll be under that. I just thought it'd be nice you know," Draco said this all very fast. "_To be with you_."

Harry looked genuinely shocked, but that paled compared to the shock Draco suddenly felt. He'd _never_ expressed his feelings in such a way. Before, it had made him feel weak and embarrassed. He had never been raised to tell anyone anything he felt for them. But Harry was different somehow.

"I guess you're right," Harry said finally, speaking as though he was trying to make the conversation more comfortable for them both. "I'll come. But we'll have to get up earlier than the others in your dormitory."

"Don't worry, Harry. It'll be fine," Draco said reassuringly.

"Why would I be worried? I'm with Draco Malfoy," Harry said, smirking at him.

Draco smiled to himself.

Once in Draco's room, Harry undressed, leaving nothing but his knickers in the dark and put his robes with Draco's things. Grabbing Draco they lay down together and Harry threw the Invisibility Cloak over himself, then went under the sheets with Draco and he held the other boy. It must have been an interesting sight if someone was to see them right then, as Harry would be invisible.

Harry felt more comforted then he had felt in a very long time. He was with the one person who now understood him more than other, the one person who had felt pain like he had, and the one person who cared more than any other. The one person who might have the same fate he did. The only person who ached like he had ached.

Sure, his friends were there for him. But none of them had been with him in the graveyard. No, Draco had not been there either. But his father had, and Draco did not want any part of that. It would be so easy for Draco to continue on Voldemort's side, but he wouldn't; he was braver than Harry would have reckoned.

No one else had felt the agony of the Cruciatus Curse either. Harry had taken it only a few times from Voldemort, but Draco had suffered it during the summer, and his father had called it – of all things! – training. It was a miracle Draco had not lost his mind. Harry would have surely run off, but Draco had endured it.

Harry once again thought of what everyone in school would say if they found out Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter had been in bed together. It would be terrible, but it was actually quite comical in reality. And Harry thought of the years they spent hating each other, wasting away precious time. Harry wondered how two people who now cared so much about each other could have ever hated each other.

Harry could see nothing now but the outline of Draco's body, and he held the blond tighter. His only security was with him. Finally, even with all that was on his mind, he could really sleep tonight.

It was past daybreak, but not much. Draco awoke luckily and noticed all the other Slytherin boys were still sound asleep. He gently touched Harry's shoulder affectionately, not necessarily trying to wake him up. He didn't want to end their time together yet. But he knew he had to. He kissed Harry lightly on his forehead.

Harry shook a bit and he knew he had woken Harry up. But at least he had not been woken up roughly and Harry had not shrieked. Harry opened his eyes slowly, and for the first time, Draco took a very deep look at Harry's eyes. They were so beautiful. As green as a toad, but they shone so beautifully.

"Morning, Malfoy," Harry said. "I'm tired."

"Shh," Draco said softly. "Let's get dressed."

They dressed quite quickly and very silently, and they threw the cloak over themselves fast and rushed out of the dormitory and out of the Slytherin dungeons. They were laughing as they left, on how silly they had been to even worry about getting caught. As they walked downstairs to where they would be forced to part, Draco thought of the events in the previous night.

Who cared if he had detention? Who cared if he'd have to see much more of Professor McGonagall then he really wanted to? Who cared if his father didn't care about him? Because right now he was with someone who he thought really _did_ care. And he didn't know if he had ever truly had that confidence in anyone before.

"Harry … I want to tell you something," Draco began, not looking at Harry, even though he could feel him breathing, as they were both under the cloak.

"Yes, Draco?" Harry asked who had obviously sensed something noble was coming.

Draco took a minute. "Last night was one of the best nights of my life … because I was with you."

It wasn't what he had intended to say.

"It was like that for me, too," Harry wasn't great with words, but when he meant to express himself, no matter how simple it was, he would be expressed. "Draco … it's early. Let's take a walk."

And Harry grabbed Draco's hand. He would not let go.

Harry and Draco had walked around the lake several times now, barely talking really, just enjoying the gift of having each other. They briefly discussed things but at the same time nothing at all, and they were both conscious of this. No one was around this early, so they had not bothered with the cloak. But now it was getting later in the morning, and the sun shone very bright.

"Under the cloak, again," Harry said finally. And Draco did, not looking happy about it.

"I guess it's time for us to go back to the Great Hall," Draco said quietly. "It's getting pretty late in the morning."

Harry nodded slowly, not really wanting to admit this. He had felt more alive that night then he had since the night in the graveyard. Since then, he had felt emptiness … a lack of ability to fix anything … and before he could lose his mind, he had just decided it was not up to him to save the world as everyone expected. This thought _had_ kept him sane, but in the end, he had felt emptiness inside of him like no other he had felt since he had entered the wizarding world.

"Bye, Harry," Harry heard Draco say, though he was lost in thought. Draco unleashed himself from the cloak, and Harry managed a goodbye and watched Draco leave him to reenter the castle. And the emptiness he had felt before he began spending time with Draco came back to him like a rush.

Blaze and Pansy were already at breakfast, and the moment they saw Draco, they called him over. They looked as though they had just been speaking of him, giggling away. The way they had both called his name in a sing-song tone of voice made Draco cringe. And it really _was_ quite annoying the way they had called him together. But as he had felt quite hungry, he reluctantly sat with them.

He did not smile. Draco Malfoy was not one to force fake emotions, and even being a Slytherin, he was an honest person in several respects, for the good or the bad – even if he was no fearless Gryffindor compelled to tell the truth _always_. Lately he hadn't even tried to hide the fact that he did not particularly like spending time with Pansy or Blaze, or for that matter, any of his Slytherin friends.

Before, it had been nice, knowing there were people who looked up to him and admired him. But then he realized they only loved him for _what_ he was, not _who_ he was. They admired him because he was a Malfoy, a natural leader, a handsome upstanding member of the wizarding community. And that was it.

Then there were his parents. Deep down somewhere, he knew his mother cared for him. But she had not been there for him when his father tortured him; she had been a part of the problem. He would never forgive her for it. And his father had never loved him unconditionally, always expecting nothing less than perfect. And then there was the Dark Lord. Since his return, the Master had always come first with his father and mother.

But after all that, there was Harry. Harry Potter, the boy who lived and all that. The boy he had hated for four years. Somehow, someway, now, Draco cared for him more than anyone. And Draco was sure somehow, if Harry hadn't been there to save him, he could have overdosed on a muggle drug purposely to commit suicide. He honestly didn't think he'd be able to take much more otherwise.

Draco began eating quietly thinking of Harry. He barely ate really. As hungry as he was, the moment he put food in his mouth he practically felt full. His mind was on other things.

The next week went by terribly slowly for Harry. The overload of homework increased immensely. He barely had time for his Quidditch practice or relaxation. And there had been no time for Draco all week. He felt slightly bad, but he was sure Draco was in the same position.

But when the weekend came to Harry once again, the first thing he did was write a letter to Draco. It was hard to write a letter to such as a character as Draco. Hermione and Ron were easy to write to. But to write to Draco was different. But so he wrote:

_Dear Draco,_

_This week has been pretty long at school. The homework is pretty unbearable, and if Hermione wasn't here, I really don't know how I'd get through it all. How have you been? I've thought about you a lot._

That doesn't sound so bad, Harry thought to himself. He continued writing.

_Let's meet tonight. Bring your broom._

_Love,_

_Harry_

Harry had seriously debated with himself from using 'Love' or 'Sincerely', but he decided given their rather intimate relationship, it was fine. And so Harry gave the letter to Hedwig and sent her off. And he waited for a response, which surprisingly, came right back with Hedwig.

_Dear Harry,_

_I'll see you there and I have something exciting for us to do._

_With Love,_

_Draco_

Harry was shocked. 'With Love' seemed so odd coming from Draco. The fact that it did meant a lot to Harry. He wondered just what to make of it. How much did Harry mean to Draco?

Draco had a plan for Harry tonight. It was very different than anything they had done before. He hoped Harry wouldn't resist. It would be strange for him as well, but he thought it would be fun to do it with Harry.

So, at the usual time, Draco arrived at the top of the Astronomy Tower and quite bored waited for Harry to arrive. And when he did, he looked as usual, as though he had been in quite a rush. Draco grinned.

"Harry," Draco said. He had missed him so much. "You look so tired."

And he truly did. The dark circles under his eyes were much more visible than usual, and his hair looked even more untidy then usual.

"I am," Harry said. "But I wanted to see you."

There was a moment of silence where they just watched each other. And this time, it was different. Draco did not take Harry swiftly into a violent kiss as they had so often done before, but he slowly approached Harry until he could count every single eyelash of his and then slowly gave him a rare passionate kiss.

"We're going to London," Draco said finally, not being able to stop himself grinning broadly as he looked at Harry's look of confusion. "The wizarding sections of London. My parents have taken me there before. But I've never gone without them. I thought it'd be nice to go together."

"Hell, let's do it, then. How many times could we have gotten expelled by now?" Harry said, grinning as well.

They both laughed, and as Draco and Harry departed off on their brooms, Harry leading, Draco had never felt so alive.

The trip to London had not taken too long. Draco knew where they were. He remembered it well. They were in a wizarding section of London the size of a small suburb. Draco remembering seeing all the brilliant toy and candy shops and forcing his father to buy him everything he wanted as a child. They used to take him there twice or so a year when he was a child but had stopped once he began attending Hogwarts. Now they only took him to Diagon Alley. But Draco remembered it vividly.

It looked similar to Diagon Alley, really, but much larger. They were shops everywhere on one street, and then on the next, there would be several large houses. And on the next, there was a large library. And on the next, there was a clinic. And on the next, there was a shopping centre.

But that wasn't what Draco had wanted to show Harry. Draco took Harry's hand. They turned onto the next extremely crowded street full of young people and blazing music and drinking. The club scene. Draco looked over at a shocked Harry.

"Never knew wizards had their own clubs, Harry?" Draco said, smiling to himself, quite pleased.

"Never really thought about it," Harry admitted.

"But we're going to a very _special_ one," Draco said with a smirk on his face.

"Oh God," Harry said.

Draco laughed.

"You'll enjoy this … well, hopefully more than the Yule Ball." Draco laughed harshly.

"What was that supposed to mean?" Harry said defensively, sounding very attacked.

"Everyone remembers the extremely uncoordinated Harry Potter," Draco said, sounding as though he was truly enjoying himself. "At least here no one knows you."

"Shut up!" Harry said, but he was smiling.

"Keep your hood up," Draco said turning onto a new block. "Ah … and here we are. I've never been here myself. It's a gay nightclub."

Harry was shocked by their surroundings once they entered the night club. Half the men inside were half-naked, and there were tons of drunken men. There were shining lights everywhere that hurt Harry's eyes after a while coming from the disco balls. It was extremely crowded, as the many people danced to the blaring music.

It looked similar to the muggle night clubs he had seen in the past in movies and such, except these had men lap dancing all over each other and men who seemed to have only just met leaving together. Many people looked so high they could barely walk. Harry was sure he would have been terrified if Draco had not been with him.

Draco turned to Harry, and suddenly had a very professional look on his face and imitated an English nobleman. "Care to dance?"

Harry took his hand, grinning, and they went onto the dance floor.

Draco took control over this situation, and Harry liked it that way. He was very nervous. Draco almost forced himself onto Harry, and grabbing Harry's back with his hands, and slowly, he began lap dancing with Harry. Harry tried to move naturally at first, but becoming very embarrassed was reducing his performance.

"Relax, Potter," Draco said, sounding more impatient. "Everyone here is too drunk, stoned, horny, or all three to care how you dance."

"Why don't we get a drink?" Harry suggested, hoping this would relax him a bit.

Draco forced himself and Harry to take three drinks of brandy before returning to the dance floor. He felt much freer, for a lack of a better word. Harry looked much less nervous now. Draco felt as though there were much less worries now, and he grabbed Harry's hand and they returned onto the dance floor.

Harry was being much more aggressive now, but he was responding better to the dancing, whether it been from the alcohol or it being a second attempt. It didn't seem to matter though. Harry didn't look half as tense as he did before. He looked as though he was genuinely enjoying himself.

"Much better, Potter," Draco said.

And so they continued for what must have been two hours, only stopping for drinks. By the end of their last dance, it was very late and they were both quite lightheaded from all the drinking. Draco felt quite exhausted and didn't think eh should fly back. Harry looked as though he was going to pass out.

"Harry," Draco managed to coherently say, as they sat together in a few seats away from the dance floor. "Are you okay?"

"I'm so bloody tired," Harry said, sounding weak. He was sweating terribly. "I can't fly back, I can't do it Draco."

"Me either," Draco said. "I say we rent some place for the night and fly back early tomorrow. I really need a few hours of sleep."

Harry was unaware of when and how he had ended up at the "Nightly Resort". All he knew was that sometime upon leaving the nightclub he had thrown up three times and had been carried by Draco and he had fallen into a state of half-consciousness. He had remembered hearing voices and such but he didn't remember anything clearly until Draco had undressed him and he had opened his eyes. They were in a small hotel room with one large bed. Draco was next to him, lying down.

"Draco … thanks," Harry said. "How you manage everything is beyond me."

"Hush, Potter," Draco said, with his eyes half open. "Just go to sleep."

"Draco," Harry whispered to him, looking directly at him.

'Yes, Harry?" Draco said faintly.

"Hold me."

That's Chapter 8. I'll try to update soon. I appreciate the three reviews. When I say where this story is headed, I mean where the relationship has gone so far. What will happen at the hotel? Will they make it back to Hogwarts in time for there to be no suspicion? Find out in Chapter 9.


	9. Chapter 9

**Author's Notes: **Thank you to all my reviews! I am so glad you all like this! I really love writing it. So I sit here, in fourth period, as I begin writing Chapter 9 while watching Goblet of Fire on DVD. Didn't plan on starting until weekend, but it is spring break and I'll be busy.

Chapter Nine

_Love hates you._

_I live my life in ruins for you_

_And for all your secrets kept._

Harry awoke with a shake, and the first thing he felt was a terrible splitting headache. He didn't seem to think it was possible he could have slept much at all. It felt as if he had _just_ fallen asleep minutes ago, though he had never felt so tired in his life. He was exhausted.

Harry opened his eyelids and there was Draco. The boy looked like he had gone to hell and back. He looked very sick and pale. His hair was completely ruffled and disordered, and all the color was gone from his face.

"Draco … What time is it?" He had meant to ask him if he was okay, but he hadn't.

"It's just past seven," Draco explained, his voice weak and soft. "But I paid for a portkey to get us to Hogsmeade. We don't have to fly."

Harry was extremely grateful for this. The idea of flying had never been more unappealing. He wanted nothing more to continue sleeping. He, at that point, did not care if the whole world was to find out he and Draco had spent the night together because he felt like such shit. He wanted to ease the pain.

Draco helped him up a bit, walked him to the bathroom, and helped him wash up. But right when Harry felt he was feeling better, he felt a terrible sick feeling in his stomach and ran to the toilet, but did not make it. Harry threw up terribly all over the bathroom floor.

"Damn you Potter," Draco said. "That's on the bill you know."

But Draco suppressed a smile. He seemed to be enjoying this.

Harry moaned in pain.

"When is the portkey going to be ready?" Harry asked faintly, still on his hands and knees, very sick.

"Ten minutes. Get up." Harry glared at him, but Draco continued, rather sympathetically, or as sympathetically as Draco Malfoy could be. "I feel like shit, too. But we have to go back. You know we do."

"I hate loving you sometimes," Harry said, before he had realized what he had said. He looked up at Draco. He had never seen Draco looked so shocked before. Perhaps Draco didn't feel the same. Or perhaps he hadn't expected Harry to feel the same. Or perhaps he just didn't expect Harry to say it.

Draco did not respond immediately, but waited a moment. Finally, some color returned to his face and he spoke. "I know what you mean."

And that was that, and Harry did not speak again, but with Draco's help, got up, and dressed himself in a hurried fashion as to not miss the portkey, neither speaking of what had just happened.

Draco and Harry had literally run back to the castle together, under the cloak, as fast as they could, not caring if their legs occasionally showed, as they wanted to get to their dormitories. Draco prayed no one had noticed them being missing. It was still quite early, after all.

As they entered the castle, Draco took Harry quickly in his arms. He had been shocked by Harry's slip-up in speaking of his feelings for Draco. Draco imagined that was the only way it could have happened. Harry wouldn't have – at least not then – sat Draco down and deliberately told him. Draco knew he felt the same way, but it took Harry saying it for him to come to the complete realization of his own feelings.

Draco kissed Harry rather lightly. A goodbye, but not a long one. As soon as he awoke, he would want to see Harry again. But this time, he vowed to remain sober. They would have to do something innocent and fun … of course, that was almost impossible. It was part of their compatibility. The crime of passion, all their secrets kept.

Draco left Harry at Gryffindor Tower, feeling extremely dizzy and lightheaded, rushing for the Slytherin dungeons. He wanted to be in his dormitory, dozing off into a dreamless sleep. He would let nothing stop him. As he quickly muttered the password, a rush of relief poured over him as he found a nearly empty common room. He rushed upstairs and as he fell onto his five-poster bed, he really, really slept.

Harry had slept fine, but he had remembered someone, most likely Ron, trying to awaken him, and Harry threatening to hex them. But then later he would wonder if that had just been a dream. When he awoke, it was around dusk, and there was a letter sitting right next to him.

Of course it was from Draco. It asked him if he was feeling any better, and to meet in the same place tonight. Harry swore after the events of the night before he would never drink again. It was an overstatement, yes, but he was in no fit mood to drink again tonight.

Harry got dressed rather quickly, as he was feeling quite hungry. He proceeded down to the Great Hall where Hermione and Ron ran over to him and were panicking about him. They fretted for a moment on why he had slept all day, and Harry had simply said he was tired, knowing he had given a pretty unconvincing answer.

"Harry, Ron felt your head earlier, you were burning up," Hermione explained. "I gave you a cooling charm and then you went right back to sleep."

"That must be why I slept so much, then," Harry said. "I had a fever."

Harry smiled to himself at the oddness of partial truth in that statement. He ate rather quickly, as he had obviously been much hungrier than he had earlier anticipated. The more he ate, the better he felt. Finally, the insufferable pain was easing a bit more. Some of the color returned to his cheeks.

Later on that night, Harry accomplished some long-forgotten homework with Ron and Hermione. He felt quite relieved, as he had concluded before he would more than likely never finish it. But now, it felt absolutely wonderful having accomplished that task. To many, finishing homework was such a simple task. But right now, he felt he could do anything.

"Good night," Harry said to Hermione and Ron, an hour before meeting Draco.

"I reckoned you wouldn't be tired, mate," Ron said, sleepily.

"Well, yes, he woke up quite late," Hermione said.

And they went to bed.

Draco had not enjoyed detention with McGonagall in the slightest bit. He had hoped he'd be writing lines or something ridiculously pointless as that, but he did not get that privilege, not at all. She had had him peel gum off the bottom of the desks of the classrooms on the fourth floor … and without magic.

Draco had thought he wouldn't make it to the meeting with Harry. And as he had no way of contacting Harry, he became quite worried. He became working steadily faster, reaching a peak. But it was in his nature to still somehow make his work absolutely perfect. Somehow, he accomplished it in time. He could not miss Harry.

It ten minutes before midnight when he finished and Professor McGonagall let him go after a very thorough inspection, in disappointment that she had nothing unsatisfactory to report. Even so, it was not in her nature to deny fairness at the same time, and she allowed him to leave. Having had no proper time for a quick clean-up, he rushed to the Astronomy Tower.

For the first time, it was Harry waiting for him, examining his fingernails, looking pleased and bored. Harry had stolen his role. Ah, bloody Harry …

"Very funny," Draco said. "But those who mock Draco Malfoy only mock themselves."

Harry laughed out loud at this. "Where were you, Draco? Honestly, I was worried," Harry said, still smiling brightly, but Harry Potter could not lie to him. He really had been. It was a bit embarrassing, but Draco admitted it.

"Detention, remember. I actually finished as quickly as I could," Draco said casually. He had meant to add 'for you', but Draco was never that affectionate to people unless he was under the influence, and even then it was rare.

"Ah," Harry said quietly. He made it painfully obvious he felt so guilty for Draco being caught. "Was it bad?"

"It wasn't fun at all, no," Draco would have liked to lie, and say it had just been lines, or something stupid, but he found he too, was incapable of lying to Harry, even for something as miniscule as that. "But it's fine, Harry."

"I'm sorry, Draco, I should have told her …"

"It's fine, Harry …"

"You wouldn't even be in trouble …"

"Be quiet, Harry …"

"It's my fault …"

"SHUT UP, POTTER!" Draco finally said in an outburst. "I said it was fine, and it is!"

Harry didn't speak. He looked at Draco rather confused. Draco understood. It was nothing more than a simple clash of personalities really. Harry was the kind of person who apologized and made it clear how he felt … and Draco was not, not necessarily. Draco never _said_ he was sorry, he _showed_ it. And Draco's emotions were difficult to read, they took time to be easily recognized.

"Where are we going, Draco?" Harry finally asked quietly.

"I don't know, but I have to say whatever we do, we stay sober. I can't take another night like that," And Draco smiled at Harry. He was not angry at Harry at all.

"Good, me either," Harry said, smiling back. "How about we take a stroll in London again, but that's it, just a stroll?"

"All right, Harry. But we have go to Gringotts first," Draco said. "Good thing you brought two brooms … Who'd you nick the other one from?"

"A school broom I decided to get and just keep for a while," Harry said. "Just in case. I'll return it in a bit. I figured you might have forgotten or something."

"I didn't forget, I had no time."

Another dead silence.

"So why do we need to go to Gringotts?" Harry asked.

"Well, Harry, do you think my muggle money comes out of thin air? I have to trade it with the goblins," Draco explained a bit impatiently.

Draco smiled evilly at Harry, but then kissed him on the cheek much more romantically then he normally was.

Harry was freezing terribly as Draco and he walked down Diagon Alley and approached Gringotts. Draco had rushed him while they had been flying, as even though Gringotts closed late, they had less than an hour to get there. When they arrived, they had less than ten minutes' time to spare. Harry felt so cold his muscles were burning.

"Damn, Potter," Draco said, and quite casually, as if it was nothing, took off his own jacket and put it around Harry. "Don't bloody turn into an ice cube on me."

"Thanks, Draco," Harry said, as they walked into Gringotts.

The goblins looked pretty harassed as Draco made them switch out his galleons, sickles, and knuts for muggle pounds. But as unwillingly as they did it, they still did the job absolutely perfectly.

"About time," Draco said. "They took long enough."

"Draco!" Harry said. "Don't harass the workers."

"Could be faster though, _my God_," Draco said as they left.

"Let's just go through the Leaky Cauldron, then," Harry said.

"No, Potter," Draco said immediately, as though there could have been no such dumber suggestion.

"Why not?" Harry asked.

"The innkeeper knows both of us," Draco said simply. "We'll fly again."

Draco and Harry secured their brooms with anti-stealing charms behind a shop and began strolling around muggle London under the Invisibility Cloak. They would have to at least until they found themselves some muggle clothes. So taking off the cloak, they entered a late night shopping center. The people there looked shady enough, so they were able to play it off as though they had just come from, or for that matter, on their way to, a late night costume party.

Draco found the men's clothing department with Harry. Though he had never admitted it to anyone before, he had always had a strong fondness for muggle clothing. Of course he had never been allowed to wear them and he had never asked to for that matter. But he had seen muggles a lot from time to time, and thought they were quite nice.

Draco could tell Harry thought it was funny they were finally in a circumstance in which Harry knew much more about the situation then he did. Harry, still, did not make it into a big deal. He was browsing through jeans quickly, looking for a size for Draco. Draco was actually anticipating dressing up as a muggle.

Shirts … there was such an assortment of muggle clothing. Harry found him a rather nice, casual collared shirt that was rather expensive. To go with it was a pair of faded blue jeans. Draco smiled at Harry in a playful way. Draco Malfoy in muggle clothes. Certainly something to remember.

Draco tried on the clothes in a rather untidy, small fitting room. There was a cracked mirror on the side wall in which he examined himself. It really did look quite nice on him … A perfect fit. He preferred it to wizarding clothes, which he always thought everyone looked the same in. Draco honestly didn't mind being conceited … he looked _sexy_.

"Let me see, then," Harry's voice called, and Draco, trying to look humble and unsure, walked out of the fitting room and walked to Harry, who was smiling. "Wow, Draco. You look good in anything."

"I know, Harry. _Must _you rub it in?" Draco said, winking at Harry with a smirk on his face. "I want a new coat with this, too."

When Harry got dressed in his own outfit, he knew he would not be able to pull it off as Draco did. But Draco had that natural charm, and had twice as good composure and poise as he did. But Harry still thought he looked decent. He was dressed in a long sleeved, striped, button and collar blue shirt along with black jeans. Draco and Harry purchased their new clothes right after Draco selected a rather trendy, comfortable jean jacket.

"Where shall we go?" Harry asked.

"I have this idea. It's quite funny really," Draco said and Harry became scared. Draco's sense of humor wasn't exactly normal. "I want to get my ear pierced."

Harry actually laughed. "No, seriously, what do you want to do?" Harry said, still giggling. Draco looked serious. It was a bit much, really, taking a joke like that that far.

"Do you think I'm joking, Potter? I want my left ear pierced. Don't you think I would be even more _dashing_?" Draco asked slyly.

Harry eyed Draco. He was quite shocked. Draco Malfoy with a muggle fashion statement was so awkward. But knowing Draco, he would make it seem absolutely cool. He'd have some lame excuse about how he was truly mocking muggles or some cock and bull story. But Harry smiled. It would make Draco look very _dashing_ indeed.

"Well, all right then."

Draco was actually scared, but of course he didn't show it. He sat in the uncomfortable chair with perfect composure making small talk with the worker. She was a punk-looking teenage girl who looked barely older than them and tattoos all over body. She seemed to be annoyed that she had to work so late.

"Yes, well, when you have a kid at eighteen you got no choice," She remarked at some point. "But anyway, you ready?"

She did not wait for a response as she prepared the proper tools to perform the piercing. And then, waiting for Draco to look at her she took the needle to his ear.

"One … Two … _Three_."

A sharp pain ran though his left earlobe. But the pain lessened momentarily. Draco tried his best not to flinch. It had not hurt terribly, but it had not been pleasant either. He pulled himself together rather fast.

"That wasn't so bad," Harry said, smirking at him. He knew Harry knew he had been in pain.

"It looks good, Draco, it does!" Harry reassured Draco as they talked as they as they walked down an empty London street. Draco had been moaning about how awful his new earring looked, but Harry kept telling him it looked good, as in his opinion, it truly did.

"It looks like someone took a blade to my ear!" Draco said, sounding much more panicked then normal. At Draco's horrified look, Harry laughed out loud.

"Oh, Draco, when Voldemort's taken over, you'll be worrying about whether you combed your hair that morning!" Harry said, and Draco too, laughed at this

"You really like it then?" Draco asked sincerely in a tone begging for the truth.

"Yeah, I really do," Harry said firmly.

"Good. I can't wait to show it off," Draco said, and his arrogant attitude returned quicker than a ray of light.

"Ah, Draco, _Draco_," Harry said. "I think that girl had it in for you."

"What are you talking about?" Draco asked, cocking an eyebrow.

"You have a wad of gum in your hair," Harry said, looking at Draco completely seriously.

"WHAT?" Draco exclaimed, looking as though he was facing ten Death Eaters.

And then Harry burst into hysterical giggles.

"Very funny, Harry," Draco said, though rather playfully, and he crossed his arms. "Oh how lovely."

Draco stopped suddenly a few moments later. He grabbed Harry's arm, and Harry could feel him shaking. It was the rare fear in Draco, but he could feel it. Harry looked into Draco's pale eyes, and they were full of fear. The horror of seeing Draco in that state had to be worse than whatever it was.

"Draco," Harry whispered. "Draco, what is it?"

But Draco did not respond. He stood staring, looking horrified. Harry grabbed his shoulder. He began shaking him. "Draco, please … What is it?"

"A dementor is here. Here, in London. And near."

Draco could feel its presence. He had grown up around dark magic his entire life, and with this he knew, simply knew, when a form of dark magic was near him. And near them, in the streets of London was a dementor. He could feel the terrible chill running through his body already. And all the happiness in the world was being slowly sucked away … Everything he had been feeling since he had spent time with Harry …

He saw it … a black-hooded creature … and Harry grabbing his hand … his world was slowly fading away … before, in their third year, it had not been as bad, but now … his eyes were half shut, where was Harry taking him? He could hear Harry's voice but it was fading ….

_He was three and his father beat him for talking to a muggle in the village …His father was performing the Imperius Curse on him for the first time … Professor Moody was turning him into a ferret …He had lost to Harry Potter in quidditch again … His father was screaming at him for being second to Granger in exams …_

"Draco, please wake up!" It was Harry's voice, sounding desperate, booming into his ears, and causing him to shake and become conscious. Draco blinked. He was right where he had last been, on the streets of London, only now he was lying on the ground. It was still night. "I couldn't do a spell. We're outside of school. And the Patronus charm is too powerful and the Ministry would detect it. The smaller spells they won't because it's such a busy area, but if I had even tried the Patronus … I took your hand I ran with you until you became unconscious. Then I carried you. We escaped, but we have to get back."

"Harry, I'm sorry," Draco said. He meant it, too. He had failed Harry. "I should have stayed strong."

"Draco, it's okay. Can you get up?" Harry asked firmly.

"I feel so weak, Harry," Draco said and he meant it. He felt as if all the strength in him had vanished. "I can't fly back, I'm sorry."

Harry lied Draco down in the small inn he had found closest to where they had left their brooms, as he had to retrieve those first. It was quite cheap, really. But Draco had been quite ill. Harry had to put his arm around Draco's shoulder to assist him in walking. He was so shocked.

Harry quickly helped Draco undress and pulled the covers over Draco on the grungy bed. He kissed Draco on the forehead as Draco became comfortable in the bed. Harry took the muggle alarm clock by the bed and set it to seven and then him, too, undressed. Then he joined Draco in bed.

"Are you sure you're all right, Draco?" Harry was so worried about him.

"Yes, Harry. I just need to sleep. But do you think the Ministry knows yet?" Draco asked quietly.

"I don't know. I think we should send a letter tomorrow to the Ministry. I could have gotten rid of it, but we can't use magic outside of school. We would have been in quite a mess," Harry said, sounding unsure of himself. He had seriously debated whether to use his wand when the dementor came after them.

And as Harry lay down, he wondered. Why had Draco reacted so badly to the dementors? Yes, Draco had terrible experiences behind him. But Harry did as well. Before, Harry would faint at the mere sight of dementors, but after dealing with them, he had become stronger towards them. Was that why he had managed?

Draco arrived at school the next day safe and in perfect health condition. But at breakfast time, there was uproar. Everyone was speaking of the dementor sighting in London. And not only that, but it seemed as though there were no missing dementors in Azkaban, so they were coming from another source, from somewhere else. The ministry had not retrieved it, but one wizard who spotted it had gotten rid of it.

Draco was scared. He knew this was all the work of the Dark Lord. His father had mentioned that The Dark Lord would do something like this eventually. Draco could not think of what to do. Perhaps he could owl his father and he would tell him something. But whatever he put in writing would have to sound very good.

Draco knew very well why the dementor had affected him the way it had. People like Harry were very conscious of what had happened to him. In no way was Harry a traumatized person, and in no way could he be. He was so_ aware_ of what happened in his life. But it wasn't in Harry's nature to let it destroy him. Draco was different.

Draco had been raised to not show his emotions. Showing his emotions would only make him seem weak, of course. Or so his father had told him. And when bad things happened to him, he had learned to shut them out, to put them in a separate place. He would not speak of it or reminisce on it.

So when the dementor attacked him the previous night, all the terrible memories of his childhood and of his present that he had spent his life forgetting came back to him with a jolt, ripping him apart. Harry was conscious of everything that he happened to him, accepting it all, so he wasn't as badly affected. But Draco was forced to in a minute relive a past he had worked so hard to forget.

And Draco understood. His father had told him to shut out the memories which would make him weak. But it was that morning Draco understood that putting the memories away was what had made him weak. Telling those who loved him of the horrors he had lived did not make him weak; it made him brave.

**Author's Note: **So my story has been totally edited thanks to my lovely beta, who I dedicate this chapter to. She has a wonderful eye for things, really. I appreciate all the reviews, **Please keep the reviews coming**. In this chapter, the storyline moves a bit. Harry and Draco are going to be going through a lot in a short space of time.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter Ten

_When the fire goes out_

_You better learn to fake._

_It's better to rise_

_Than fade away._

Harry had done a lot of thinking. He was absolutely convinced the dementor had been a product of Voldemort and it shook him quite a bit. He had spent all his time since meeting Draco forgetting of all that and ignoring it and putting it away in his mind and simply not thinking of it. But now things had started to happen again. And he would be pushed into it.

Harry honestly continued trying to forget of it … But of course he couldn't. People were looking at him more now, questioning him, perhaps now asking themselves if Harry had been telling the truth as Cornelius Fudge had discredited him. Harry didn't like dealing with it all. He had spent so much time shutting it all out.

Hermione and Ron were onto him like a magnet like any moment Voldemort would pop around and kill him if they weren't with him. It was bothersome after a while. He didn't care about any of it. He wanted out. After a while, it caused him a lot of depression.

But luckily, Draco was still around. Draco always understood somehow. Even if he didn't exactly say so, Harry could always tell that he did. Draco was the one person he felt one hundred percent confidence in these days. He wished he could still say it about Ron and Hermione, but he really didn't know if he could.

Only Draco understood how sick Harry was of being the hero. Everyone wanted Harry to have all the answers in every situation like this. It was as though Harry was expected to be invincible and play the hero role regardless of how he felt or his feelings. It was insignificant. Harry just had a role to play.

"Harry," Draco said on one particularly chilly night that they met. "You don't have to be anything you aren't for me."  
It was awkward for Draco to say something like that, but he did of course have his moments like that. He only seemed to say it when the person on the receiving end already knew which Harry supposed Draco figured made it fine to say. In a way that was true. In a way it was still very much like Draco to keep an element of surprise going.

"Draco, please don't leave," Harry said in an almost desperate voice later on that night. They hadn't gone anywhere at all. They had stood together in the Astronomy Tower, watching the stars, doing absolutely nothing. "Please don't leave me."

Harry had sounded so sad and so desperate and much more so than he had intended to. He wanted to lie down and cry. Harry knew he couldn't continue running away from his life anymore. He was going to have to face it all and it scared the bloody life out of him.

"Harry, I'm not going anywhere," Draco said, sounding surprised as Harry's minor breakdown. But Draco reacted well. He went over to Harry and gently kissed him and then lied him down and held him. "Please, Harry, _please_ be okay."

It was Draco's turn to sound desperate. And once again it was so unlike Draco. But Harry understood well this time. Harry was the first person who Draco confided in one hundred percent as well and Draco could not lose him either. It was as if they were one; if one part became broken the other would not function.

"Draco, Draco," Harry began whispering very low. "Make love to me."

Draco put his hand on Harry's chest and felt him. Harry was freezing and Draco felt so warm … And Draco continued until he reached his neck …. Draco kissed Harry gently on the neck … Harry turned around and kissed Draco passionately on his lips ever so softly.

Draco put both his hands back on Harry's chest but moved down this time … He reached Harry's waist and snuck a hand down Harry's trousers … He touched Harry's member gently and stroked once … Just _once_ …. And then Draco pulled Harry's trousers off ….

Draco put his mouth on Harry's member … Harry closed his eyes and enjoyed the pleasure of that moment … He rid himself of all thought … No Voldemort, no Death Eaters, No unhappiness …. Joy, happiness, love, peace …. Draco. Draco would always be there, wouldn't he?

Harry was turned over …. He felt Draco put a finger inside of him … It was orgasmic … And two … And three … And then four … Four was the last number, Harry knew it. And then there were no fingers inside of him.

"Draco … Draco … Draco … Draco," Harry couldn't form a sentence. All he knew was that he loved Draco Malfoy more than anything and he wanted him more than anything. Draco Malfoy loved him for what he was. "I want you."

And Draco's own member was inside of him …. There was a bit of a rush of pain, yes … But it wasn't as much as the intense pleasure. It was like agony and ecstasy clashing, but the ecstasy was winning out somehow. Harry felt as though in trance, it was like getting very high. He felt like he on such a high level. Nothing could bring him down now, not when he was with Draco.

Draco was going ever so slow … The pain was vanishing rapidly … It wasn't an issue … And Draco went a bit harder … A bit harder … A bit of pain returned … The pleasure enticed … Harry was in heaven tonight. The pain drifted away as he became used to the sensation … The pleasure was beyond any pleasure he had felt.

And Harry looked up at his dear love. Draco was in a pleasure unknown to the world as well. His eyes were closed … Looking at earthly things was simply not right when in such a realm of pleasure. So Harry closed his eyes once again and simply enjoyed having the deepest and most secure connection that any two human beings could experience together.

And Harry came.

Draco Malfoy could never remember being so worried about anyone else before. Draco had not been raised to care about other human beings that much. It was always look after yourself most. Draco honestly felt now, somehow, there was someone who he loved as much as he loved himself. And somehow it was actually returned. There was no doubt in his mind that Harry Potter loved him. But Harry Potter was not happy. And somehow through this, Draco was not happy either.

He watched Harry in their many classes everyday. He was so unhappy. All the color was drained from his face. The temporary happiness he had seen Harry in when they had been together was gone. Harry was almost unrecognizable. But what Harry didn't realize was this time he would face nothing alone. Draco would be there no matter what …

"Mr. Potter, are you paying attention?" It was the voice of Professor McGonagall. "I am speaking to you."

Draco shot an attentive eye over to Harry's direction.

"Sorry, professor," Harry spoke weakly and quietly.

"Potter, are you ill?" Professor McGonagall asked, and she looked authentically worried. "You look very out of color."

"Yes, professor, may I go to the infirmary please?" Harry asked, and as Draco had seen him do before, he was begging.

"Yes, Potter, please do," Professor McGonagall. "I would not want ill students in my classroom."

Harry got up and left. Draco waited … Perhaps two or three minutes … And he asked to use the restroom. He quickly ran and headed for the infirmary. Upon arrival, Harry was not there. Harry was nowhere in the area. Luckily, for Draco's sake and Harry's, the bell rang for break a few moments later.

Draco looked in the only other place he could imagine Harry and being. He looked in the Astronomy Tower. And of course, there sat Harry. He was watching the outside blankly. Draco approached him and put a hand on his shoulder.

"I knew you would come," Harry said. Draco let go of the grip. "No, hold me Draco. Touch me, Draco. Feel me, Draco."

It was strange. Harry was acting very peculiar. Draco wasn't even sure how to respond to it. But Draco put his arms around Harry's neck and looked to the outside with him.

"Harry, I love you," Draco said, praying it would help. "I really do."

"I know you do, Draco," Harry said. "I want to leave. With you."

Draco was shocked. What was Harry talking about? Leave? To go where? What on earth was Harry trying to say?

"What are you talking about, Harry?" Draco asked him, completely puzzled.

"Let's leave, Draco. Let's run off somewhere, anywhere. Anywhere we can be together and people won't judge us or hate us for it," Harry said looking at Draco sincerely. Harry was not joking at all. Harry was, however, being absolutely unrealistic and borderline insane.

"Harry … _Harry_," Draco began, not even knowing where to begin on why that could not happen. "Our lives are here."

"I know, Draco. But I'm sick of _this_ life! What the fuck did we ever do to deserve this?" Harry was screaming now. Draco did not try to stop him. "I'M ONLY FUCKING HUMAN!"

Now Draco was mad. Why was Harry yelling at him? "Well, Harry, there are some things here that are worth staying for," Draco said quietly though rather angrily.

"Really, like what?" Harry asked in a rage.

"Like me," Draco said, staring Harry in the eye.

And Draco walked off. He went back to Transfiguration and got his bags quickly and sat alone outside the castle and ate a small snack and lied down and basically felt sorry for himself. No one came near him when he was in that kind of mood, not even Pansy or Blaze. So Draco just lied there looking at his watch until the end of break. And then he was off to another class, to be miserable. He would listen to another stupid twit of a teacher rant on about a subject that he really could not possibly care less about … That is, unless the subject was Harry. Then he would be more attentive than ever. Of course, that wasn't going to happen.

"God," Draco said to himself, and now imitating Harry. "I hate loving him sometimes."

Harry met Draco again that night. He felt bad for yelling at Draco earlier. The first thing he did was apologize. But then he could not take it anymore. Harry cried and cried into Draco's arms.

"Draco, I'm sorry, I'm really sorry," Harry had begun saying. "I love you, I love you. I love you so much."

"It is fine, Harry," Draco said. "Let's go get high or something. I need a relief from all this."

"All right then," Harry said, hugging Draco and holding onto him tight. "Let's get high then."

Draco did not know what time it was. Draco did not know what year it was. Draco could barely remember his last name. Or maybe he did, but the thought of even thinking about something as silly as thought made him laugh. And laugh he did.

All he could think about was those little joys in life he had just realized he had never really paid any attention to. Draco looked down on the ground. There were aunts crawling all around. And Draco counted them …. One …. Two … Three …. Fifty … Thirty …

"Ah!" Draco screamed quite loudly. An ant bit him. He had been so unprepared for such a sensation. Draco looked at Harry. Harry was in a complete daze, staring at the moon with his mouth wide open.

"Draco … it's so bright. But if you look careful … You realize something. There's more than just cheese up there," Harry said, or at least that's what Draco thought he said. Draco was busy looking at the alignments of the bricks on the walls. But Draco was so cold …. Freezing …..

Draco was really enjoying hearing these rapid thumping sounds in his ears … Draco wasn't exactly sure where it was coming from but he kept hearing it over and over again, it was quite wonderful. It was like music almost. Draco looked at Harry again. He began counting Harry's teeth … So bright …

"Smile, Harry, smile," Draco said. "Smile."

And Draco counted … One … Two … Three … Seven … Four ….

"What the fuck were we on, Malfoy?" Harry asked Draco once they were back at Hogwarts the next afternoon, which luckily was a Saturday.

"Just some acid," Draco said, as though it made it all right. "I didn't think the effects would last that long."

"Yes, well, they did. I better go and find Ron and Hermione before they bloody have a heart attack," Harry said irritably.

"They probably already have," Draco said, half laughing.

And Harry left Draco with a light kiss on the lips.

And things went normal the next few days. But Draco vowed to never trip on acid again after what had happened before. He actually felt lucky they survived. He literally could not remember almost anything except flashes and minor feelings until after perhaps noon even. And how they managed to not get caught was another affair all on its own. An affair he literally had no idea about.

Harry got a bit sick the following day, apparently feeling nauseated but as it was Sunday he simply went down to Madam Pomfrey and had her give him a strengthening potion and he was fine. They hanged out for a bit after that, but they remained absolutely sober and abstained from sexual activity because of sleep depravation. It was then that Draco learned you truly can be too tired for sex.

But it was a very cold day that something so peculiar happened in which Draco never even imagined. It was so cold that day. It must have been the coldest day of the year thus far. Draco felt relieved to stay in the building that day since there was a lack of any outdoor classes, in which Draco was very grateful for. Draco rushed down to the Potions dungeons quite early that day as it was always quite warm in the dungeons which was usually an inconvenience, but in this case was to an advantage.

Snape was not there when Draco arrived but most of the pupils were. Draco gave Harry an evil snare for the mere fun of it. He threw Longbottom's ink bottle on the floor, leaded by a secret smirk by Harry. He then, rather fashionably (being Draco), took his seat between Blaze and Pansy, who were fighting on who got to sit next to him today. It was always how he usually settled the pointless, rather tiring fight. Still in the end neither was ever satisfied.

Snape never came in. The bell rang. This had never happened to the class before. It was highly unexpected and the entire class was quite shocked. For the first few moments, no one spoke out of fear and the likeliness that Snape would come barging in a right state. But the minutes passed by and no one entered. Only Hermione Granger looked worried.

But finally, someone entered. But it was not Snape.

Harry almost cried out in shock. He would have never expected such a thing to happen. Snape had not come. It was two dark cloaked figured with large hoods with hidden faces. They immediately pointed their wands at the pupils. The screams and chaos were drowned out by Harry's near panic attack. All the time he had shut things like this out …

And Hermione's arms were around his in fear. And Harry snapped back into himself and heard a voice scream a spell at Lavender Brown who lies now unconscious on the floor … Then a bellow from one of them screaming for silence … And it was so quiet.

Harry just stood there as everyone stared at him, presumably assuming he was going to do something. A terrible chill was running through his body and he was shaking horribly. The fate of the situation was barely believable, and Harry was still trying to take in the facts of the matter. All he could do was stand there with his eyes wide open.

Harry looked over at Draco, who looked almost … _contained_. He didn't necessarily look relaxed in any way, but he didn't look as panicked as anyone else. He was much paler than normal, yes, but he wasn't as panic-stricken as anyone else, simply sitting, watching. He would not catch Harry's eye.

The Death Eaters stopped moving around so much and idly pointed their wands at everyone. Still, no one spoke. Hermione shivered in his arms, though she wasn't as bad as before. Ron was shaking on his other side by him. The Gryffindors were all huddled together on one side, horrified, and the Slytherins on the others. Perhaps a few Slytherins looked bold and unafraid, such as Crabbe and Goyle, but for the most part, they were just as terrified.

Harry wished he could see who they were. He knew it must be two of them that he had seen at the graveyard … One of the ones who had watched what should have been his death … And all the terrible memories came back to him …. Cedric's dead body …. The fetus that would become Voldemort … Wormtail with his new silver arm …

And one of the Death Eaters performed a spell. Their wands simply disappeared. It had not been a summoning charm … They had simply disappeared. Harry had not understood it; in fact he had not even heard the spell properly. But this had made many people scream with more terror. They had lost what little guard they had had left. And then the Death Eaters did another spell, but Harry did not see what they had performed. And then they left.

It was apparent what they had done. As soon as the Death Eaters left, half of everyone ran for the doors. It was locked. Every form of transportation to leave in the room had been locked. No spell could remove the lock, either. It must have been really strong dark magic.

Pandemonium broke out, the silence long forgotten. Draco, for the first time, looked very scared. He looked the same as he had the night they had gone to the town Lucius Malfoy owned by Draco's house. Lucius had nearly caught them then. Now … Well now, no one knew what was going on. People were banging on doors, screaming for help, crying … Everyone was losing it. And there was nothing any of them could do.

Draco looked at his watch for the hundredth time. Night had fallen. It was nearly nine at night. No one had come to rescue them. They were still stuck in the Potions classroom. People had become seriously panic stricken. Draco supposed this must be what it was like waiting to die.

There was nothing to tell them they would ever get out... But then again … His father was Voldemort's secondhand man. He would not leave him to die here … But would he? Would he for Voldemort? But Voldemort would want Harry for himself, too. They wouldn't starve to death, no. Something was bound to happen soon.

He had wanted to talk to Harry. But he couldn't. Right now … There couldn't be a worse time. Draco knew that. But he was _sure_ Harry didn't care about this. It was Draco to be the one who would have to care and have to keep his sanity. He would have to be twice as strong as Harry.

Harry, Granger, and Weasley were together in a corner of the room. Everyone was together in their little circles. Draco was with Blaze, Pansy, Crabbe, and Goyle together. Crabbe and Goyle themselves had had no idea of this. Blaze and Pansy were much more frightened then they appeared, as were Crabbe and Goyle. But they all just sat there, hungry, waiting.

Draco always brought snacks with him to his classes. He had brought some crackers, some chocolate … But he did not share any of it with his Slytherin pals. In the front of the room was Snape's office, and thank God for them, he had a small bathroom. He looked at Harry for two seconds, two focused seconds, went to the bathroom, left him some food and went back to his Slytherins. Harry went right to the bathroom and got it.

So Draco waited and thought. Snape had probably always been a double agent. This had probably been a latest scheme. But why had no one came to get them? Had the Death Eaters taken over Hogwarts or something? With Dumbledore there … no, not possible. But why hadn't they come to release them yet? Draco was scared, he really was.

It was midnight. And yet they waited alone. Draco was so tired. He lied down on one of the Potions table. He had intended to lie there for a moment, but he did not. Draco fell into a deep, dreamless sleep.

That's Chapter Ten. I told you a lot would happen. What do you all think? Enough angst? To my reviewers … thank you so much!


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter Eleven

_In your endless summer night,_

_I'll be on the other side._

_When the water is too deep,_

_I will ease your suffering._

Harry awoke with a start the next morning and found Hermione right next to him. He wondered how long he had slept. For a moment he forgot where he was or how he had gotten there. As he left the world of sleep he opened his eyes and found his glasses. He secured them on and looked around. Everyone was asleep. Harry looked at his watch. It was a couple hours past dawn.

The reality of the situation once again dawned upon him. No one had found them. And Harry felt very hungry. He was more scared now than he had been since the start of the incident. Why had no one found them? Would they be left here to starve to death? Harry couldn't bear the thought.

Harry tried to return to sleep but he couldn't. He looked around. Most everyone was asleep on the floor or on the tables or even sitting on the chairs. Harry got up and went to the sink in the bathroom. He tried getting water but nothing was released. Harry obsessively pressed the taps but nothing happened. Another rush of panic went through him. Surely a rescue would be here soon …

"Harry," said a small voice. "We're going to be okay."

Harry turned around a bit shaken as when he had checked everyone had been asleep. It was Draco. It was nice hearing Draco speak to him again. Harry tried to suppress a smile but he could not. Somehow, he felt angry.

"How do you know?" said Harry in an angry voice. "None of us do."

Harry felt so hopeless. At the moment, there was no one else to take his anger out on. Somehow, Draco still looked calm. His composure had not changed at all. He had most likely expected Harry to be upset and panicked. It was Draco who could hide his feelings, not Harry.

"I'm to become a Death Eater, Harry," Draco said calmly. "How quick you are to forget."

And Draco gave Harry a terrible smile that reminded Harry of the Draco he had known before. Harry thought he understood it though. Draco was bitter. Draco didn't have all the answers. It was Draco's job to pretend he did.

"You're not going to be a Death Eater, Draco," responded Harry slowly after some time.

"Why do you say that?" Draco asked, as though expecting a certain answer from Harry.

"Because I love you," Harry said firmly, looking Draco dead on. "And if we die in here I want you to know."

There was a silence.

"But I am afraid love may just tear us apart," Draco whispered.

After Draco's brief chat with Harry, Draco had returned to sleep. When he awoke, everyone was awake. There wasn't a lot of chaos, which is what Draco had expected. There was silence. No one spoke much. It seemed much time had past since anyone had tried to inflict any spoken hope into anyone else.

Everyone was simply waiting. Speaking to each other was much too painful. Instead there was a agonizing silence that said more than anyone's spoken words could possibly say. Weasley and Granger were actually holding together in a corner. Draco had never seen them show such affection to each other openly. Perhaps they felt at this point it did not matter much.

"I'm so thirsty," said Blaze. Blaze was one of the hardest things to watch. No one in the room was in much pain as her. It had been a horrible sight around noon on the second day. No one had known this about Blaze. She suffered from an incurable wizarding disease. She had never told anyone at school … Not even Pansy.

And so it was near noon. No had really eaten anything except perhaps snacks they had had with them. Blaze had seemed tired the first night, but nothing more. But at noon the next day she was sweating terribly and looked as though she was in a lot of pain. She lied there motionless looking as though every moment was a fight for breath.

"Blaze, what's the matter with you?" asked Pansy. She sounded irritated, but it was how she acted when she was worried. Blaze did not respond. She had put her hand on her forehead faintly and had passed out. Moments later, several people, Pansy in front, rushed over to her. "Blaze, wake up!"

It was a few minutes before she awoke in a lot of pain. No one knew what had happened or why she was in so much pain. She did not speak at all at first as she looked around and realized what had happened to her. Pansy felt her and yelled that Blaze was burning up with fever. Someone had run to the cabinets, looking for aspirin. None of them could use magic, and they could only pray there was some king of muggle remedies available for the symptoms she was showing. Still, she did not speak.

Finally, she mumbled a single word. "Water … Please."

The one thing they could not have given her. Tears dripped down Blaze's eyes. It was clear how much pain she was in. It was very obvious her unsuccessful attempt to hide her pain, to make it seem as though she was going to be okay. Even Pansy saw right through it. Blaze needed help …. Real help, nothing they could give her. Draco silently hoped a rescue would come soon, because Blaze's fever was very high. He felt her forehead. She was burning up.

Draco and Pansy carried Blaze onto one of the tables and gave her one of their bags and cushioned it as much as possible, giving it to her as a pillow. Draco actually didn't want her to sleep. He had a fear if she was to sleep she would never awake again. He told her to try to stay awake and alert. This made her cry even more. Draco almost had an urge to force her to drink her own tears.

It was so painful watching her cry. Draco had always been taught to never cry. He was supposed to be a man, not weak to such emotions. But at that very moment, he felt nothing other than the need to break down and cry. He wished he could run and hold Harry but of course he couldn't. It was a terrible emptiness inside of him that he found unbearable and unattainable. It was a terrible void inside of him. Draco did not feel too hungry or even too thirsty, but somehow, he felt as though he was already dying. How much longer would they endure the suffering?

So it was a few hours later that Blaze lied there still, motionless, barely awake. Draco kept stealing her glances, making sure she had not fallen asleep. In the end he had nothing else to really do. He was hearing people weep ever so often and this was more painful to him. At random points in the day, some people began going crazy throwing things against the doors, ceasing at all costs to find a way out. People had breakdowns – minor to not so minor. Draco simply watched it all. The more people broke down the more he felt he was reaching the point where he to would eventually have his own.

"Pansy, Draco … come here," said Blaze softly and faintly, lifting her head a little. Draco and Pansy walked over to her quickly. She sighed and took a deep breath. "There is something I need to tell you."

She dropped herself again. She closed her eyes briefly and then slowly turned to her side, not looking at them anymore. She looked as though she was adjusting herself on her side. She was sweating frantically now. Before she could speak at all, she began crying softly. Neither Draco nor Pansy said anything.

"There is nothing you can do for me," she said very softly, but Draco had heard her very clearly. "There are things I never told you. Things only a few know. Things I never told any of my friends. I should of, but I didn't want you to feel sorry for me. I thought I'd be okay. But now this …" she trailed off.

"What are you talking about?" Draco had asked sharply, demanding Blaze to explain herself.

"I have a very rare wizarding disease, since I was two. There isn't a cure, I'm afraid. I have stayed on treatment my entire life that has kept it from getting out of control but I have to take it three times a day … And if I don't, well you're seeing the effects," said Blaze, and she laughed a mirthless laughter that was disturbing.

"Hang in there, please," Pansy said softly, she was crying, hiding it terribly. Blaze laughed again mirthlessly as though Pansy had said something terribly childish. "Blaze, _please_."

Everyone surrounded around Blaze, and Harry stood stubbornly by Draco. No one cared to notice this though, as they were watching someone who was in limbo between life and death. It was the evening, and Blaze had fallen into a deep unconsciousness. Her breathing was quite irregular. Everyone knew she had little time left. Everyone was quite depressed, not just over her, but on the overall situation.

A lot of people were completely panicking over the fact that the first person was dying before them. As the hours passed by, it scared them more and more one of them would be next. None of them were getting any stronger. They were all hungry and very, very thirsty. The idea of being in a room where people were dying scared the hell out of most of them.

Harry was so angry. He felt like he wanted to just kill someone as he had so much rage. He was locked in a classroom and had no way of getting out. And Harry felt a bit of the old him, pre-Draco returning to him. If he could be the hero right now, he would be. He couldn't stand watching his friends and others suffer like this. He didn't want to die like this. But where were Dumbledore and the other teachers? Why hadn't they come for them? Harry could only imagine. Had they been captured, too, perhaps abolished? Were they trying to fight the dark magic and break through the classroom? The possibilities were endless and it was terrible to think about it. But if Harry wanted to stay semi-sane, he had to try to rationalize things.

"Who can do CPR? Please, save her!" screamed the voice of Pansy. She was jumping up and down having a panic attack. It seemed Blaze had stopped breathing …

And Dean Thomas was performing CPR on Blaze while everyone watched very closely. Harry could not remember watching anything so clearly. She couldn't die, not like this. She had to live. _Please let Dean save her_, Harry begged.

Harry watched frantically. It was true he had never even really talked to Blaze. Draco, however, knew her well regardless of how much she annoyed him. He cared whether she lived. Therefore, Harry also cared a lot. Either way she was a human, deserving of a life. It was so terrible, Harry couldn't bare it. He looked at Draco. He was so pale …

"Blaze, can you hear me?" Dean said.

There was no response.

"She's breathing, but barely, and she still isn't conscious," Dean said. "I don't know if she has much time left."

"Don't you bloody say that!" Pansy yelled.

Dean did not respond. He obviously understood that she was in denial. Blaze was her best friend. Draco did not speak at all. He looked miserable. Harry longed to hold him, but of course he couldn't. Harry looked at him sympathetically for a moment but Draco may not have seen it.

And then there was the explosion.

Draco didn't remember exactly what happened. All the walls around them just exploded and broke down. And then came in Ministry workers led by Dumbledore and McGonagall. It all happened so absurdly fast Draco thought he must have been hallucinating. But he wasn't. They were being rescued!

It was finally over! And Blaze … she would be fine … Hopefully. Draco was anxious to be told what had taken them so long. Whatever it was, Draco expected a very good reason. He had seriously thought he was going to die at points. And Harry … They could see each other again. But what had happened?

"Everything is all right! Please do not panic!" bellowed Professor McGonagall. She herself ran over to Blaze and gasped. "Madam Pomfrey!"

The whole story had been explained over dinner ironically. Snape had been a double agent, and not in their benefit. He had been working on some of the ancient magic in the school and had let the Death Eaters in. Apparently they had been trying to siege Hogwarts. Dumbledore and the others had won out with the help of the Ministry. Finally, everyone believed Voldemort was back.

The purpose of locking them in was to keep Harry in particular out of the way. The spell was intense dark magic and the room had been blocked off. The entire dungeons had been sealed with dark magic that had taken much to breakthrough. Dumbledore was however, certain that they had not intended to even keep them there very long, just until they had Hogwarts under siege.

As for the wands, it was simple magic one of the Death Eaters had performed. Dumbledore returned the wands to them himself. Harry wanted to run away now that he had his protection returned. He already planned to meet Draco tonight. This time, however, he did not want to leave Draco. This time, maybe he couldn't.

The current state of Blaze was unknown. Apparently, the lack of medicine she hadn't taken during the period of time they had been trapped had done some possibly irreparable damage. She had been transferred to St. Mungo's where they would do all they can. The next day they would be allowed to go see her … At least the ones who had been trapped with her. Now that Harry knew everything was being done for her, hated to admit it but his lack of caring was gone. It was though he no longer had to.

The one person on his mind was Draco. He wanted to be with him. He needed him to take him somewhere away. He didn't want to think about any of it. He wanted Draco Malfoy. He wanted to fly away and never come back, never return to any of it.

Draco waited at the top of the Astronomy Tower as usual for Harry. Harry came right on queue as he always did. Harry looked very pale and quite miserable but at the moment he saw Draco the color seemed to return to his face. He rushed over and hugged Draco. Draco felt such warmth he hadn't felt since before the "siege". Finally, the emotions he had cherished before were returning.

"I was so scared, Draco," Harry whispered, still in his grasp. "Scared we were going to die in there."

"Harry, it's all over. Everything is just fine," Draco said calmly patting Harry on the back. "I missed you. You were there of course, but I missed being with you like this."

Harry kissed him. Draco expected a rare sort of gentleness but that was not what he received. It was a rather fierce kiss against Draco … It almost hurt. It was though Harry was still convincing himself he was with Draco.

"I love you," Harry said.

"I know," said Draco cynically. "I am quite irresistible. But I have the power to resist."

Draco's twisted form of morbid humor was something only he himself could most likely understand in such circumstances.

"You can't resist me," Harry said, smiling a bit.

"Is that what you think, Potter? You were always _so_ arrogant," Draco said sarcastically and timidly.

"No, Malfoy, that's what I _know_," Harry said smiling wryly.

Harry took him in another kiss and Draco falling on top of him, forced them both onto the ground. Cuddling rather violently like animals, Draco took Harry in several gentle kisses up Harry's forearm. Breathing deeply, Harry rolled onto his side and Draco threw his hand all over Harry's back, looking for nothing but Harry's skin, the warmth it provided him. He had been so cold before.

Draco began whispering to Harry. "_Harry … My Love … Cometh to me … In you I taste God … We shall never be apart_."

Draco leapt off of Harry. He didn't want to go any further, at least not now. He wanted to go somewhere with Harry. He wanted to go somewhere very far away. He knew the time would be soon where the horrible unfair destiny he would face would dawn on him and he never wanted to face it. He wanted to go somewhere, anywhere. It didn't matter as long as Voldemort or even Dumbledore could never find him. He just needed to be with Harry. He was willing to leave all of it behind, he realize how much it really didn't matter.

"You were right before Harry," said Draco, remembering when Harry had wanted to just leave before. "Let's get the hell out of here."

Harry looked at him in an abstruse way. He looked genuinely stupefied. He had not expected this obviously. Harry smiled. "Do you mean it?"

"Yes, we can't stay here. Love _will_ tear us apart," Draco said in a shockingly shaken tone. "Let's fly away."

It was odd that Draco literally meant that.

"The countryside … London, I know you liked muggle London," Harry said smiling at him.

"Yes, but they'll find us there. Let's go to the countryside," Draco said. "But I've been thinking."

"What have you been thinking about?" asked Harry in a melancholy way.

"I want to take you somewhere you should have gone a long time ago," Draco said looking a way for a moment. "Godric's Hollow, where your parents lived, you'll like that."

**Author's Note: **CHAPTER ELEVEN! No I didn't forget you all. I so hope you like this. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR REVIEWS! And to one of my reviews, yes I love how I ended Chapter nine too.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter Twelve

_Crash and burn,_

_All the stars explode tonight._

_How'd you get so desperate?_

_How'd you stay alive?_

It would have been quite difficult for Harry to accurately describe an account on what had happened. It seemed to have all happened with no pause, no moment to process surroundings, just a past-paced train going down a quite long winding road. Harry wondered if he was dreaming at points. But he knew it was all too wonderful to be a dream … Even a good one.

Once they had decided to leave, the two of them had both returned to their proper dormitories. Harry didn't speak to anyone much. He was putting things together. He wouldn't be taking everything, only the essentials. He left most everything behind, as extra baggage would be a burden.

He did have some doubts. He was frightened. He wanted to be with Draco, definitely. Even so, it would be difficult leaving everything behind. Hogwarts had been his home for over four years. It was hard realizing what was worth it … Home or Draco? But Harry knew there was much more to it than that.

Everyone was down in the common room as Harry packed some clothes into his bag in a hurried fashion. Once he was finished, he searched the room for anything he was forgotten. He knew very well he hadn't, but he was choosing to linger. He still found himself in a rather pensive state of mind. He wasn't ready to leave just yet.

He considered writing a note to his friends. He wanted them to know he was fine. He had already planned in his head to be writing to Ron and Hermione constantly, but now, running that in his head, he wasn't sure if that'd be such a good idea. Keeping in contact with them would make the runaway only more painful and he knew it. He would write one letter, addressed to them both. He pondered what he would say to them. What could he possibly say to explain everything?

There was nothing he could really say. Ron and Hermione would be shocked by his behavior. They would be angry with him probably. He knew he couldn't blame them. He wasn't truly thinking too much of the consequences of his actions at this point. That was usually Draco's job, but in these desperate circumstances, neither was. But he still owed it to Ron and Hermione to tell them the truth.

He used Ron's own quill and parchment and began writing, or at least, he attempted to. He didn't know to express himself. No matter what he wrote, it wouldn't make sense. His actions were irrational, and even Harry realized that. He wasn't thinking of Ron and Hermione at all. Somehow, it didn't shock him. A few months ago, he would have taken them with him, but they had been slipping out of his life lately since Draco came in.

He knew he still loved them. He really did care so much about them. In a way, he was helping them. Voldemort would be after Harry and he therefore would take the attention off Hogwarts. He was sure Ron and Hermione would be all right. He just wasn't sure if he would. He needed to get away.

Tears slipped down his face unknowingly as he let out the most honest emotions onto the parchment. Harry had never been great at writing. Draco would be great at this. He wasn't good at being too profound. He was just being honest. The letter, in the end, was much longer than he would have ever imagined. As he read it, he thought it was complete rubbish. It would have to do. He had to meet Draco. He was already running late.

He took one last look around, took his bag, and reread the letter, though he had no intentions of editing. It read:

_I don't really know how to explain why I'm doing this. A lot has happened since school began, I'll tell you that. It involves things you'd have never imagined me doing before; things I still have a hard time accepting. I don't have real reasons, but, I have decided I can't do this anymore. I can't live this lie here pretending things are okay. I'm leaving. I don't know when I will be back, but it will be safer here without me I'm sure. I love you all so much but I can't stay. Thanks for everything. If I could change this, I would._

_Please don't try to find me. Please don't worry. I will see you guys again when this is all over._

_Harry._

It was poor, really. It looked quite cruel in fact. But it was no bother now. He wasn't going to make any changes. It would never be right. None of this would. But he was going to do it and that was all there was to it. At that, Harry left with his cloak over him.

Even as he went to the Astronomy Tower to meet Draco, he couldn't help but feel a bit depressed. He was sure he'd be fine after a while. He'd deal with it. There'd be more positive coming than negative he was sure. He would miss Ron and Hermione more than anything. With any luck, though, it wouldn't be too long until he had the opportunity to see them again. He would have to simply wait and watch for things to unfold. He wasn't sure how much he liked it. He someone had the impression, though, that Draco had much more of a plan than he did.

Harry wondered blankly about Blaze. He wondered if there was any news on her yet. If there were, Draco, naturally, would be of the first to know anything. She was in a very bad state back in the classroom, but all things considered, she had survived at most and was at St. Mungo's. Harry hoped she would be all right. No one should have to die like that, for something so stupid and cruel.

Harry walked up to the top of the tower and found Draco waiting.

Draco had tried very hard to not put too much thought into what he had been doing. He simply packed. He did it in a secretive matter, no one saw him. He thought leaving would be simply. It had gone so simple so far. But then of course, something had to come ruin it.

"Draco! Oh my God," it was Pansy. She looked awful. He had never seen her so pale and upset. "Blaze is gone."

Draco didn't quite understood what she meant. "What?"

"Draco, we've lost her," she cried, falling into Draco's arms. Draco didn't quite understand at first. Blaze couldn't be dead …. She had been taken to St. Mungo's, she was under great care … How could they have lost her? No, surely not ….

"Pansy, what are you talking about? Blaze, no, she's fine," Draco said reassuringly, perhaps more just to his own state of mind. But Draco also knew that Pansy wouldn't be hysterical quite like this for nothing …. Could it have happened?  
"I just got an owl from St. Mungo's. They've been trying to treat her, but she went much too long without her medication. The disease took her body over and she could only been kept alive for a few more days and in a lot of pain. They let her go."

The words were full of emptiness. And it sunk in to Draco. Blaze really was gone, wasn't she? She was dead …

Draco didn't say anything. He wanted to scream it wasn't true, anything, but he knew it would mean nothing. Blaze was gone. A girl he had known for four years … A fellow Slytherin … the girl he had tried to save but couldn't. He couldn't believe it was happening. Could it be a fact that Blaze was no longer alive?

Draco sat down. He was sweating and shaking. It would be all right. He needed just a moment to understand what was going on. Blaze had been taken to the hospital and now … Now, she wasn't alive. Was that what Pansy was attempting to tell him? Yes, of course it was. She would never have been this upset otherwise. Blaze was gone and she wasn't coming back …

"You're sure?" he said quite softly, silently begging for some kind of mistake.

"Of course I am!" she yelled at him, sounding angry now, and she stormed out. Draco attempted to call her back unsuccessfully. Draco didn't like being alone at a moment like this. Blaze was never coming back …

Chills were running through his body. But why did he feel so bad? It wasn't as though he had very many fond memories of Blaze; he had never taken the chance to get to know her very well. In fact he had found her quite unappealing … Yes, so there was no real reason to be upset. Or at least Draco tried to convince himself of this. It didn't help very much.

Draco was lost in thought. He had tried so hard to do what he would have done before Harry. He tried so hard to simply shut out the memories of the incident in the classroom and run away from it. Now, the memory shined brighter than anything else possibly could. Someone's live had been taken because of it. Draco felt so panicked and upset and so … _unable_.

And he remembered what he was actually supposed to be doing. He should have left by now, headed to meet Harry. He had been caught up in a crisis, though, and Harry hadn't even been on the mind for once. A fellow peer of his was dead. He would have to be the one to tell Harry. Suddenly, Draco felt so angry. It was so terrible …so unfair … The incident should have _never_ happened! Now so many would suffer because of it. And they hadn't even intended to kill Blaze.

Draco thought to himself, closed his eyes for a moment. He shouldn't be sitting there, terribly upset. It was a war after all. These things would happen and he would have to accept it. Of course it wasn't pleasant. But it wasn't too much of a surprise. Draco had immaturely assumed Blaze would be fine as she had been hospitalized. Childishly, he had barely given the idea of her not having a full recovery much thought.

Draco contained himself. He simply needed to keep it out of his head for a while, and he would be all right. I mean, what difference did it truly make? Draco was leaving; he was going to get away from it all. He wasn't going to be seeing Blaze anyway. I mean the sickly truth of it was horrible, but it really didn't affect Draco's reality either way. It was a horrible state of mind to be in, and Draco knew this, but it kept him a bit calm.

Draco looked at his watch. The minutes ticked by and he needed to go see Harry. It would be odd if he was suddenly late. Draco quickly collected his things, took one final look around the room he had vacated in for over four years, and walked out. It was time to go. And still, Blaze was on the mind …

He shut it out. What would his father say if he saw him, sulking over someone like this that wasn't himself or perhaps a family member? But then, why would what his father thought matter to him anymore? That was a life he had left behind … But did it matter? The method in which one was raised would always affect someone in some way or another. Of course, none of this would have happened if it wasn't partly due to his father …. This he was sure of … But there was nothing he could do.

Harry stared at Draco, trying to smile. He didn't look the same somehow. He looked very pale, unhappy, and perhaps _sickly._ Harry rarely saw Draco like this, it didn't look right. In reality, it looked quite frightening. Harry didn't like it at all. There was most definitely something wrong, and Harry wondered how soon he would know, and just how bad it was.

"Draco, what is it?" he asked, sounding most likely much too frightened by his tone.

"Nothing, Harry, nothing," he responded, and now he was smiling widely, as though nothing made him happier than that particular situation. "I can't wait to take you to Godric's Hollow."

"Right …" Harry said awkwardly, and he looked at Draco suspiciously purposely, hopefully leading to a confession. But it was obvious Draco pretended to take no notice at all. But it only made it more obvious to Harry that something was certainly wrong. Draco, however, didn't seem to think Harry needed to know at the present. Of course, Harry was persistent. "Draco, something's wrong."

"Mount your broom, Harry!" Draco said cheerfully, as though he had not heard him. It was so strange. Draco would normally show anger, not false happiness. Yes something was wrong. Something was very, very wrong. "Harry, what are you waiting on?"

Harry had been in a pensive state for a moment, and then he looked at Draco. He would have to play along for a while, he supposed. He suppressed a smile, and did as Draco told him to do.

"I'm ready," Harry said.

Draco flew much ahead of Harry, not talking to him at all, unless giving a directional order. He had definitely shut earlier events out of his mind, but he somehow remained a bit uneasy. He felt he needed space to himself, and without saying much to Harry, he somehow managed to get it. He felt this was justified. There was no need for conversation anyway.

Draco thought a lot on the ride to Godric's Hollow. He knew exactly where it was. In fact, according to his father, he had been there once. It was years ago. In fact, it had been just a few short months after the death of the Potters. Obviously, Draco held no recollection of the experience. Apparently, his father had taken him to collect evidence of the Dark's Lord's downfall …

But he had known where Godric's Hollow was for years. His father had had maps around his house. And whenever he spoke of the downfall of the Dark Lord, he always began in the same way. 'It all began in a town five miles out of Brixton …" and so it went. Draco, fascinated with the dark arts as a child, always vowed to visit it one day to see for himself what could possibly bring something as powerful as the Dark Lord to oblivion.

But why had no one ever taken Harry to his former home? Why had Harry never _asked_? Had it been Draco, he would have ensured he would have visited it. It held a former life that Harry remained ignorant to. This in itself was unfair. His parents' home was there …. Their burial spot …. Their things …. _His_ things …

And now they were right above the town. Draco began slowing down a bit and he knew that Harry must know now where it was. It was quite dark down, but they had a great view of the town. Draco saw the tiny church from above … The houses (He began to guess which might have been Harry's) …. The courthouse …. The park …. And of course, perhaps the most important place, the cemetery. It was so normal from up above. It was a very small muggle town. The mysterious murder of the Potters had probably been the most interesting thing to them.

"Are you ready, Harry?" Draco finally spoke to Harry, calmly, and unthreateningly. "This is your past."

Harry couldn't believe he was actually there, in his hometown. Draco held his hand. It was so dark no one could see them. Harry just surveyed the area as Draco took the lead. He didn't speak at all, but simply looked around in complete awe. It looked so beautiful to him …. But of course, he couldn't imagine a situation in his mind where it wouldn't. He always knew it would be apparent to him.

Draco stopped in the middle of the road and unfolded a sheet of paper from his pocket and showed it to Harry quietly.

The former residence of the deceased of Lily and James Potter lies on 143 River Road.

And ironically enough, Harry looked at the street Draco then pulled him onto and It was River Road. So this was it, he was finally going to see the home of his parents. Harry shut his eyes momentarily. He was beyond excited, but he was nervous and anxious and somehow frightened of what he would see. But either way he could contain himself no longer and looked at 143 River Road.

There was an iron gate blocking entrance. Beyond the gate lied a three story home, painted a beautiful cream color, and the house looked as though it had been well kept since no one had vacated it in the past fourteen years or so. It looked so comfortable, so lovely. It was an odd feeling looking at his former home as he had no real memory of any of it.

He smiled so happily, just staring at it, with Draco behind him, also surveying the surroundings. He wanted to run inside, seeing everything. He could only imagine how much was left, but he wanted to see anything and everything he could. What would he learn?

"Who's there?" bellowed a loud voice of a woman. Harry turned on a reflex and saw a woman who looked under thirty with auburn hair and a slim figure. "Who are you?"

She sounded very alert and angry. Harry, scared yet containing it completely responded with the truth. "Harry Potter." Perhaps it would save him.

She looked completely awed and shocked and she simply stood there for a moment, not blinking, completely stunned. After a bit, she smiled sadly at him.

"I knew you would come back one day, Harry," she said. "Your mum was my best friend."

Chills ran through his body in such a surprise. His mother's best friend? He felt so lucky, so joyous to be meeting her. And a desperation ran through him. What could she tell him? He yearned to learn anything …

"You knew my mother?" he said, not able to contain his plea for information. "Is there anything you could tell me? _Please_."

He was begging but he did not care.

Once again, she looked at him very sadly. "She was so kind … So loyal … So beautiful, and she loved that paino of hers."

"My mother played piano?" no one had ever told him this. Harry realized though he had felt he had known his parents as such wonderful people before, there was so little he truly knew. But now there was someone who would tell him. Someone who wouldn't treat him as a child and block out so much.

"Heavens, no one has told you? She was an amazing pianist. I keep the house up in their memory, Dumbledore asked me to," she said. "My name is Jillian Chase."

"You know Dumbledore? Are you a witch?" Draco spoke for the first time.

"No, but I was Lily's best friend and I was trusted," Jill said. "I want to show you inside."

Draco felt positively happy for Harry. It was his time, and he wanted Harry to enjoy it as much as he could. He was visiting his parent's home. As they went room to room, looking at pictures and paintings of the Potters … their furniture, things most people wouldn't care about, Harry was positively amazed. Draco couldn't recall ever seeing him so happy in his life. It was most wonderful.

And then they went to Lily's music room. It looked very cozy. There was a small couch next to a furnished window, a small closet and then of course, an expensive looking antique piano. Draco had expected an old dusty item, but it looked positively new. Harry brightened at it as he ran to touch and enjoy it so wonderfully. Jill was getting something out of the closet.

Jill took a vinyl and record player out and as Draco asked what it was, she simply smiled to herself as silently tears flowed down her eyes, and they waited eagerly. And once the record began, what followed was a sad sounding piano piece, obviously done by Lily. It sounded a bit rough, but the talent was there. It reminded Draco of the death of soldiers at sea … It sounded beautiful yet so devastation. Draco looked over at Harry, who was smiling like a happy child.

And a male voice began apparent after a minute, singing along perfectly.

"Didn't anyone tell you your father sung?" Jill said, smiling through the tears.

Harry was in another world of his happiness, somewhere in a realm of completeness.

Next Jill showed them Harry's former baby room. It looked brand new; it was quite disturbing to Draco. This must have been the room where Lily had been killed. It gave Draco the chills. How anyone could continue to furnish the house disturbed Draco, but he did not say anything.

Jill retrieved a scrapbook from one of the shelves and showed them.

"Your baptism, something you must see," she said, crying more now. "I was told not to show you."

And Draco saw why. In every picture was Jill … She was with Lily and Sirius and James … She was holding Harry in some pictures …. Everyone looked joyful … Draco had guessed perhaps this was the case but hadn't mentioned it as he didn't want make an uncomfortable situation.

"You were my godmother," Harry said, looking in shock to Jill. Draco stood silent.

"I wasn't allowed to meet you for security reasons," And at this Jill ran to Harry and hugged him.

They had left the house and now were at St. Matthew's Cemetery. Harry's heart beat so fast as he examined the graves of his parents, together.

_Lily Eileen Potter_

_January 15, 1960 – October 31, 1981_

_James Maurice Potter_

_March 15, 1960 – October 31, 1981_

And now Harry was flooded with more tears than Jill. Harry felt closer to his parents than he ever had. It was also so real now. The way he felt was indescribable. But he felt so complete.

"Mum …. Dad …." Harry managed, but he turned to Draco in tears. "I can't run away from my past, Draco. We can't keep running. I have to avenge them, don't I? I thought it didn't matter for so long, but it does. It really does."

And Draco held Harry silently for a bit.

**Author's Note**: So today is my final day at school. I sit in the back typing. It took forever, I haven't had my laptop, and A LOT has been going on. In fact, some of this stuff in the story has been happening to me lately! My life has been strange lately. I promise next update will be sooner.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter Thirteen

_I don't want to die_

_And I don't want to live._

_I just want a chance to be with you._

Harry found himself waking in a strange place, not knowing immediately why he was there. He recycled the events from when he was last awake quickly. Godric's Hollow … his parent's house … the graves … And of course, Jill. He and Draco had stayed at Jill's that night. He felt absolutely cozy. Jill had given him a room to himself.

Harry and Draco had not told Jill of their relationship. It did not seem appropriate, do therefore Draco slept in another room. Jill lived in the home of her grandparents, and she took care of her grandparents who needed much tending to, but Harry had not yet met them. He didn't know how long he would stay. As long as he needed to, he supposed.

He was infinitely glad to have Draco with him. It must have been hard for him, naturally, as the entire scenario was about Harry. Harry wanted to include Draco as much as he could for obvious reasons, but really, the entire situation was so personal it made it quite difficult. He was so amazed by everything new he was learning. He had a strong urge to never leave at the moment.

As Harry lifted himself out of bed, Draco came in the room. He was in pajamas, and he smiled at Harry. He came and sat down on Harry's bed and then kissed Harry gently on the lips. It was nice, he hadn't expected that.

"Slept in a bit, didn't you? It's past noon," Draco remarked at him.

"I was really tired," Harry said. "Where's Jill?"

"She's grocery shopping," Draco said. "I told her you might want to stay for a bit."

Draco seemed to add this in quite casually, but Harry knew Draco had actually given the matter some thought.

"Thanks," Harry said. "It's all so great to me, you know."

It's all he could really do to explain how he felt.

"You want to face it all now though, Harry?" Draco asked, referring to what Harry had told him the night before.

"I won't sleep in peace until I do. I'm going to have to, I know it and it's real simple," Harry said strongly. But then he looked at Draco and told him something he'd been thinking about. "But if you can't be on my side while it's happening, it's okay, I'll understand, I mean …"

But Draco didn't allow Harry to finish what he saying, he had taken him in a firm kiss. And now he was on top of him, putting his hands all over Harry's body. And Harry returned the kiss, caught up in the moment, and tried to ignore all thoughts. Harry slid his hands underneath Draco's clothing …

But then Draco stopped and looked at Harry. "I'll be with you. I'm never going away."

Harry knew he would answer this way, but he simply begged silently to himself that Draco meant it.

"Do you want to go home, Draco?" Harry asked him quietly, as they held each other.

"I just want to have something to do … _With you_," Draco said persistently, as if he was begging Harry to understand. "Harry, do it for me."

"Do what?" Harry said, returning the whispering tone.

But then Draco spoke in a rough, excited, happy tone next. "Shag me silly."

Harry was a bit taken back by this. In all honesty, sex really had not been on the mind. He still felt so tired …. But then again, it was sex. But they couldn't in Jill's house, right? What if she walked in? There would be a lot of explaining to do …

But Harry found himself on top of Draco, kissing him all over and feeling him up. It was an opportunity, something he had wanted to do, something he hadn't expected … A lovely surprise. Harry didn't waste time with much passion, though, before he knew it, he had Draco completely undressed.

He kissed Draco for a moment, and as he did, he realized he had a finger inside of Draco …. And then another ….. And then another …. He spat on them considerably to make the experience as painless as humanly possible for Draco. Draco moaned … But in pleasure or pain, Harry did not know. Harry released himself from in Draco.

"Well, sit on it then," Harry said, deciding it would be easiest. Draco quickly got into position as though he had been doing it all his life and slowly, ever so slowly let Harry inside of him. Harry felt at first, almost nothing. It simply felt as if he was going inside of something, but the pleasure wasn't there at first. Harry didn't say anything.

And Draco began making movements on him …. And he didn't feel much. Draco however, took all control on him. It looked like he was highly enjoying himself. Harry simply allowed it to happen for a while, as Draco received intimate pleasure. Every once in a while, Harry would feel a surge of pleasure, but it didn't last long enough for a feeling of appreciation.

"All right … All right, my turn," Harry whispered, and Draco got off him. He put Draco on his side, and then getting on his side, slowly inserted himself into Draco ever so slowly and he then did, feel absolute pleasure. He didn't ever remember feeling such good. Before, when it had been the other way, he had felt a lot of pleasure as well, but he felt this time, it was by far superior. He had to deal with minor pain before …

Harry stopped for a moment so he wouldn't climax. Draco seemed to be grateful. They were both breathing deeply. Draco turned to him and they kissed gently. And Harry continued; rougher this time. He chose aggression. The only thing that mattered at the moment was that he wanted pleasure, and Draco was giving it all to him. His mind felt blank of any other ideas.

And he knew he should stop pretty soon again, but he found himself incapable. His reasoning and judgment was clouded and lost, he couldn't possibly stop now, and he knew he wouldn't. He kept telling himself one more time and he'd stop but he wasn't going to, he knew this. And then he came.

It was one of the greatest moments of his life. He had never come so much. And to actually come inside of Draco was wonderful. He was screaming, he knew he shouldn't but he was doing it anyway. He was shooting inside of Draco … It was like the opposite of the Cruciatus Curse … And then he stopped.

Harry felt as though he wanted to lay back down and go back to sleep. He was breathing deeply and roughly again for a moment, relaxing. It was hard going back down from such a high. He looked over at Draco. He had stained the sheets. He did not know if he had come before he, Harry, or after, or even perhaps at the same time. Somehow, he found it didn't matter.

"That was wonderful … bloody wonderful," Harry said. But then he realized Jill could come back any moment. "Get dressed, quickly."

Harry was completely not into sex anymore now that it was over. He knew this was normal, but it still felt strange. He felt so suddenly guilty and somehow dirty. He didn't want Draco naked like that in front of him right now, and he didn't want to be naked then either. Quickly, they both dressed.

"So …" Draco said, peering at Harry. He looked a bit uncomfortable himself. "I love you."

And Harry was reminded of why they had done that in the first place. It had been nothing dirty. It had been an act of love. Perhaps not in the best time or place, but it was all fine now. It didn't matter. They had not hurt anyone had they? Harry smiled at Draco.

"I love you too," he responded. And then Jill walked in.

"Finally up, Harry, then?" she smiled at them both. Harry felt a little nervous, shaking. Somehow, he felt, she would know. She'd have to know. "What have you two been up to?"

"Nothing," they both said at the same time.

She looked at them curiously, but she must not have that much to it. "All right, then. Harry … How long do you want to stay here?" she looked a bit apprehensive at asking this particular question.

"I don't know. We both have to go back, I know this. Just one more day, I think," Harry said. He was very firm on this. If he didn't leave soon, he was scared he never would. He got out of bed at this, and smiled at Jill. "Thanks for everything you've done. I really appreciate it all."

"Harry! It was nothing at all … Anything for Lily and James's son," she said, beaming at him.

Harry didn't know what to say. He simply smiled at her. He was definitely very appreciative. He still found it quite amazing to even meet a friend of his mother's. Why had no one showed him his godmother before? Harry felt confused …. Offended, really, was what he felt. Why had they chosen to hide her from him?

They had hid Sirius from him, but at the time they had thought him a murderer. He deserved to know Jill though. She was a kind person. Especially now of all times …. The wizarding world was at war, finally. The Ministry was doing all they could and was very unsuccessful. There were murders all the time in _The Daily Prophet_. It had started with the dementor and then the siege at Hogwarts.

It had all become all about Harry then. Everyone had turned to him again. He was once again the hero, the one that would save them all, something he, Harry, could not have taken at the time. He felt perhaps a bit more prepared now, ready for it all. He knew he would have to deal with it.

In fact, he felt ashamed of his behavior almost. He was surprised in himself. He supposed it was partly the entire affair with Draco, but at the same time, it was Draco that had inspired him to return. He couldn't be more appreciative to have gone to Godric's Hollow. But he could take it no longer. He had to ask.

"Why has Dumbledore not told me about you before, Jill?" Harry asked softly and carefully.

At this, Jill burst into tears. She looked away from them. Harry was quite taken back. He didn't know quite what to say. He looked over at Draco, who looked as though he was going to burst out laughing. _He's so sick_ Thought Harry, and almost laughed himself at the thought. But Harry contained himself, not saying anything, afraid of making her feel worse.

"It's my problem, Harry," she said finally. "All the drugs."

Harry's jaws dropped.

"What drugs do you do? We haven't got high in awhile," Draco said and he began laughing pretty hard.

Harry felt beyond uncomfortable, but Jill began laughing …. She had taken it as a joke.

"I have had problems with heroin since I was maybe thirteen. Your mother had been helping me with it actually. When I as friends with Lily was the longest I had gone without doing it, but I haven't been able to stop for the past fourteen years," Jill explained. "I'm not proud of it. It's just become normal. A hit a few times a day and I am fine."

Harry did not know what to say. He could and would not judge her. He saw things in a different perspective now. It really must have been hard for her.

"Draco and I … We sometimes smoke pot," Harry said, hoping that'd make her feel better.

Jill began crying worse. "Please, oh God, don't do crack, and don't get hooked on the shit I do. _Please_."

The next hour or so was very uncomfortable.

Draco had suggested they visit the town to take their mind off things. Jill found herself introducing Harry to everyone, many who were so shocked to see him. They thought they'd never see him again. Others said they'd known Harry would come back some day. Jill even showed them the church in which Harry had been baptized.

At the end of the day, they went to eat at a small little joint. Draco found it interesting. He wasn't used to Muggle diners. He found himself impatient as it took so long for the food to be prepared but he did not show it. He was well trained. When he had been a child, his father had insisted on perfect etiquette or he would have been severely punished.

They ate mainly in silence. Draco was very hungry. They hadn't really eaten much earlier. He had gotten so tired of walking all over town he was very relieved when it had been time to get food.

"I want to let you both know it's been a pleasure having you," Jill said finally. "Please come back soon. Christmas is in a couple of months, can you come then?"

"We don't know," Draco said truthfully. "It's a complicated situation."

"Voldemort's back," Harry said, and Draco shuddered. "The one who killed my parents. And well, Draco's parents aren't on my side. No one knows we're even friends."

Draco was a bit taken back by Harry's apparent need to spread their business, but then again, Jill was pretty cool.

"Oh my God," Jill said, clapping her hands over her mouth. "Is that why you came here?"

"Basically," Harry said. "Everyone's kept everything from me."

"Jill … Did Lily ever tell you why Voldemort went after Harry's parents?" Draco asked slowly. He knew Harry had wanted to know this even though he had never really brought it up.

Jill did not speak immediately. "Of course I do. Harry's parents worked actively against him, first of all. Lily didn't want to join him, mind you; she was a very talented witch. She defied him. She even worked as a spy for a short period of time. Voldemort swore because she left him he would take her first-born son."

"Why not kill her?" asked Harry, who Draco noticed, was listening once again so attentively.

Jill was crying again. "Lily couldn't have babies, or at least they never thought she'd be able to. She was very lucky … She was so happy when she found out she was having you. When she left him, she was pregnant in the early stages, but she didn't know that he knew. Oh Harry."

She had taken him in a fierce hug. Harry's eye had tears in them, but he was not crying. Draco looked at him sadly. It was so difficult being Harry. Sometimes, Draco felt he was taking advantage of him.

"A picture," Draco said. "All of us. You brought the camera right, Jill?"

Harry found it hard leaving the next day. Draco had a perfect plan. They would both go to Diagon Alley first. Draco would get a room at the Leaky Cauldron, and Harry would return first. He would return in two days. Harry felt queasy about the situation, but Draco assured him it'd be fine.

"I'll write you as soon as I get back," Harry said to Jill, and he hugged her a final time. "Thanks a lot, Jill."

Harry and Draco decided to leave very early in the morning so they wouldn't be noticed. Harry was the first off as Draco said good bye to Jill. And then Draco followed him. They were headed for London, and Harry privately prayed that no one in Diagon Alley would spot them.

The travel seemed to take no time at all. He had thoughts running through his head so much. His parents … Jill …. Everything at Hogwarts …. Draco …. Just everything. When they arrived at the Leaky Cauldron, they kept their hoods up and Draco managed to get a room.

"Do you have today's _Daily Prophet_?" Harry asked in a hoarse voice far from his own.

"Yes, of course," Tom the innkeeper said. "God, it's terrible to read these days."

Harry took it and he and Draco followed Tom to their room. He left them there and they entered. It was nice and cozy as always.

Harry looked at the front cover of the _Daily Prophet _and nearly fainted.

_Horror at Hogwarts!_

_The boy-who-lived, Harry Potter, 15 and Draco Malfoy, 15, are both still currently missing. Whether their disappearances are at all linked is unknown at the present time, but Albus Dumbledore, headmaster, is in strong assurance that they are most certainly linked in some way, though he refused to tell the _Daily Prophet_ insider how. Meanwhile, the horrible siege at Hogwarts continued._

_Albus Dumbledore had only left his school for 6 hours to join the search parties for Potter and Malfoy when the terror of He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named arose six days ago. Dumbledore had not left the school unprotected, but they were highly outnumbered._

_Dementors, vicious werewolves, and other dark creatures along with dozens of Death Eaters attacked Hogwarts School. Their first attempt had already left a girl, Blaze Zabini, dead. Their second has proven much more successful. The Ministry with Dumbledore is fighting to retake Hogwarts, though the students are being held hostage by werewolves and the Death Eaters. _

_How exactly the students are suffering is quite unknown at the moment. It is apparently nearly impossible to enter Hogwarts School._

_"I believe Voldemort is attempting to lure Harry back at the moment," Albus Dumbledore reported gravely yesterday. _

_We can only hope the souls of Hogwarts School can be saved._

Harry nearly fainted upon reading this. Draco was reading over him, and he felt Draco clutch his shoulder in surprise and fear.

"Jesus!" Draco yelled. "Harry, we need to go … both of us."

"Of course we do," and Harry looked at Draco sincerely. "I think this could be it. The showdown and all. Voldemort wants me right now, Draco. I love you, and if something happens, something horrible, I want you to know."

And they kissed. All Harry could think about was Ron and Hermione and his friends. Were they safe? What kind of torture were they being subjected to? He didn't even bare the thought of them not being alive. It was too terrible

"I love you too, and I'm ready."

"Ready for what?" Harry asked, wanting a specific answer.

"To face it all with you," Draco said softly.

And neither of them needed the inn anymore as they both left immediately, headed for Hogwarts.

**Author's Notes: **The next chapter is going to be really intense. There will be a death, I warn you. Anyway, I hope you really liked this. PLEASE READ AND REVIEW.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter Fourteen

_Hey, honey mine; I was there all the time._

_And I weep at your feet._

_And it rains and rains._

Harry almost forgot Draco was with him after a while. He was so focused on getting to Hermione and Ron. He blamed the entire situation on he, Harry, and he now would have to correct it. He would only hope he was not too late. If he was, he would be entirely his fault and he would not be able to live with that. The guilt would be too much ….

"Harry! We're nearly there?" bellowed Draco at his from somewhere. Harry was reminded Draco had been right by him the whole time and felt a bit guilty for not paying him one bit of attention. Draco would have to understand the way he felt though. He had a million emotions running through him.

"Right," Harry said, out of a forced response. He began landing. His heart was beating so fast. He looked over at Draco for a split second when Draco was looking away and he knew Draco was probably confused on why Harry hadn't even decided to speak as they landed in Hogsmeade.

"Harry, HARRY! Stop!" said Draco, and he sounded quite angry as they landed right behind a shop in Hogsmeade and Harry attempted to begin running. "What the hell is wrong with you? You can't just run into a trap like that!"

"Harry and Hermione and everyone are there, Draco! I have to get to them!" screamed Harry angrily at Draco.

"Stop, it! Harry, you can't be so damn reckless? Do you want to get _killed_?" Draco sounded furious, but there was definitely a faint worry in his voice. If he hadn't known Draco very well, he wouldn't have noticed it all, but after some time with Draco, you begin picking up on things like that.

"I want to save my friends," Harry said quietly, he himself realizing he was being reckless. He needed to stop … to think … To find out what they were going to do.

Draco looked at him in a sickening way. It actually made Harry a bit fearful – He did not like seeing that expression on Draco because he hadn't seen him on it since they were enemies.

"Gryffindors," he said very quietly. And then he said louder, "_reckless_. Look, Potter, if you want to save Granger and the Weasel you'll need to be prepared or you'll never get to them alive! You know what we are dealing with!"

Harry looked away, a bit ashamed.

"All right, well, w should probably try to find out what's going on here at Hogsmeade. Here, get under the Invisibility Cloak."

"Hang on," Draco said, and he put a charm on their broomsticks so the only people who could see them were he or Draco.

Draco took the leaded once they got onto the streets of Hogsmeade, which seemed to be nothing short of deserted. There was absolutely no one around. In fact it was quite spooky. They were in what use to be a packed village all the time. It had turned into nothing more than a ghost town.

Then they approached what was a small hotel. He saw a man in a pinstripe cloak running inside hurriedly. Draco was almost positive this was the Minister. Draco vaguely wondered how Fudge was still Minister of Magic. It would probably be a few days before he was sacked. Draco smiled to himself.

"Do you think we should go in there and reveal ourselves?" asked Harry.

"No, I don't. They'd want us to stay there and be _good boys and behave ourselves_," Draco said in a mock voice, now laughing.

"This isn't funny, Draco!" Harry snapped at him.

"Oh, right, maybe you'd like be to panic instead?" Draco snapped right back at him.

"Shut up, Malfoy," Harry said annoyed. "I have an idea, though."

"What would that be?" Draco asked.

"Let's go see if that wine cellar is locked up. We can get to Hogwarts through there maybe," Harry said.

"Yeah, hoping the Death Eaters haven't discovered it yet, which I'm sure they would have. Come on, use your _brain_. Plenty of students would have escaped by now, and there was certainly nothing in the paper like that. We'll just go on the main road under the cloak and see what we can do," Draco said.

"I suppose so, then," Harry said. "And Draco?"

"Yeah?" Draco said casually.

"Don't die on me," Harry said and he proceeded forward this time.

Harry had no idea what the plan was – Well he didn't have one really. He and Draco were under the Invisibility Cloak, equipped with only their wands, having to leave their brooms behind as it obviously didn't fit under the cloak. But Draco, next to him, didn't seem nervous at all. This made Harry wonder for perhaps the millionth time whether Draco was human or not.

As they approached Hogwarts, Draco unleashed himself from the cloak.

"Draco, what are you doing?" Harry said in a panicked voice.

"Are you forgetting who I am? Do you know who _my father_ is?" Draco said to him in a whisper, in a once again, sarcastic familiar voice. "I'll make it easy for us to get in. Just trail right behind me, Potter, and don't fuck up. _Please_."

This was Draco's way of saying he did not want to lose him. Harry smiled to himself. Draco was a very sick fellow after all. Harry silently prayed this would work. Lucius was probably in charge of the entire operation now that Harry thought about it, though …

Harry watched Draco actually attempt to _open _the castle doors. Of course that didn't work. Draco knocked.

A voice of a female, a soothing, cool voice came from no where.

"Who is there? It is impossible to lie to me," the voice spoke in a chilled tone.

"Draco Malfoy," Draco said firmly.

There was a pause and the doors opened. It was Lucius Malfoy. He held the castle doors open and Draco slowly walked inside and Harry trailed right behind. The rescue mission had begun.

"Draco, Draco …. Where have you been? You have disgraced me? I have refused to believe you have run of with the filths of Harry Potter, but you have much explaining to do," Lucius said, and not in a fatherly tone at all. All there was in his voice was sheer intimidation.

Draco was already very used to this regardless. He smiled mirthlessly at his father.

"How good it is to see you father," Draco said. "I sought out to find you, as I wanted to know why you left me locked with the rest of the students in the Potions classroom."

"Dear, Draco, do not tell me you are so foolish. It would have been very suspicious had I saved you," Lucius said, looking at his son like filth. "Do you know the whereabouts of Harry Potter?"

"No, father, I do not. I was sure he had come by now. What exactly is going on?" asked Draco.

"The mudbloods are being tortured. The great purebloods have been saved of Slytherin. The mudbloods and blood traitors are being starved … tortured."

Lucius spoke the words so softly and he sounded absolutely proud of what they were doing.

"How about Granger?" Draco asked, sounding as though he found all this amazing. His father knew of his hatred for her.

Lucius did not speak right away.

"She's gone missing," Lucius whispered. "And so has her little boyfriend, the blood traitor."

Of course he spoke of Weasley.

"Any deaths?" asked Draco.

"A few mudbloods have died, yes," Lucius said.

"Wonderful," Draco said. He then looked right behind him, hoping Harry was there and made a signal to him that he hoped Harry would understand.

Harry pointed his hand right at Lucius Malfoy. "_Stupefy_!" And he was stunned. Harry took off his cloak momentarily. Harry searched Lucius. He took his wand. He checked his pockets and found a piece of paper that looked like a map.

It seemed to be a map of what they were doing. The muggle-borns and blood traitors were all locked in the dungeons and the purebloods were in Gryffindor Tower quite ironically. There were Death Eater guards everywhere. Harry wasn't too worried … They'd be fine under the Invisibility Cloak.

What he was worried about was Ron and Hermione. They had gone "missing". What did that mean? Had they run away before the secret passageways had gotten blocked out? It was quite possible. But could they be … No, it wasn't possible.

Harry showed Draco the map. Draco peered at it and smiled.

"Perfect. This won't be too difficult," Draco said.

"MALFOY!" yelled a voice; another Death Eater.

Draco and Harry quickly got under the cloak. They watched as a Death Eater Harry recognized as Avery found Lucius Malfoy's limp body. Avery looked fearful upon finding Lucius. He bent down to feel a pulse on him.

"Dumbledore," he said quietly.

Getting to the dungeon took a very long time. The hardest apart was the actual entrance was guarded by three Death Eaters Draco knew quite well. They were Crabbe and Goyle's fathers and Nott. Draco felt a pang of fear. Getting out of this one would be difficult, but a surprise attack would only benefit them.

"Harry, this is the part when you save the day," Draco whispered, and he squeezed Harry's hand for a moment and then threw the cloak off of both of them.

Together they aimed their wands at the three Death Eaters.

"_Impedimenta_!" Draco bellowed at Nott, going for the strongest link first. Distantly, Draco heard Harry stun Crabbe.

"_Expelliarmus_!" Goyle screamed at Draco and his and flew out of his hand. Draco attempted to catch it, but he missed by several inches. Draco panicked for a second as he dove for his wand. But then Harry stunned Goyle.

Yet Nott was back on his feet.

"Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy – Not altogether unexpected," Nott said, grinning evilly. Hastily, he sent a stunning spell at Harry that missed. But Draco had already gotten his wand again.

"_Expelliarmus_!" Draco said, pointing his wand directly at Nott and his wand went flying. And together, Draco and Harry sent stunning spells at Nott who went down hard and horribly. "That wasn't too bad."

Harry and Draco entered the dungeons to find huddles of people together, expecting the worst and their faces shining when they saw those two there to save them.

"Harry Potter!"

"Draco Malfoy, though … Odd one, mate."

"Does anyone know where Ron and Hermione are?" Harry asked the large group of people.

Everyone looked very pale and very thin. They had been living off of nearly nothing. They had had very little. Their wands had been taken away and they had been subjected to the horrible conditions.

"They ran away at the beginning of the siege," It was Lavender Brown. "They said they were going to find you."

Harry was shocked to hear this, but then again, it wasn't too unlike them at all.

"Yeah, they only just managed to get away," said someone else.

"Lucius Malfoy mentioned some people have died," Draco said. "Who?"

Harry thought Draco was approaching the situation very insensitively.

"Harry!" Ginny Weasley ran up to him and gave him a huge hug. She was very cold and her hair was falling out. "I thought you had died. Oh God, Harry."

"Ginny, don't worry, I'm okay," Harry said, patting her on the back. "We need to get you all out of here right away."

Draco tied up the Death Eaters with some tricky wand work and along with Harry began leading the students. Thankfully, no one asked too many questions most likely due to extreme hunger and exhaustion. Draco felt a bit shaken; if he could just get these people out of the castle and to safety without disruptions ….

He actually found himself getting in front of Harry, leading. His identity probably wouldn't assist him much anymore, but still somehow it seemed better that he lead rather than Harry. Finally, they were out of the dungeons and on the main ground.

And they were surrounded.

Harry could not believe it. There were perhaps a dozen hooded Death Eaters all with their wands pointed directly at Harry. They seem much less concerned with everyone else. And then their eyes shifted direction to Draco. Harry was shaking with fear. All he could do was stall.

"Lucius is so ashamed of you, Draco," whispered one Death Eater at Draco.

"As if it matters to me what my pitiful father thinks," Draco said rather boldly. "Plan on killing us, do you, Parkinson?"

"We may just spare you, Draco, given you tell us what the hell is going on and stand aside," responded the Death Eater that was Parkinson.

Harry eyed Draco. He had no idea what to do. He and Draco alone were armed against a dozen Death Eaters. They were six to one. The only escape was the windows to the right, but he didn't even know that would be possible at the moment. And then the idea struck him.

"_Isalo Winsoala!_" And the Death Eaters all few perhaps fifty feet back in a horrible whirlwind charm that Harry had struck at them very quickly. "The windows, hurry!"

He heard Draco mutter '_Alohomora'_ and the windows flew open and everyone was racing to get out. Thankfully, the windows were large. Already, The Death Eaters were attempting to come back.

"_Protego_!" Harry said quickly, shielding himself and Draco momentarily as everyone was racing out. The shield would not last so long though. But Harry was not thinking about the future at the moment; that would drive him mad. He was only thinking about that very moment.

He couldn't believe everything. Six days ago, they had been trapped in the Potions classroom on Voldemort's first attempt. When they had left and gone missing, Dumbledore had left to search for them and the Death Eaters had returned. Harry completely blamed himself. Why had he been such a coward, so foolish? People were dead because of him …

"Harry, come on!" yelled Ginny, and Harry realized a stunner was coming right at him and he jumped out the window, missing it by inches.

Draco was right by him.

Harry had told them all to run towards Hogsmeade. He knew he and Draco had a battle to fight. Ginny did not leave them. The three of them shot stunning spell after stunning spell at the Death Eaters as they were a bit vulnerable climbing out the windows.

Remarkably, the moment they had left the castle, the wands of the prisoners had returned to them. Harry felt much more secure about the safety. If they could just make it to Hogsmeade in time, everything would be fine. And they could tell the Ministry and Dumbledore that he and Draco were still at Hogwarts and help would come ….

And then, still outnumbered, the three of them ran for it. But they ran into something much, much worse. Six chimaeras and Draco knew very well they were beyond dead now.

"Invisibility Cloak, quick!" Draco yelled, and the three of them threw each other under it and Draco did something both dumb and brave.

He pushed all three of them down but holding them under the cloak and began rolling them down the hill that would lead down to the lake. He could hear the chimaeras, but they weren't too close … Obviously they weren't too near.

"Be quiet," Draco said to them. "They might find us."

Finally, they had landed at the bottom of the hill and they were on the grassy area right by the lake.

"That was very close," Harry said. "I thought we were dead."

"Don't count your eggs until they hatch," hissed a small voice at them, and Draco saw his father along with Snape standing in front of them.

_The nightmare ceases to end_, Harry thought to himself bitterly. He was very angry now. He couldn't bear to see Snape. Truthfully, they could not technically see them at the moment, but they had heard them rolling down and heard them talking to each other. They probably didn't realize Ginny was among them unless they had seen her when they were by the castle windows.

Harry slowly began to get up and Ginny and Draco followed suit and they were running but he was sure their ankles were showing. He could feel the stunning spells brush against his skin …

They would run up the other side of the hill granting they got to the hill. Then they could just run a bit and they would be back on the road that would lead to Hogsmeade. There was no way they could face any more of this and come back to somehow tell the tale. And he had Ginny of all people with him …

As they got to the little hill, Snape and Lucius were feet away and Harry realized they were not going to get away. They would have to face it in all the exhaustion, in all the inabilities they were currently facing; they would have to fight …

The morning sun was now blazing on them.

Ginny was remarkably the very first one to get out of the cloak and she sent a stunning spell at Snape that missed by inches, but it had been a fast and hopeful attempt.

Draco shot a spell Harry did not recognize right at his father's chest as a spell hit Harry directly in the chest before he could dodge it. And that was the last thing Harry could remember.

Ginny screamed as Harry hit the ground but she was able to dodge what was the Cruciatus Curse coming from Lucius. Draco looked absolutely livid.

"Give it up father! It is over! _Septementa_!" Draco screamed, and then all Ginny could see was a huge pile of blood and a limp body where Lucius was. He looked worse than dead.

Snape actually looked at Draco in fear now, but before either of them could act, Ginny had stunned Snape.

_"Yes ladies and gentlemen, this is all really happening at Hogwarts … Hogwarts is in a state of quarantine as dozens of aurors raid the school …. The surviving students have been sent home in extreme cases of distress … We are not completely sure what happened but eyewitnesses are reporting that Harry Potter And Draco Malfoy returned to Hogwarts and were able to rescue the students trapped in the underground dungeons … Vicious duels followed …. Luckily, the survivors were able to alert Albus Dumbledore who was in Hogsmeade at the time and he came to the rescue of Harry Potter, Draco Malfoy, and who also remained, a dear friend of Harry's, Ginny Weasley. Harry was found stunned and limp and Draco Malfoy and Ginny Weasley were both physically wounded. _

_"Not only this, but what was found was the dead body of Lucius Malfoy who had revealed himself as a Death Eater. Draco Malfoy, none other than his son, attacked him with a Slashing Hex. There will be an inquiry. The death toll currently stands at nineteen including students and four Death Eaters. After Harry Potter and his friends were rescued, there was an intense duel to recapture Hogwarts. Many bodies were found of students who had reportedly been murdered or starved to death."_

Harry climbed out of bed, not believing his ears. He was in some type of hospital, not at Hogwarts, though. Was he at St. Mungo's? He did not know. What he needed right now was Draco. There was no one in the room with him, but there was a telephone. And then he had an idea.

"Harry Potter is that really you?" it was the same announcer that he had talked to so much during the summer. He had been the reporter on the Hogwarts incident too.

"Yeah, and I was person who called in so much this summer …. And now I need to talk to the person who was on the other side of that … _Draco_. Please, Draco, if you're listening, call in _please_." Harry did not care how ridiculous this all was.

"So is that the mystery? That is how you two became friends and why you disappeared together," the reporter said.

And there was another call.

"Harry," spoke a small voice. "Where are you? No one's telling me shit."

"Some hospital," Harry said, not caring he was having a personal conversation over the radio. "Where are _you_?"

"You're not going to believe it, but I'm with the Weasleys," Draco said, sounding as though he must be smirking on the other end.

And Harry did not wait.

"I have to go."

Harry found himself racing out of the hospital, people trying to stop him everywhere, and he did not listen It had been a really strong sort of stunning spell, he was absolutely fine, there was no reason to worry. He had to get The Burrow ….

"HARRY POTTER!" Harry recognized it as Cornelius Fudge, none other than the Minister of Magic. "GET BACK HERE THIS INSTANT."

Harry raced out the doors and found himself in Hogsmeade, and he was thankful for that. It wouldn't matter either way. All he knew was somehow going to get to the Burrow. And Harry thought. He and Draco's broomsticks …. He was running towards the back of that shop.

And he found it. His broomstick. Draco had already gotten his apparently. But there was a note attached to his.

_That's right. Come to me, Harry. I know you will._

Harry actually smiled. "Bastard."

And Harry went to Draco.

Ginny sat with Draco in her room back home. She had actually begged Draco to come with her. He had faced it all with her, together, and he had protected her. And Ginny knew about the relationship between he and Harry. She had glimpsed them kissing one time when she had followed Harry on a midnight meeting. It had been hard, but she had mainly followed his footsteps as he had that wretched Invisibility Cloak, but he had assumed he was going to snog some girl at the North Tower anyway. And when she had got there, properly hidden, she saw Draco kissing Harry. And she knew.

She and Draco obviously had never been on great terms, but of course, complete catastrophes can really bring two people together. He had not talked much, they had just been listening to the radio when they heard Harry was looking for Draco and Draco called in. But Harry had gone as soon as he knew where Draco was. They didn't know where Harry was.

It was raining a horrible storm outside. It had been raining all day. They hadn't even slept yet. It was a bad storm, and the thought of Harry coming in that weather bothered her. After the siege at Hogwarts ended, Ginny and Draco had left to the Burrow on Dumbledore's orders and had been waiting for word on Harry all day.

Ginny's parents had told Ginny and Draco nothing other than the fact that Harry was completely safe and they would see him soon. Soon, obviously, was not good enough for either of them. The only positive thing that had happened was Ron and Hermione's arrival earlier that day. They had been missing nearly as long as Draco and Harry. They had yet to tell their story.

"Draco, I know you're upset about your father," Ginny said, as Draco had been sulking in guilt over the fact he had killed his father.

Draco spoke quietly and not immediately. "I wasn't trying to kill him, just _show_ him." He sounded completely traumatized by what he had done.

And then, coming through the window was Harry.

"Harry!" Ginny screamed, as he got off his broomstick. She embraced him. But then Harry turned to Draco.

"Draco …."

Draco came to him and held him. But did not only hold him. He kissed him gently.

"I didn't want to kill, Harry, I didn't mean to. I can't believe I killed my own father," Draco sounded so shaken and sad and worse then he had ever heard him.

And then Draco Malfoy was crying. Draco Malfoy … the boy who had been his rival for four years …. His lover for a few months … The all-powerful Draco Malfoy was weeping. Draco kneeled to the ground, feeling so contaminated he was weeping at Harry's feet.

**Author's Notes: **This chapter is my masterpiece I think. It was horrible. You may not like Draco's father, but him dying will not be taken lightly. And the death toll of the students …. It will shock you when you find out just who died. PEASE READ AND REVIEW, THIS IS A HUGE CHAPTER. Ginny is going to have much more a role from now on, I wanted to make her a bigger character from the beginning but she hadn't fit until now.


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter Fifteen

_Pretty faces grab the headlines_

_You leave me nothing but my name_

_And all the grief keeps multiplying_

_And I pretend to feel no pain._

Harry woke up on the third day since the siege at Hogwarts ended shaking from a horrible dream he had had the night previous. Harry was quite shaken as he had been shocked the dream had repeated itself once again. Somehow, he knew it was the same dream, but the details were once again absolutely fuzzy. All he could remember was a horrible fire and screams.

He hadn't got a chance to talk to anyone really since he had arrived. Only an hour after he had arrived, he had been taken right back to the hospital and had been forced to stay there for two days. He had only just returned to The Burrow the night before, and everyone had already been in bed. Mrs. Weasley had shown him to bed and he had lied awake until he fell asleep.

Harry jumped out of bed and looked around. Ron wasn't in his room. All Harry saw on the other side of the room was a half-closed drawer with some shiny material coming from it. Curious, Harry walked over to it.

He opened the drawer, feeling guilty, but his curiosity overbearing it.

It was a pensieve.

Draco sat nervously in Dumbledore's office, not really knowing what to expect. He had been the first student to reenter Hogwarts since the siege because Dumbledore had said it was urgent he spoke to him. Draco did not want to speak to anyone, least of all Dumbledore. But he had no real choices. He had learned that the last few days.

"I know it may not quite be your pleasure to visit me today, Mr. Malfoy," Dumbledore spoke calmly.

"Yes," Draco responded boldly.

Dumbledore smiled at him. "The bravery you showed was amazing. You saved a lot of innocent lives, Mr. Malfoy."

To this, Draco had no real response. He hadn't really taken the time to appreciate his own success at all. He had barely acknowledged it. The entire thing to him had been a simple survival of his own; he hadn't really thought of the others he had saved.

"I know you are questioning some of your own decisions. To do this is to be human, but I can tell you that what you did was …"

"Don't tell me I did nothing wrong!" Draco suddenly said in a tone that sounded dangerous.

"Draco," Dumbledore said in a very kindly yet prudent tone. "Would you have been willing to sacrifice Harry's life and possibly Ginny's?"

It was quite obvious Dumbledore knew he had most definitely at the very least befriended Harry and Ginny.

"No," Draco said quietly. "I wouldn't."

"Draco, please listen carefully," Dumbledore spoke most gravely and most vigilantly. "I know you loved your father."

He paused for a moment.

"Your father was absolutely incapable of loving anyone other than Voldemort; he didn't even love himself. I'm sorry," Dumbledore spoke empathetically.

And somehow Draco knew Dumbledore would say no more. He had made it so simple, so absolutely clear. Draco felt a burn sensation at his eyes most suddenly and looked away from Dumbledore. He hoped he wasn't looking at him. He couldn't control himself.

Draco sat in the Hog's Head a bit later by himself. He didn't want to go to The Three Broomsticks as he didn't want to attract attention to himself. His face was all over the headlines. Everywhere he went he was regarded as some type of tragic hero, and truthfully, Draco was having a hard time relating to the headlines.

Draco actually saw an abandoned magazine titled _Wizard Today_. He actually had been a subscriber previously. On the cover was Harry looking sideways at Draco who was staring at Harry as well, almost like a mirror reflection. The headline of the magazine read as follows: **TWO PREVIOUS RIVALS BECOME HEROES TOGETHER AND FIGHT FOR A NEW LOVE. **Not really sure what they were writing of, Draco opened the magazine and went to the article on him and Harry. It went on for several pages about the Hogwarts siege and the horrific happenings which Draco would rather not read. But one part did shock him:

Though it may seem the rival has most definitely ended between Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy, it has far from ended. A close source to us notes that the only true reason Draco Malfoy went along with Harry Potter for the rescue was because of his dear love for Ginny Weasley, which also explains why he has been staying with her since. However, many others have informed us there have been sparks between Harry Potter and Ginny Weasley since the moment she stepped foot in Hogwarts. Many also seem completely convince the disappearances of Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy may not be linked at all. Many seem to think Draco Malfoy, who was a son of a Death Eater (At this, Draco felt a chill go through his body.), must have known of future plans and fled but upon knowing his dear Ginny Weasley was in trouble returned.

The article continued on and Draco was quite surprised by the rubbish that they had had the nerve to print. Draco now highly wondered if all the news he had read in this magazine before had a trace of truth in it. Now, the magazine seemed much more like a tabloid then anything. They were most definitely in it for the money at least in such a time when they could make a profit. Draco often forgot he too was well known in the wizarding society through association to the Malfoy family. His attention shifted, though, when a figure in a gray cloak and veil sat down on the other side of the small table he sat at. The figure revealed itself.

Draco was very shocked and didn't believe his eyes at first. It was his mother of all people.

_"Hermione, please don't cry," said a distressed Ron who looked quite uncomfortable. "I'm sure Harry is fine." _

_"He's just disappeared, and so did Malfoy! Even Dumbledore thought the two connected!" said a weeping Hermione in Ron's arms. "I can't do this anymore Ron."_

_She sounded most contained at the final sentence._

_"You're right, Hermione. You know I'm real worried …. I just, I dunno," said a shaking Ron with fear written all over his face._

_"We have to get to Malfoy's house," Hermione said, wiping her tears. "Before the battle out there ends."_

_"It looks horrible out there … And with Dumbledore gone," Ron trailed off a bit, looking as though if he continued it would be too awful._

_"I don't think the battle down there has reached the upper levels yet …. Let's go through the One-Eyed Witch," Hermione said prudently._

Draco eyed his mother very carefully. He was absolutely shaken by her sudden influx. He was shaking all over, and he felt beyond nervous. He looked at her warily. She did not look angry, upset, happy, sad … None of it. She looked indifferent. She looked him straight in the eye.

"Hello, Draco," she said, lacking sentiment or even human n her voice. "I must have a word with you."

Draco did not speak. He could not bring himself to.

"It is very unwise of you to walk around town like this. Do you realize how dangerous it is for _you_?" She spoke not like a concerned mother, but like a mocking enemy.

Still, Draco refused to speak.

"You have disgraced me and you have killed the most important person in my life. The most essential person to you other than the Dark Lord …. Or so he should have been. You are no longer a Malfoy and you are lower the dirt. I, however, remain your mother."

She paused.

"I shall grant you one last thing. But after that, there is no more. I shall feel no guilt, have no more obligations. Give me your hand," she spoke in the once again, indifferent tone.

"What are you going to do?" Draco asked, alarmed and finally speaking. He hadn't an intention of putting his hand on the table that instant, though all the same, he was sure his mother wasn't going to hurt him.

"I'm going to grant you one last thing," she said, repeating herself. "I am going to give you The Vow of Luck."

_"Wake up. Hermione," Ron said._

_Hermione awoke from the small motel bed._

_"You frightened me," she said in a small voice. "The Malfoy estate is just a few miles away."_

_"Yeah, but we had to rest … We traveled for too long," Ron said, trying to make logic of the situation. "But we should be on our way."_

_"I just hope we find Harry and he is all right," Hermione said, shaken._

_"He is, of course he is …. He did write us that note, don't forget," said Ron, though he wasn't certain of himself at all._

_"Yes, but that could mean a number of things," Hermione said. "Let's go. I think we'll find answers at the Malfoy Estate."_

Draco put his hand on the table. Slowly, Narcissa put her hand on top of his. She looked focused now. She was eying Draco closely, and her eyes were now completely shut. She then spoke to him a small voice. "Put your other hand on top of mine."

And Draco did. And then Narcissa put her other hand on top of Draco's. For a moment, she just screwed her eyes shut and looked much focused, and didn't say anything for several moments.

There was then an intense tightening on their hands. The hands combined felt as though on fire, burning, though with no resistance. It would be impossible to let go. The pain did not subside in any way.

"Ask me the questions, now," Narcissa said in a quick and anxious voice. It was more of a demand then anything.

"Do you, Narcissa Malfoy, wish to transfer forces of positive energy and karma to me, Draco Malfoy?" Draco recited as calmly as possible.

"I do," she responded.

The burning sensation grew.

"Do you, Narcissa Malfoy, accept responsibility for the fortunate events that I, Draco Malfoy, may encounter?" Draco once again recited.

"I do."

The burning sensation grew even more. Draco winced horribly.

"Do you, Narcissa Malfoy, accept if you try in any way to rectify this action, only the opposite effect of the charm will incidentally happen to you?" Draco chanted quickly.

"I do."

"Do you, Draco Malfoy, accept the gift I offer to you?" It was Narcissa speaking now, in a hurried, harsh tone.

"I do."

And the pain vanished and their hands flew apart from each other like identical magnets. Draco looked at his hands; taking deep breaths feeling so relieved as it had gotten so unbearable towards the end. There was not a trace of a burn but Draco knew there wouldn't be.

And then, a ring appeared on his finger. It looked old and rusty. An identical one appeared on his mother's hand. Draco peered at it and twisted it around his finger to avoid looking at his mother. He was almost sure when he looked up she'd be gone. She was not.

"Keep that ring on, you know why," She almost smiled, but then she really did vanish.

_"This is it then," Hermione spoke mainly to herself as she and Ron approached the iron gates to the Malfoy Estate. "Harry's probably trapped in there."_

_There was an absolute horror yet bravery in her voice._

_"How are we to get in, Hermione?" Ron asked carefully, not wanting to upset her more._

_"Alohomora," Hermione whispered, and the iron gates flew open. "The only way we know._

_She wasn't the Hermione Ron had always known who had all the answers. Now she was desperate to save her best friend,_

_And Ron heard something coming towards them. It sounded like a group of people or things running towards them …. Not as loud as horses but not as quiet as people. And then Ron saw it and it almost fell over._

_Six wolves were going after them. Hermione screamed and almost fell over. Ron couldn't stop shaking. He didn't know whether to run or prepare to try to stun them. But the wolves were much too fast to run away from …_

_And they were twenty feet away. Ron tried to prepare himself aiming his wand at them. But he couldn't stop _shaking_. "Impedimenta!" Ron screamed nervously and two of the wolves slowed down. But it wasn't enough to stop the other four._

_Hermione yelled a stunning spell at one of them but another literally leaped on top of her while the other two headed for Ron. Hermione screamed, using her arms to push away the face (and therefore the teeth) of the wolf. It was fierce and she could no longer take it …_

_And the wolf cried out in pain. Hermione rolled over. Ron had stuck a knife into it. His lips and face were bleeding. It was not horrible, but not too mild either._

_"Ron, you're all right," Hermione said. "You saved me."_

_"He prolonged you," said a harsh voice and they turned to see Narcissa Malfoy. _

_And then everything went black._

Draco knew he should go back to the Burrow but he didn't want to. He sought to be alone. He was very surprised even now by his mother's sudden appearance out of nowhere. He wasn't really surprised of the charm she had placed on him. It was an honor code thing. Now, she was in complete peace with herself. It all went back to the pretentious nature of the Malfoy family.

Draco was in a complete blur. Everything was happening so fast and everything was changing on him so drastically. He didn't know how to handle it. He had known it was going to happen, but he had chosen to put a mental block on it for obvious reasons. And he was now facing all of it.

Draco felt much more secure, however, now having the charm that would protect him. It would not permit you to stop using common sense such as simple procedures and such, but it gave you an amazing sense of luck. It barely mattered to him, somehow.

All the sudden he felt the need to be with people. He hadn't wanted that before, but as he had just lost his family, he somehow needed to be around people to not feel so absolutely lost of people. The solitude was beginning to get to him to a degree Draco didn't like.

Draco thought about it for a moment. He could return to the Burrow, obviously. He had a desire to get very drunk, though. But it was no fun without Harry anyway.

_"STOP!" Ron was crying, actually crying. He couldn't believe what was happening. Nothing this horrible had ever even come to him in nightmares …. Not in that sense, anyway. He couldn't believe their rotten luck; He had been so damn foolish._

_He didn't believe what Narcissa Malfoy had done …. Taking them into a little dungeon and locking them up. And then two Death Eaters had come in._

_"Nowhere to hide anymore, kids," One of them said, laughing heartedly. "And look …. This one is pretty."_

_And the other slapped Hermione across the face. Ron had yelled out. But it had gotten so much worse. He couldn't believe it was happening. And then the two of them had torn off her clothing._

_They wouldn't stop hitting her, hurting her …. Ron heard her screaming and yelping for help. There was nothing he could do. Magic had him sealed to the wall._

_Ron closed his eyes not being able to watch as the men forcibly and unwillingly embraced Hermione crudely. _

_They were going to die._

Draco hurriedly got the floo powder ready. He was leaving. He didn't want to attract much attention. He was leaving directly from The Three Broomsticks to the Burrow. He would have left from the Hog's Head, but the crowd was fishy there, and he didn't want to possibly attract attention to himself and possibly allow his location to be tracked.

He was leaving all the misery behind. Harry would be waiting for him ….

_"Hermione … You're alive," Ron said, waking up. He was no longer in the dungeon. Somehow he was outside of the Malfoy Manor again. He briefly remembered being knocked out by one of the Death Eaters._

_"I knew there was only one way … A form of sympathetic defensive magic against …. Well, rape. I was unleashed from the chains and was able to save you. You have to be an extremely powerful and focused witch or wizard to perform it without a wand. It left me feeling so weak, but we had to get out of there," Hermione explained, but she was crying horribly now._

_"Hermione, it's all right. It's over now. I'm going to kill those bloody bastards," Ron said. He hugged her affectionately._

_"Oh, Ron," Hermione said, whimpering. "Let's get out of here, please."_

_"We will, Hermione. We're going to survive. And I don't think Harry was in there," Ron said, patting her on the back._

_"No, he wasn't. I threatened those Death Eaters as I held the charm on them. Granted, I couldn't have possibly held it any longer, I would have likely passed out, but had I held it much longer, it would have done them much more damage. Anyway, they told me no one knew where Harry was or …. Even Malfoy they have no idea," Hermione explained quickly. "We should go."_

_"Hogwarts …. I wonder what's going on," Ron said._

_"I don't think it is safe to go back right now. Let's go to Diagon Alley," Hermione said, snapping back into a prudent and contained mood._

_"All right, Hermione, but one thing," Ron began in a soft voice._

_"Yes, Ron?" she asked him._

_"I love you."_

Harry flew out of the pensieve suddenly.

"Niiiiiice, Harry."

That was Chapter Fifteen. It would have been done much sooner, but I didn't have access to the computer I had begun work on this chapter on. I had started it and got pretty thoroughly in right after Chapter Fourteen was up. Then I went to Tennessee and then Miami just this weekend …. I saw Madonna, and it was fantastic!

Anyway …. Who do you think caught Harry? Will Draco cope? I very specifically did not want Harry or Draco together in this chapter.


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter Sixteen

_Get well soon_

_Please don't go any higher._

_How are you so burnt when you're barely on fire?_

Harry sharply turned around, nearly fainting in exasperation and anxiety. He could feel the sweat piling up on his forehead. He felt so scared to be caught in that situation. Harry's heart skipped a beat when he saw who it was.

"Draco," Harry said in a low voice, though he wasn't necessarily relieved. "You won't believe the things I just saw."

And Harry couldn't take it. He began to weep. At first, it was almost silently, but then he cried out and buried himself in Draco's arms. He couldn't speak, not even to Draco, out of pure guilt for the situation. He felt if he did speak he would lie in some way. His only way of talking to Draco would be to cry horribly.

"Harry," Draco said softly. "Oh, Harry." He said Harry' name like a mother who so dearly loved a mischievous child –In an 'I-Don't-Know-What-I'm-Going-To-Do-With-You tone'.

Harry felt Draco's arm around his back, patting it ever so gently. Draco didn't even know what Harry had seen but he already chosen to comfort him for it. It was so unconditional, Harry learned for sure that day, the love they had. Somehow, in some way, he was sure things would turn out okay.

"Don't hate me, Draco," Harry moped, though he knew Draco wouldn't. "_Please_."

"Be quiet, Harry, for me," Draco spoke in a firm yet pleading tone. And then he pulled Harry off of the embrace and stared him right in the eye and pulled him in for a kiss. And for a moment it worked; Harry kissed him furiously as if Draco's kiss was the only thing that could heal him. But then Harry pulled off him and cried harder,

"I love you," Harry said. "But I can't do this, not now."

Draco looked neither surprised nor displeased. He just looked inquiringly at Harry, as though curious as to what Harry would do next. Draco crossed his arms and watched Harry carefully. Harry, though, looked just as awful and puzzled before, and now, speechless.

"Harry, what the fuck is wrong with you? What did you see in that?" Draco asked, sounding annoyed, and lacking compassion. Harry did not respond, just gaped at Draco sadly, looking ashamed. "TELL ME!"

Draco was now shaking with anger and Harry was actually frightened. He rarely saw Draco like this anymore, and wasn't exactly used to it. It was genuinely horrifying as you never knew what Draco might do when angry. Harry was taken aback, and he simply looked straight at Draco and told him.

"I saw Ron and Hermione being tortured horribly," Harry confessed in a whisper. Draco looked at him very much taken aback and now looking very uncomfortable. But then Draco gave him a very gentle toothless, sad smile and embraced Harry again. It was obvious Draco didn't feel there were words he could say to console him – And Harry was grateful for that.

Harry did not remember how long they stood there like that with Draco holding him, feeling his temporary embrace as a source of longing relief. But he knew it would not last forever. Still, he attempted to appreciate the temporary bliss.

"I love you, Harry," Draco finally said in a tired voice. "But you're such a _fuck-up_."

Harry almost laughed at this, but he was sure it wasn't a joke.

"I love you, too," Harry said. "Because you're my twin in the fuck-up department."

Harry giggled and hiccupped at this at the same time.

"Oh, very funny," Draco said, and let go of the embrace and affectionately patted Harry's head. "Simply incommodious, you are, you know that?"

Harry smiled at Draco. Harry was quite aware absolutely nothing had changed and that the situation was still bleak and horrendous, but somehow, and as he had always been able to, felt much better after being with Draco. Harry was sure he'd feel a terrible guilt trip over this. He tried not to worry too much about it.

"As are you," responded Harry. Draco reached out for Harry's hand and they both fell on top of the bed with joined hands, simply enjoying each other. Harry fell back onto the bed with Draco, and head to head they lied down sighing deeply. For a while, they did not speak at all, simply staring at the ceiling together, being lazy and trying to be as thoughtless as possible.

"Do you think we'll live through this war, Harry?" Draco finally asked. And now it changed; it was Draco who wanted answers and was confused. It was Draco showing his concern now.

"If you live through this with me, I swear I will die for you," Harry said to Draco, plainly, and without emotion, but it meant a lot to him in reality.

"Of course," Draco said. "_Nos totus intereo unus_."

"Is that Latin? What does that mean?" Harry asked curiously. He didn't know Draco could speak Latin, but at the same time it didn't surprise him. Draco was full of secrets, and it was part of his appeal. His extreme etiquette, however, would only encourage the idea of him speaking more than one language.

"It means 'we all die alone'," Draco explained in a low, depressed sounding voice. Draco stared blankly into space.

"That we do, Draco, that we most definitely do," Harry said in a gloomy, yet somehow, accepting voice. "But I'll always wait for you on the other end."

"That sounds boring," Draco said, now smiling.

"I hate you sometimes, Draco," Harry said, as he was upset he had said something so passionate and Draco had such an inadequate response to give back.

"Bugger, Harry, I'm only joking," Draco said, laughing half-heartedly. And then he spoke in a smaller voice. "I'd wait for you all eternity."

Chills flowed right up Harry's spine at these words; no one had ever said anything quite like that to him. Harry had no words to return, so instead he climbed on top of Draco and began kissing him gently. Draco puts his hand on Harry's shoulder, caressing it gently and Harry put his hand on Draco's knee, gently rubbing it affectionately. Harry pushed against Draco, penetrating him with clothes on. Draco moaned.

The entire ordeal seemed not sexual, but sensual. There was a soothing sense to all of it. There were no vehement actions exchanged; Harry did not feel aroused almost, simply happy to have Draco's hands on his body and his own on Draco's. There was something absolutely precious about it.

"Oh, baby," said Draco softly, as he kissed Harry's neck.

Draco sat on the table in the Burrow quietly, watching Granger and Weasley eat in silence. Harry was somewhere else in the house, still quite unready to face his friends. Draco felt no need to force him to do it either. It was up to Harry when Harry needed to face Hermione and Ron. If it were he, Draco, he for sure would not find it easy.

"Hello," Granger said, not even looking at him. It was obvious she felt sorry for him. Weasley said nothing. "How are you?"

"How do you think I'm feeling?" Draco retorted sourly, not in the mood for her unneeded sympathy.

"Oh, that's nice," Ginny said who had just come in for some lunch. "Don't be such a bother, Draco."

"He better not be," Ron said, quite impatiently. "After the shit we've done for him."

"I don't need sympathy," Draco said, ignoring Ron's last comment.

"Yeah, all you need lately is my best friend, right?" said Ron rather heatedly. "What have you done with Harry?"

"What do you mean, 'what have I done with him'? He's still here, isn't he?" Draco said, and let out a sardonic laugh, but truly feeling angry.

"You all aren't just friends, are you," said Ron; it wasn't even a question. Hermione grabbed his hand at this point and Ron looked away.

Draco pretended not to hear Ron and looked at Ginny, who looked uncomfortable. At that point, however, Ginny grabbed Draco and took him to the garden outside. She forced him to sit down, but she didn't say anything at first. She just eyed him.

"How is Harry?" she finally asked softly.

"Lost his fucking marbles, Ginny," growled Draco. "He can't deal with the guilt of it all."

"He has no more guilt than you and he certainly redeemed himself, didn't he?" Ginny said, as though annoyed by Harry's sulking.

"Of course he has more guilt to get on with than me," Draco looked up at Ginny, surprised by her comment. "I mean, after what happened to your brother and Granger."

"What are you talking about, Draco?" said Ginny, sounding puzzled.

"What do you mean? They didn't tell you? _My God_, don't take me," Draco said, sounding distressed and agitated. "I don't even know the details – What did they tell you?"

"That they left to look for Harry, found out about the siege, and got a little sidetracked …. And that's what happened, right?" said Ginny, slowly, and sounding very anxious now. Draco did not answer at all. "RIGHT?"

"Never mind …" began Draco but he was cut off.

"Don't talk to me like a child, Draco. Tell me what happened to them. I have a right to know!" said Ginny, rather indignantly. She was quite heated and scary in this situation.

"I know that, Ginny!" Draco retorted, letting out boiled anger inside. "I'm just not the one to tell you, all right?"

"Well, if Ron and Hermione aren't, then who is?" Ginny screamed.

"FINE! JUST FINE! BUT DON'T TAKE OUT ALL YOUR ANGER ON ME WHEN YOU FIND OUT THEY DIDN'T TELL YOU THIS!" Draco screamed in a hurtful tone, and then took several deep breaths and calmed himself. "Hermione and Ron sought out Harry and ended up at my house – _And they were bloody tortured_."

"What?" Ginny asked, after she gasped. It was obvious that she was hoping it was some kind of sick joke and she was in obvious disbelief. "What did you say, Draco?"

"What on earth is all this screaming about?" came a voice from inside. Coming into the garden was Hermione herself, looking pale and frightened. "What's going on out here?"

Both Ginny and Draco were completely quiet and stared at each other for a second and then at Hermione. Hermione looked uncomfortable. She looked much shaken, more so than ever normal before. Ginny peered at her sadly.

"Oh, Hermione," said Ginny and ran over to her and embraced her. And then she spoke in a quieter tone. "Tell me everything."

"What are you talking about?" asked Hermione in an obviously defensive voice. "I have nothing to tell you, Ginny."

"It's fine, Draco told me …." Ginny began, but Hermione looked furious.

"How does he know?" asked Hermione indignantly. She then turned to Draco. "How _could_ you know?"

"Harry told me," Draco said quietly, knowing very well it would go onto a much longer explanation.

"But we didn't tell Harry either …" Hermione said, more to herself than anything.

Ron came out to the garden then as well. He looked around and asked what was going on. It was then that Hermione broke into tears and Ginny and Ron began to try to comfort her. Draco, feeling very out of place, ran back into the house. On first instinct, he was going to run upstairs to Harry but then felt that might not be a great idea either.

"Get back here, Malfoy," Ron's voice came. It wasn't angry, but Draco knew if he didn't come, he would get angry. Draco decided to come but only because Ron had had the decency to keep his temper at a dull roar. Reluctantly, still, he walked back out to the garden. Hermione was a human hosepipe.

"How did Harry find out, Draco?" Ginny asked in a sort of begging tone.

"I have a damn good idea how!" said Ron, now angry. "Did you have him look at my pensieve?"

Draco was furious at the unfairness of that comment. "No, you arse, I walked in on him looking at it and stopped him!" If Draco had had a club, he was sure he would have hit Ron with it. "Harry's upstairs feeling shitty right now."

Everyone was quiet.

"He saw … Everything?" Hermione's voice came sobbing.

"Just about," Draco now spoke complete flatly with not a trace of sympathy. "So if you're done playing the martyrs, I think I'm going to go inside now."

Draco gave them all, even Ginny, a look of disgust and went inside.

Harry was lying down in Ron's room, lacking energy to get up when he heard a loud crack and someone apparated in the room. Harry nearly fell off the bed in response and looked up and saw someone he surely did not expect in front of him – Professor McGonagall.

"Good afternoon, Mr. Potter," she said, as though she had been well invited. "I hope I find you well, even in the given circumstances."

"I'm all right, professor," Harry said slowly, still surprised. "But what on earth are you doing in the Burrow?"

"I have come to inform you school will be in session once again next Monday," she said. "At the very start of November, that is."

Harry looked at her curiously. That was all good and well, but he was sure she would not come to personally tell him or anyone this. He was sure she had more to say. At the same time, he was grateful for her visit – He had a million questions to ask.

"How is … Everything?" Harry finished rather lamely.

"Mr. Potter," Professor McGonagall said, clearly ignoring Harry. "There is something you need to know before returning to school."

"What is that, Professor?" Harry asked, his heart beat speeding up significantly.

"Cho Chang and Seamus Finnigan, both of your good friends, I know, have been reported dead," she said gravely, and tears were rushing down her eyes. "I am so sorry."

A million different emotions ran through Harry at once: sadness, fear, disbelief, shock …. He couldn't take it in or believe it. Seamus Finnigan … the nice guy he had shared a dormitory for so long ….. And Cho Chang, the girl he had crushed on for so long; envied Cedric for …. _Cedric_, he was not the person to be thinking about.

It couldn't be possible. How could it be? Harry's first instinct was to ask how it had happened but he found he didn't want to know. Harry found himself falling back onto the pillow and underneath the blanket. He heard Professor McGonagall say something but he wasn't listening. He was responsible now for the death of two people and it was a burden he couldn't take …. He burst into tears. He tried to be quiet so his professor would not see.

"Potter, please don't be self-destructive. You showed a lot of courage; you saved many lives," Professor McGonagall said gently, trying to take the covers off of him. "Even if Dumbledore hadn't gone after you, there would have been an attack."

"NO! IT'S MY FAULT! I WAS A COWARD BEFORE I SHOWED ALL THAT SUPPOSED BRAVERY, PROFESSOR! JUST LET ME ALONE, OKAY? GO TELL RON AND HERMIONE THE NEWS!" Harry screamed at her. He felt so uncaring about his treatment to her though in normal circumstances he wouldn't have dared spoken to her like that. At the moment, however, he didn't find himself caring about anything. People were dead because of him …. Nineteen, in fact, and furthermore, two of his friends. "Who else is dead?"

"The rest were first and second years," Professor McGonagall spoke in an actual scared tone. "I'm quite upset too, Potter."

"But it isn't your fault they're dead!" Harry said indignantly.

Now, Professor McGonagall looked angry. "Potter, be sensible! Do not be so bold as to take complete blame for the siege! Is it your fault He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Name wrecks havoc and destruction and we were hit horribly? I think not!" Her mouth was very thin, but it went back to normal size almost immediately, and pulled the blanket off Harry. Harry was very surprised when she actually gave him a hug. "There, now, Potter, it will all be all right."

Harry cried hard.

Draco lied in bed with Harry hours later, holding him close. He had no words to console, no sarcasm, no harsh words, nothing. He felt it was just kinder of him to say absolutely nothing. He knew very well Harry was still awake, even in the complete darkness, shaking in guilt. Draco held Harry's hand, somehow feeling that he was helping in that way.

McGonagall had told Draco, Hermione, Ron, and Ginny the news of the deaths. Ron took it very badly and Hermione cried very hard. Harry never left Ron's room. Eventually, Draco went up but did not speak once. He simply held him. Harry hadn't eaten a thing all day but he did not try to force Harry to eat. The situation was hopeless. The only healer would be time.

Generally, Draco would think the worst is over. But Draco knew very well the worst was yet to come. Harry had a battle to fight. Draco would only aid Harry through helping him through each step, but Draco was quite sure in the end, it would be Harry alone. And Draco realized if he wanted Harry to succeed he could no longer hate Weasley or Granger, as they were Harry's best friends, and through them, did Harry always succeed. They had to come together.

Draco was very afraid as well. But he knew horror was coming and he would have to face it when it did. He held Harry's hand tighter at this thought. He felt his eyes burning for a moment. Almost instantly, the feeling went away.

"Oh Harry, if you live through this with me, I swear I will die for you," Draco said, and then finally, he felt Harry fall into a deep, and hopefully, dreamless sleep.

**Author's Note**: I haven't forgotten this story! I actually have a school laptop now, but I have had a lot going on with school, but also a bit of writer's block. Anyway, I think the chapter turned out rather good. Draco's last line is from the Hole song "Asking For It". The next chapter features everyone back at Hogwarts. Promise it will be a shorter wait … This time, I want more reviews than ever because I want to make sure you haven't forgotten me. By the way, I've started archiving this story on Fiction Alley. Look up my pen name and you'll also find my short parody A Question of Sex. I wrote another story just this weekend which is a one-shot (Draco/Ginny) which I'll host there and probably here. Until Chapter Seventeen ….


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter Seventeen

_Miles and miles of perfect sin_

_I swear, I do, I fit right in._

_I fit right in your perfect skin_

_I cannot breathe._

Harry could not believe they were not even half way through the year and they had found themselves riding on the Hogwarts Express once again. The journey had only just begun, and there was truly much tension going on. When people passed by Harry, they often stared. Some actually spoke to him. They were always words of kindness at first but they would often ask him questions he would rather not answer such as why he had disappeared in the first place. However, many assumed he and the "changed' Draco Malfoy had done something heroic and Hogwarts had simply the encore. It had to do with the way _The Daily Prophet_ was painting them at the moment.

Harry was sitting with Draco in a compartment. There was absolutely no reason for them not to hang out at school anymore. Besides all that, most of his former Slytherin friends were very against him now. Draco was mildly concerned about living conditions in the Slytherin house because of this very reason, but Harry himself wasn't too worried.

Harry was not speaking to Hermione and Ron yet. Draco had told him they knew he knew about what happened, but Harry felt too uncomfortable to go talk to them. And they seemed to feel the same way. He wasn't necessarily avoiding them …. It was almost just they had nothing to say. He and Ginny had been hanging out frequently, though.

"So, how different do you think it's going to be?" Harry said to Draco at some point.

"I don't know," Draco said honestly. He then chuckled a bit. "How long has it been since we were in class?"

"I dunno, two or three weeks," Harry said. "Bloody too bad it wasn't an actual vacation."

Draco laughed out loud sourly. "We have the memorial service first thing, right?" he said, as though they were discussing what was for dinner.

"Yeah," Harry replied. "And your father is a part of that."

Draco did not anticipate the scene they arrived to upon leaving the Hogwarts Express. There were reporters and cameras everywhere as he and Harry attempted to find a carriage with Ginny, who had found them along with her friend, Shauna. They were bombarding them and Draco was quite tempted to curse them all to oblivion.

Eventually, the four of them were able to get into a carriage (and the very last people not surprisingly) and the carriages instantly began moving. Draco was severely annoyed at this point. "What the fuck are they doing here?" Draco swore loudly.

"They're allowed to be here because of the memorial service. Don't worry, it's for one night," Shauna said, smiling at him. Draco had never spoken to this girl before. She had long natural dark hair, dark eyes, and light skin. She wore a smile as though nothing made her happier than to be in the world. This almost irritated Draco. He certainly was not the campiest person around.

Once Draco got out of the carriage, he was once again bombarded with the stupid reporters. Ginny grabbed his arms and was attempting to pull him away while Shauna did the same to Harry. However, the effects of these actions were misleading.

"Harry Potter has found love! And so has Draco Malfoy! Look at the stunningly pretty redhead!" said one reporter, and others said similar. Draco rolled his eyes. He was about to enter the castle when a reporter literally grabbed his elbow.

"Mr. Malfoy, please – I can offer you the cover of _Witch Weekly_!" And it was this very comment that made Draco stop in his footsteps.

"Come on, Draco!" Ginny said impatiently.

"Did you hear what this woman just said? Come on in, Miss," Draco said kindly to the reporter.

* * *

Once Harry was seated in the Great Hall he looked over at the Slytherin Table but Draco was nowhere to be seen. Harry wondered where he had run off to. Ginny sat next to him, looking annoyed. She sighed deeply.

"What's up? Where'd Draco go?" Harry asked casually.

"To go for a photo shoot!" Ginny said heatedly.

"What?" Harry asked, smiling at the silliness of this. He laughed a bit.

"_Witch Weekly_ decided they wanted to give dear Draco the cover," Ginny said heatedly and Harry burst into unnatural laughter – At least unnatural compared to the all the rather melancholy decorations and sadness surrounding him. But Draco would always be Draco.

* * *

Draco pulled the reporter and her photographer into the Slytherin common room of all places. He had them wait patiently as he dressed and fixed his hair appropriately. He wanted to look very good looking – Not that he didn't always automatically, but even he felt he could tweak himself a bit. The reporter seemed happy to wait. When he finally felt he looked nice, he went back down and sat down with the reporter and she took out her Quick-Quotes Quill and almost immediately began talking.

"How are you, Mr. Malfoy?" she began and did not wait for an answer. "So the media is portraying you as such a hero!"

She gave him a moment to contemplate on that. "Yes," Draco responded, realizing the interview could be less fun than he anticipated. "I quite think so."

"And how would you feel about this?" she asked.

"I like when people keep their noses in their own business," Draco said plainly, not impatiently.

"Wouldn't you consider Hogwarts the business of the wizarding community?" the reporter asked.

"Of course, yes! But the media has not reported much, but _exploited_ Harry and I most recently, haven't they?" Draco said intelligently.

The reporter looked a bit taken back. "So what is the deal with you and Harry Potter?"

"We talk. We have to now," Draco said, choosing his words very carefully. "Now that I've switched sides and all."

"Against your father," the woman said which Draco thought was very bold but he did not show it. Draco felt a spot in his stomach tightening. The murder of his father on his behalf was NOT something he wanted to discuss. But he had a feeling the reporter would die to have the story on his supposed heroics.

"Yeah. _Against my father_," Draco repeated with a stern composure to his voice.

"Do you believe the school has opened too soon or are you happy with the on goings?" the reporter asked, obviously realizing the need to change subject.

"I think if Dumbledore said it's fine to start school again, then it is, isn't? It's not as if Dumbledore doesn't know what he is doing," Draco said, feeling annoyed as such an extraneous questions.

The reporter was quiet for a moment, thinking. "The nineteen reported death were very tragic. Were any friends of yours?" she finally said, obviously going for a sympathetic topic.

"No, actually," Draco said flatly. "Friends of friends at most."

"Fascinating," the reporter said, showing it all over her face her lack of questions that would provoke true thought. "Were you surprised by the actions of Severus Snape?"

"No, I wasn't … not at all. It was always only a matter of time wasn't it? My father had always been very close to him," Draco said, and he realized he was shaking. He could barely believe he had said that.

_He had killed his father_.

* * *

Harry was feeling very uncomfortable as the four Houses proceeded to the outside graveyard for the services in memory of those lost during the siege. Everyone still saw him as the hero, naturally, and felt absolutely uncomfortable at this. And not only that, but Draco was still no where to be found. And Harry was very worried. Was the interview really taking that long?

"Don't worry about him," Hermione said to him at some point as everyone got seated outside. Dumbledore was the primary speaker but there were also many Ministry officials there. The headstones of those dead during the siege were to the sides of all the seats, surrounding them. There weren't too many burials in the graveyard, just those headmasters who died or anyone who had died in Hogwarts. Of course, one headstone stuck out to Harry. _Lucius Malfoy 1956 – 1995. _Harry could feel the hairs on the back of his neck stick up. He couldn't believe it. Lucius Malfoy was gone.

Harry became quite pale. He didn't want to be there at that moment, though he knew he knew he should have felt honored. He felt no honor. Somehow he felt shame, embarrassment, and emptiness. He wished he could melt into nothingness.

And then Draco came and sat next to him. He looked paler than normal, and he did not smile at Harry, but barely acknowledged him. The gesture was almost cold. Harry wondered what was the matter with Draco. Had something the reporter done offended Draco? Knowing Draco….

* * *

Harry felt like crying. He wished Draco would embrace him but then he wished he wouldn't; he wished he would talk to him but then he wished he wouldn't. He wasn't sure what he wanted at that moment. He stared fixedly at Dumbledore for a moment, and then turning away, he noticed the graves of Cho and Seamus. His heart felt as though it had fallen out of his body. He wished to disappear.

Distantly, he heard people speaking, and then Dumbledore. He wished he was paying attention, and though he was hearing words, Harry was making no means of comprehension whatsoever. He felt dreadful.

And then a few words sunk in. "_Cho Chang would have graduated next year_ …" It was not Dumbledore speaking. Harry turned and saw who must have been Mr. and Ms. Chang. Both looked horrid and Ms. Chang and Mr. Chang were filled with uncontrollable tears. Cho had been their only daughter. Harry looked away; not being able to bear looking into their eyes.

But Ms. Chang came to him. "You would have saved her if you could," she said tearfully. "You are hero."

And at this Harry could take it no longer. "I'M NOT A HERO!" he yelled, and then ran off. He did not look back. He heard murmuring and confusion, but he would deal with the embarrassment later. He was scare to be around everyone. He felt such guilt. He felt like a slithering snake who had evaded confinement. He was definitely no hero.

Harry did not run back to the castle but to the Quidditch Pitch. He was sure all wondered what was wrong with him and he was sure they'd all link it back to his supposed insanity in fourth year or desperate need for attention but he did not care. It was a personal need that forced him to leave. When he finally stopped, running, he was out of breath and fell to his knees. He dropped his body into the dirt and simply faced into the ground.

There was certain bliss about it. He heard no one around and no noises except natural ones. He wasn't looking or observing anything, and for a moment, he had no worries. He was simply relaxing with his face against the dirt and lacking any emotions momentarily at all. Of course, slowly, the moment ceased to exist as he heard footsteps coming at him.

But Harry did not wait. He did not even turn back. He felt no reason to talk or see anyone, and therefore, he lacked the notion to find out who it was. He ran to the broom cupboard, got one of the school brooms, and still not looking who had come to see him, mounted the broom, and flew away.

* * *

Draco felt like shit. He could never remember feeling so badly. Harry had run off before him of course, and moments later, Draco fled too. He did not follow Harry, finding no need to save Harry again. He felt so incomplete, empty, and lacking all energy to help Harry. He ran to the one place that was so familiar to him; the Slytherin dormitories. There were several people in there as few Slytherins felt any remorse for the victims. After all, some of the Death Eaters were related to them. Then again, many Slytherins _were_ at the ceremony.

Draco began rummaging through his stuff out of almost boredom. He was looking for nothing yet he knew there was something missing. He began throwing all of his stuff around his dormitory violently and as he did it he doubted he'd feel any satisfaction in the end but he did not care. He couldn't stop himself.

And then everything was everywhere – All around Crabbe and Goyle's stuff and around Greg and Marty's as well. Crabbe and Goyle were both downstairs but they came up immediately at the sound of Draco screaming in fury. When they saw the mess, they looked livid yet very frightened.

"Fuck off before I kill you both!" Draco raged at them, and he honestly felt that he meant that comment so much. "I despise you."

But Draco felt so stupid, standing there in a mess he made like some toddler throwing a tantrum. So embarrassed, he ran off and left the Slytherin dungeons, honestly unsure when he was coming back. He ran through the corridors and a few people tried to stop him here and there but he paid them no attention. whatsoever. In the end, he found himself in the library. He buried himself in a chair and put his face in his hands for a moment begging to ignore reality. No one was around, thank God.

Draco spotted some parchment and a quill and ink on a table not far away from him. And he felt compelled to write something though he had no idea why. He knew he wouldn't be able to express himself to anyone, so perhaps he could write it all down. Draco walked over to the table and thought for a while. And then he began to write.

_Dear God,_

_I'm writing this letter to you because I'm such a lost boy aren't I? Do you laugh at me as I lie here hopeless or do you shine a light of hope on me? I see no light; I see no hope for redemption. I am a murderer, God. Will I burn with the rest of the poor bastards in hell? Will I rot even though they say you're a loving God? I'm such a lost boy. No one can help me right now. Will I ever recover? Will anyone understand me? Will Harry be okay?_

_Will I burn because I love Harry, God? Will you, the God they call loving, damn me because I love Harry? There is such little love in the world God. Why damn it? I've never ever felt this way before. But not even Harry can save me and I sure as hell cannot save him. I am at the lowest point of my life, God. Save me from this world._

_Draco Caleb Gabriel Malfoy._

And then Draco dropped his head and slept.

* * *

"I can't tell you how nice it is to see you, Harry," Tom the innkeeper said to Harry as Harry settled into a nice little room at the Leaky Cauldron. "But you know you shouldn't be here."

Harry said nothing at first. Tom just smiled at him. Harry fell face first onto the bed and didn't want to get up. He heard the door shut softly, indicating Tom had left. Finally, there was some aura of peace in the atmosphere for him. But Harry could not sleep, though he shut his eyes for several moments.

And he got up and looked at himself in the mirror. He had never seen himself look so tired, so empty, so sad, so _dead-like_. He couldn't live like this. He felt like he was dying. And then he realized he had no place here. Running away wasn't going to solve any of his problems.

And then Harry made up his mind.

* * *

Draco was having a fine time in the village by his old home, drinking like a fish. He knew he needed someone to stop him eventually, but he was not focusing on that thought at all. No one knew it was him yet roaming around, and he was glad of this. He had disguised himself well.

"Be careful with that, chap," said a drug dealer who definitely did not care. Draco had just bought some ecstasy. He had always promised himself never to get into the club drugs, the crazy shit that it provoked. He felt very guilty already, but he was trying very hard to not care at all. Securing the pills safely in his pocket, he headed over to one of the dance clubs.

Draco was pretty surprised at first that the little district was still running after his father's death. But he knew his mother had just picked it up again. It made the Malfoy family so much money. But thinking about his mother was not a good idea …. No, he would leave her for another time, or hopefully never again. He was going to dance, be free, and let go of all emotion for a few happy hours and nothing was going to stop him.

As Draco entered the club, he heard the blazing music and saw the craziness of the dancers, the shining lights, the drinking, the partying, the drugs, and the entire atmosphere. The area was packed. This was good, as Draco would not stand out. Before anything, however, Draco had something to do. He slid off to the nearest bathroom.

Draco took out the Ziploc bag he had the pill in as he stood in the stall. This was it …. Peace, happiness, relaxation …. It was going to be great. Draco closed his eyes as he swallowed the pill right down. Draco was ready for some good times.

* * *

**Author's Note**: Sorry for such a long absence. I've been busy with everything. However, remember the story often reflects my real life. I'm going to be even busier as I'm starting a job this week, but hey, maybe I'll have some more inspiration!


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter Eighteen

_When the water is too deep,_

_I will ease your suffering._

_When the glitter fades in morning,_

_Turn away and you will find my empty eyes —_

_Your beauty__ blinds__._

Harry had flown back to Hogwarts that same night. Running away had felt glamorous for perhaps that evening, but he knew it would ultimately solve nothing, perhaps even doom him to repeat history. Besides, to begin with Harry's own disappearing was essentially the whole reason behind most of the guilt he was carrying. He definitely didn't want to relive the experience.

At the present, Harry was lying back in bed, simply thinking. He had the sheets over his entire body, liking being hidden from the world in a sense. He thought of Draco and the victims and of Ron and Hermione, and how he felt so horrible. Hermione had been so violated in so many ways. She had been checked out by Madam Pomfrey already and she said she was fine, but it didn't change history. Though Hermione did not seem traumatized, Harry was sure she was.

Ron seemed closer to Hermione than ever these days, and he knew there was a romance going on, though Harry did not question them at all about it. He wasn't sure the two of them had it figured out to explain it to Harry yet to begin with. And therefore Harry surprisingly felt he need not meddle — that _had _to be a first!

There were rumors spreading around school about Draco and Harry and the true nature of their relationship. Slowly, people seemed to be realizing it was more than just a friendship. Harry tried not to pay attention to the rumors. But he had already heard many people talking about it. And though he denied it to the few who asked, he was sure no one took his word for it. In some ways he was okay with it all, but in others it was absolutely overwhelming. He hoped it didn't get to the newspapers.

Just as Harry was diving into a deep sleep, he heard footsteps coming to his dormitory. He took the blanket off of him and looked over warily. It was quite late already. What would anybody need at this time?

"Mr. Potter." It was the voice of Professor McGonagall. "We need your assistance."

Harry's heart began to race. "What is it, professor?" A million horrible thoughts ran through his head all at once.

"Mr. Malfoy has disappeared," she confessed in a grave yet watchful tone. "We're hoping you may be able to help us track him down." She spoke with utter sincerity and true hopefulness.

What had Draco done? Draco was most likely in a great temper, and it scared Harry what may have been going on at that very moment or what had already happened. Quickly, Harry got out of bed.

"_I'll find him_."

* * *

Draco felt on top of the world. He could do anything of course – He was Draco Malfoy. There was nothing at all to be sad about; nothing whatsoever to truly focus any bit of on worry on…And why? Because it is a splendid happy world after all, obviously, and therefore Draco Malfoy was a very happy person. So happy, in fact, that he could not help but be all smiles as he trotted around in his happiness…

He left the bathroom feeling a bit shaky but very nice and heard the loud music and it made him almost fall over. It all felt so intense. There were so many people around moving so fast and in every direction. There was bliss to it to just watch but then it almost frightened Draco. But then he started focusing on the song. It was nice...Quite nice.

Draco found himself prancing over to the dance floor. He didn't care what people thought. He was going to dance to this song…This song was amazing…He felt nirvana in hearing it. The musician was a saint for creating it…And now he could feast upon it ecstatically – What an amazing person, whoever released the song! Draco felt like crying in love for the song, and for the musician, too – he the glorious man whom had been _such_ a Good Samaritan in releasing its beautiful melody to Draco's ears…

An auburn-haired tanned boy who looked a couple years older than Draco suddenly approached him. "Hullo," said the boy cheerily. "Care to dance?"

The boy was quite a beauty. How kind of this lovely world to let Draco feast upon him as well! He smiled at the boy. He was so handsome … Draco barely felt he could control himself. "Why hello there, mate! I'm happy to see you! Of course I'll dance with you."

Draco, in a happy motion grabbed the boy and began dancing with him. Draco always could dance. It was something that had come natural to him. He was being more aggressive this time, but it didn't seem to matter. The boy was grinning like a madman as Draco nearly straddled him from behind in motion.

Draco was beginning to feel the heat in the room. It was very hot. It was ruining the moment for him. As the song finished, he realized he was sweating horribly. He ran off from the boy and knocked into a few people by accident. But he didn't care at all. He found himself by the bar. He was now angry. He jumped up on top of the counter.

"You know, I was going to have an _amazing_ night. And I am!" he yelled euphorically, temporarily realizing the heat wasn't a big deal. It was all so wonderful. "But it's so hot in here!" Draco was sweating all over his face. Someone tried to get him down and he jumped down himself. "Sorry, mates! Uh, I'll be-, behave, yeah, it'll be all right, _right_? Uh, yes, um, reckon so eh…"

His words slurred with terrible obviousness, his apparent disconcertion from reality all-too-apparent. Panicky, confused voices began spluttering in the background:

"_That boy_..."

"_Get him help_…"

"_He's not right_ …"

With each fading moment Draco heard more and more murmurs like these repeat everywhere around him, growing louder and louder. Why were they talking about him like this? He felt amazing really. Why had he made such a big deal about the heat? He felt intense … He felt he could do anything. The world was his oyster. Draco grinned at all the faces around him who looked scared.

"Another bloody stoner," barked some security guard.

Draco turned around and was grabbed by an armed man twice his size. Bulky, super-giant hands immediately clutched Draco into a tight hold and overpowered him completely. He'd been utterly blindsided.

Draco screamed out in terror.

* * *

Professor Dumbledore entered Ward 31 at St. Mungo's to find one of his more – _delicate_ pupils lying unconscious in his stretcher looking very pale indeed. Dumbledore watched Draco Malfoy with a wary eye, shaking his head. He was not happy at all with Draco. He had been most foolish and was lucky to be alive. As Dumbledore stood there, a woman walked in.

"Hello, Jillian," Dumbledore said kindly, turning to face her, smiling, though not truly looking happy. "I'm most delighted to have you in my presence."

"I haven't seen you in years, but when Harry and Draco came to me I was so happy to see them. But I can't believe Draco would do this. This is terrible. How do they handle things like that in your world? Do they pump it out of his stomach too?" asked Jill curiously.

"Not precisely, no. We have mediwizards who do specific magic to get rid of the drugs in his system. They have done this successfully, but Draco is still a bit ill. He should awake soon," Dumbledore informed her, not sounding as though he felt at all sorry for Draco.

"I see. Well thank you for inviting me, Professor Dumbledore. I was happy to see Harry today. He came to me thinking Draco had come to me. He should be coming a little later in the afternoon. He is taking a bit of a nap. He didn't want to, but I forced him to," explained Jill. "I'm glad to see Draco is going to be fine."

A mediwizard walked in and examined Draco for a moment. He then took out his wand and pointed it directly upon his chest. "_Enervate_!" he said softly, and Draco awoke with a shock. Draco lifted his head and looked around. He looked very confused as to where he was and he looked extremely stunned but other than that he looked normal. He looked at Dumbledore and then looked very frightened. And he noticed Jill and wondered why she was there and where he was to begin with.

"Welcome to St. Mungo's, Mr. Malfoy, your new residence for the time being," enunciated Dumbledore dryly, a wry grin written across his face.

"What? NO!" Draco exclaimed. He was now angry and furiously tried to get out of bed.

"There will be none of that, Mr. Malfoy. You will remain cool and calm by your own volition, just as I know you are fully capable of, or I shall _force_ you to!" Dumbledore ordered firmly.

Draco looked sullen. He threw the sheets over himself not wanting to see any of them, apparently.

"Really, Draco, you're acting like a child, now," Jill said in a gentle tone. She went over to his bed and forced the sheets off him. "You know very well why you're here."

"So? It's none of anyone's business but my own if I want to take drugs," Draco snapped rather boldly.

"You made a public commotion and when a security guard tried to escort you out of that club, you attacked him. You overdosed on ecstasy, Draco. You were running a very high fever and could have died, Draco! What were you thinking?" Jill chastised him urgently, now much less patient.

Draco looked as though he wanted to yell back at her, but he did not. "…I just wanted to be free for a while. I wasn't trying to overdose on purpose," he responded in a weak, pitifully abashed tone of voice, looking intently away from Jill's eye.

But no one was ready to hear his excuses.

* * *

Harry awoke from restless sleep feeling quite angry at the world, which wasn't an actual new emotion by any means but he felt helpless. He had sought out Jill's home in Godric's Hollow in his search for Draco. He was sure he would be there, but instead he had ended up waking up a very tired and confused Jillian who had offered him so much hospitality so recently – Harry had felt like shit.

And then Jillian had not let him leave. She had contacted Dumbledore herself to let him know Harry was with her and that's when they had received very frightening news. Draco had most definitely been found…But he was most certainly _not_ okay. And the moment Harry heard the news he found himself spacing out, hearing nothing else, and sinking into a dark, black void.

Draco had been so fucking stupid. Harry had found himself very angry at Draco. He just never knew where to draw the line. He would do anything ruthlessly and almost as though he cared about no one else but himself. And Harry really was starting to wonder if that was true. He was starting to question Draco in many respects.

Harry dressed himself quickly and looked at the time. The portkey that had been setup for him when Jill left was set to go off in an hour, and would take him straight to St. Mungo's. So, for now it was merely his job to sit around and wait. But just as he turned to descend back to the Common Room so that he could sit peacefully by the fireplace, Harry just happened to notice a purple envelope with the Hogwarts insignia seal addressed to him in slightly messy red ink right by his bed. Seizing it promptly off his nightstand, Harry quickly opened it, immediately unfolding the inserted parchment, and then read the inscribed message:

_Dear Harry,_

_Draco is going to be okay. He could have been severely injured but he was saved in time. When you return to school this evening, I must ask you not to share information regarding Draco's experience with anyone – Other than perhaps Mr. Weasley and Miss Granger. We are still very unsafe, Harry, and I must urge to express extreme care in all circumstances. The wizarding world is war and you are a large target Harry. Please be safe._

_Sincerely,_

_Albus Dumbledore_

Harry was relieved to know Draco was okay but he felt very angry with Draco still in an indescribable way. He felt so betrayed and forgotten by Draco. At the moment, he did not have it in him to forgive Draco. He felt miserable at the mere thought of Draco.

* * *

Hermione kissed Ron again. His love kept her sane after the trauma she had gone through and she felt as though only Ron could correct it all. She lied naked next to him, curled in the bed sheets. She never wanted to leave him. Ron had given her so much in the recent past.

"I love you, Ron," Hermione said to him. "I always will."

"I love you, too."

"Do you think Harry's okay?" Hermione inquired suddenly. He had gone on a search to find Malfoy.

"Yeah, he's all right. We'd had known by now if he wasn't. Had to find Malfoy, didn't he?" Ron responded, trying to calm Hermione.

"Yes, I suppose so. You know, we may have to face the fact that I don't think those two are just friends," Hermione said, as though trying to bring it up casually.

"WHAT? Malfoy and Harry? Hermione, you've lost it," Ron said, looking absolutely disgusted.

"No, I haven't, Harry. I've watched them. They're not just friends. You've noticed it, too. I know it," Hermione said smartly.

"You're saying Harry is gay," Ron said uncomfortably, looking at Hermione as though she was a small child.

"I never said that, Ron."

* * *

Draco sat alone in his bed at St Mungo's pondering the situation he had obviously gotten himself into. There were no words to describe the anger he had felt when he realized he had been caught and imprisoned at St. Mungo's and would be remaining there for at least a fortnight. And upon returning to Hogwarts, he would then be formally punished academically wise.

Every so often he felt the need to simply yell out to express his anger but it would do him no good. And when he was beginning to really let it all get to him; something happened that potentially would help his mood. Someone who he had wanted to see had come. Harry walked in the room.

Draco immediately smiled upon seeing Harry. Some relief poured through him. He was so sick of being lectured and finally someone he loved and wouldn't be angry at him was with him. "Harry," Draco said. "Thank God it's you and not Dumbledore again."

Harry didn't respond immediately. In fact, Harry looked very odd indeed. He didn't look especially happy at all. He looked tense, in fact. He looked unsure of what to say at all. Harry turned away.

"What's the matter, Harry?" Draco inquired, feeling uncomfortable.

And then Harry turned around and Draco saw someone quite angry.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN WHAT'S THE MATTER, DRACO? YOU ALMOST DIED. I'VE BEEN GOING THROUGH THE SAME SHIT YOU HAVE AND THEN YOU RUN OFF AND LEAVE ME BEHIND AND ALMOST GET YOURSELF KILLED!" Harry screamed furiously, letting out anger which he'd kept inside a while too long.

Draco was stunned at first. But then he felt very, very angry. Who at all gave Harry the right to talk to him like that? Draco had made one mistake, but Harry had made just as many, if not more. He couldn't believe he had been longing to see Harry for Harry to do this to him. Draco was furious.

"Well, fuck you, then," Draco finally just hissed softly, yet the coldness of his tone remained audible as ever nevertheless. "Get away from me then."

And Draco only was like this when he was very angry. He felt out of control yet complete control in his emotions all at once. He made a sly smile at Harry pretending he didn't care though truthfully inside he was shredding apart. He really did want Harry to leave. He would not break apart.

"So that's it, then? Going to run away from things as usual, Draco?" Harry said exasperatedly, sounding hopeless.

"Is that what I always do, Potter? Fuck off. I can't believe I've wasted so much bloody time on you," Draco scoffed in a complete whisper, but he knew Harry had heard him.

"That's how you want it to be, then," Harry said, clearly unable to show his anger and confusion written all over his face. "Then have it your way."

And Harry stormed off.

* * *

Harry was feeling a mix of many feelings inside of him and he was doing a poor job of hiding it. He had returned to Hogwarts and though many attempted to talk to him, he stormed away in fury. He felt shitty. He felt like he hadn't come across to Draco right, but then he also felt Draco didn't want to understand Harry either. He had been worried for his sake. And Draco had appreciated it by breaking up with him.

Harry couldn't believe it. And he honestly didn't think they'd get back together. The look on Draco's face had told him everything. He had seen nothing but fury. And he knew it would remain like that. Harry felt so angry how the situation had turned out.

But Harry knew it was true – And he knew he had to accept it and find some way to deal with it. And he needed to stop making it so obvious how he was feeling – But he couldn't help it. He wished he could just talk to someone who would understand…

"Harry," said a voice. It was Hermione. "Are you all right? How's Malfoy?"

"He's _fine_!" Harry responded. "And so am I."

"You don't sound fine. What's bothering you, Harry?" Hermione inquired in a concerned fashion, going to sit next to him.

Harry, at first, didn't want to say anything. But if there was one person in the world he could open up to romantically it was definitely Hermione. "Draco broke up with me," Harry said in a very low tone, not looking at Hermione.

"I _knew_ it!" Hermione said smilingly, but it went away fast. "Sorry. Oh, Harry, that's awful, honestly. Oh, _Harry_."

"Yeah," Harry said hollowly, not knowing how to respond. "It is."

"Do you still love him?" Hermione asked bluntly.

"Of course I do," Harry said. "We went through a lot."

And Harry told her everything – How he and Draco met, how their romance began, about all the nights out…The works.

"Wow, Harry, wow. Well, you really did go about it all wrong," Hermione said in a rather motherly tone, gasping with awed surprise.

"WHAT? Hermione, he took ecstasy!" Harry said indignantly.

"Yes, Harry, but he knows he made a mistake and he most likely didn't need you rubbing it in his face. He's probably feeling very worried, and he was probably really happy to see you, and for you to react like that probably really upset him. He probably saw you as an escape from all the lecturing. You should have tried to understand why he did what he did," Hermione explained calmly to Harry.

Harry felt absolutely stupid. "Hmm. Hermione, you're so weird."

* * *

**Author's Note**: Alas, they break up. Do you think they'll get back together? Either way at least Draco's okay for now, though, right? In the next chapter, which will be up in time for New Year's hopefully, we'll see more of Jill, Christmas, more of the Weasleys, Ginny does something HUGE, Draco's mom makes an appearance, and drunken people. Should be fun.


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter Nineteen

_And I want you._

_And blessed are the broken and I beg you,_

_No loneliness, no misery is worth you._

Draco sat in a class with ten other teenagers with a man only a few years older than him teaching them the importance of being drug free. Draco had never remembered being so bored in his life. He lacked any interest whatsoever in listening to the man speak. The man had been some kind of crack addict, and Draco had done drugs responsibly for the past half year or so – Well, minus the time that put him in the class in the first place.

The part he hated the most was being so bored. He was a Gemini after all, and boredom was his ultimate downfall. And boredom made him think of Harry, a topic he hated thinking about. It had been a couple weeks since he had broken up with Harry and he hadn't seen him since. It was December now, and Christmas was coming – And he would be leaving the hellhole the next day.

Draco looked at the clock and realized he had another half hour in here and then he had History of Magic for two hours and then the day would finally be over. He hated the stupid schedule they had for him at the hospital, but he had to keep up with school – It was required. The classes were probably easier at the hospital, involving more independent work anyway. But he hadn't made any real friends because he would feel awkward making friends with the drug addicts – He felt too good for them regardless.

Draco felt terribly depressed. He felt trapped inside some kind of nightmare. And that basically was what it was. He woke up everyday, friendless and unhappy, to repeat the same cycle and there was nothing he could do. He must be in hell, he was sure of that. Even when he got out he didn't see a much brighter future – But there was nothing he could do about that.

As for visitors, Jill had visited him a couple times and so had Ginny but he hadn't seen Harry since they broke up. The worst part was tomorrow the person that had to sign him out was the one person he thought he'd never have to see.

Harry had been hanging with Ron and Hermione constantly – just like old times. It was almost break finally. He had been feeling shitty lately, but he had been trying to focus all his energy on his schoolwork because if he didn't he would have some kind of breakdown and he knew he didn't need that. He was trying to keep his mind off Draco, but he had to admit at least to himself he was very worried about him. He actually felt sorry for Draco, trapped in the hospital for the last couple of weeks. But he tried hard not to.

Ron was already encouraging him to see someone else. He sounded very grateful to learn his best friend wasn't gay, but in fact without a specific sexuality. Or at least that was how Harry chose to describe himself. And with that, Ron had a number of girls in mind for Harry. Harry was sort of interested because he thought it'd help him move on from Draco, but another part of him was completely uninterested and would remain that way for awhile.

He and Ginny had also been hanging out a lot lately. They rarely spoke of Draco but when they did it was always quite awkward and emotional. Other than that, Harry immensely enjoyed Ginny's presence. It was strange because prior to the two weeks without Draco, it had always been Draco who had enjoyed hanging with Ginny a lot.

Harry was excited because as usual he would be spending his Christmas holiday with the Weasleys. Hermione would join them after spending some time at home as well. Harry did wonder a bit where Draco would spend Christmas, but he was trying to do the whole not caring thing – And it was unsuccessful so far. He was sure Ginny would want him to come, but Harry wondered how awkward it would be between him and Draco, and if Draco would even want to be around him.

Ginny had visited Draco a couple times and she had let Harry know that Draco was pretty miserable, hating life. Harry had expected hearing that would make him happy, but it did not. In reality, Harry was simply still in love with Draco and it pained him more than ever. Secretly, he hoped when Draco came back they would get back together.

But he doubted it.

Draco awoke the day of his departure from the addiction ward in a bit of a better mood. He was very apprehensive, though, of returning to Hogwarts. If he was to screw up again, he'd be gone for good most likely. He was going to have to be good and it wouldn't be too hard considering he would go back friendless – Minus Ginny anyway.

Draco was escorted from his room to see his therapist and caretaker one last time. When the nurse opened the door, Draco walked in to find his mother and the therapist there waiting for him. Draco was not shocked because he knew she had to be there because he was underage, but he was still a bit taken back. It was obvious she didn't want to be there. She would not look at him.

Draco took his seat and Dr. Caldwell smiled at him. "You've made great progress, Draco. I'm proud of you," he said promptly.

Draco nodded in recognition. "Yeah."

"It is amazing that you even survived that horrible overdose, Draco. You're very lucky to be alive. It was a miracle," he continued on a serious note and Draco, looking at his mother realized something. The charm she had placed on him had aided him! " … Sign here, Draco. And Ms. Malfoy, you sign here … And there …. And there …."

And so it went like this with a few lectures for an hour or so. And then Caldwell told him he had arranged a portkey for him as his mother, of course, planned to do absolutely nothing with Draco.

"Thank you for the waste of time, Draco," Narcissa finally said to him, glaring. "You know I would not be here unless I absolutely had to do. And mark my words, boy – _You know very well why you survived that_," she said, glowing at him, and speaking the last part in a whisper so Caldwell did not hear.

"Harry, you're coming and that's final!" Ginny said to Harry.

"He _hates_ me," said Harry, but not totally believing it himself.

"Stop being stupid, Harry," Ginny said unkindly.

And she forced him to come.

Draco arrived at Hogsmeade Station and had to walk the rest of the way to Hogwarts and promptly upon arrival had to see Professor Dumbledore. But he was quite surprised to see Ginny waiting for him with someone he definitely did not expect – Harry, looking away.

"Draco, I'm so happy you're finally out of that place!" Ginny said to Draco and hugged him, but then whispered to him, "_though it was bloody stupid of you, dimwit_."

Draco ignored this. He was feeling very uncomfortable. "What's _he_ doing here?" Draco didn't want to come off horrible, but he knew in someway he had to do.

"Shut up, Draco. You know you want to see him," Ginny said bluntly. Draco went a horrible shade of red.

"I'd rather die!" Draco said, but in an almost unconvincing tone.

And Ginny was forced to walk between them without anyone speaking.

"Your progress at St. Mungo's was most impressive," said Dumbledore, beaming at Draco, obviously feeling the punishment was good enough and he need not mistreat Draco further. "I am very pleased."

Draco did not speak, but nodded. Dumbledore surveyed him carefully, obviously trying to read his expression carefully. But neither of them spoke. Dumbledore smiled at Draco gracefully. "But you do understand that this kind of behavior cannot, and will not be tolerated at all further."

"Yes, sir," Draco responded, almost totally dully. Dumbledore did not persist.

"On a lighter note, Jillian has invited you for the Christmas holidays," Dumbledore said happily.

Draco actually looked at Dumbledore and smiled, but tried not to look too pleased in a pathetic and ungraceful way. "Well, that's nice isn't it?"

Christmas Eve was going wonderfully for Harry for the most part. He missed Draco very much, but he was also enjoying his time with his best friend, Ron, as well as Ginny and the others. Fred and George were being their normal selves – Complete comedians and Harry loved that. The whole Weasley family was home for Christmas and though the house was quite crammed, Harry loved it.

"Aw, Percy, isn't it nice to take some time off finally?" Mr. Weasley said over dinner in a very relieved tone.

"Well, of course it nice to come home and spend proper time with mother and my siblings, father, though there is much to be done at work with all the current mayhem going on," said Percy in a serious tone.

"Definitely not a happy time in the community," Mr. Weasley responded darkly.

"Oh, come on, dad, stop worrying so much about that You-Know-Who riffraff, it's Christmas!" Fred said in a festive tone.

"Fred!" Mrs. Weasley said in a scolding tone, but she didn't sound too upset.

"Fred's right, mum! Lighten up. I'm sure even He-Who-Must-Not-Named takes Christmas off," George said.

"Yes, I'm sure He-Who-Must-Not-Named is seeing family in Yorkshire and spending time at home for the holidays," Mrs. Weasley said sarcastically but smiling.

"Does You-Know-Who have any family?" Ron asked, sounding curious.

Harry was very curious about this as well. No one had exactly talked much about this.

"Not anymore certainly," Bill explained lightly to his brother seeing his parents' reluctance. "You all know he killed his father's family and his mother's family was dead before he was born."

"Oh, right," Ron said. "Well no wonder he's such a nutter."

"So when's Hermione coming in, Ron?" asked Ginny, obviously thinking the subject of Voldemort might be sensitive for Harry.

"The day after the day after Christmas," Ron said quickly. "How'd Voldemort's mum's parents die?"

"That's quite enough, Ron," Mrs. Weasley said sharply.

"He-Who-Must-Not-Named's grandpa was a murderer and got the dementor's kiss and his grandma died a year after He-Who-Must-Not-Named's mum was born from some disease. His uncles and aunts I believe he killed himself," Charlie explained in a dark note.

"Such a nice bloke," said Fred sarcastically, trying to stop the bitterness in the conversation.

"Quite," said Harry in a very dark tone.

Draco sat with one of Jill's drunker friends Christmas night. It was a very attractive woman of no older than twenty five. She was having avid conversation with him – She spoke of many things, though she often seemed very distracted in things but in the end she seemed more and open and happy. But Draco became bored – He had not been allowed any drinks.

He went to the guest room at one point and went to Jill's phone. He dialed the number Ginny had given him before term ended and coincidentally, it was Ginny who picked up.

"Hello?" she said, sounding like she had just laughed at something.

"Hey, it's me," said Draco.

"Who's me?" asked Ginny sounding skeptical.

"You know who the hell it is," Draco responded, annoyed.

"Oh, hey Draco," Ginny said cheerfully. "How's your Christmas been going?"

"Not bad at all, really – But I've missed you," Draco said, sounding unashamed. "Come over!"

"What –?" she began.

"Just come over and see me for a while tonight," Draco said.

"Aren't you far?" asked Ginny, sounding confused.

"Dumbledore's got Jill hooked up to floo powder because of circumstances," Draco explained.

"Oh, right! Hmm, well, I'm sure I could come over in a bit – When everyone goes away for a bit," Ginny said, chuckling.

And they spoke for another half hour.

Harry gulped down a glass of champagne without even wincing. It was with his third glass or so, and he was beginning to feel a bit woozy. Ron was joining him for another right after.

"Cheers mate!" Ron said at the toast for the fourth drink.

The two of them took a bit longer for this drink and things were looking a bit unclear to Harry. Harry smiled at Ron who was tumbling back and forth. "Stop that, Ron," said Harry, giggling. "You're acting all craaaazy!" Harry said, watching Ron back and forth.

Ron looked confused but smile. "I'm not acting like a baby!"

Draco and Ginny sat on the hill behind the church in Godric's Hollow. They were sitting next to each other, looking at the stars. "That's my star," Draco said to Ginny at some point. "Harry and I named it so one night a long time ago."

Draco knew a long time ago was on some random drunk night they had spent together, but to him, that was another life. Ginny did not respond immediately, but she grabbed Draco's hand and squeezed tightly. She obviously had no words to tell him.

"How is he?" Draco asked quietly, knowing he did not have to specify who.

"Happy, actually," Ginny said, but then looked as though she had said the wrong thing. "He's just glad to be spending Christmas with us and all. Do you miss him?"

"No, of course not," said Draco and looked away.

"Shut up, Draco," Said Ginny and took away her hand, though she smiled playfully at him. "You're such a liar."

"Why would I miss a messy-haired, everyone loves me, silly and dumb, melodramatic hero boy?" said Draco, not too convincingly, though very much trying to sound it.

"Because you're the same way!" Ginny said, laughing.

"I do _not _have messy hair!" Draco yelled, getting up, indignantly, and touching his very much delicate hair.

Ginny laughed more then ever at Draco.

Harry found Ginny coming home after he had thrown up in the bathroom. He came out to seeing Ginny walking out of the fireplace. Harry still felt shaky and unfocused, though happy was not necessarily the feeling at all.

"Where have you been?" Harry asked her immediately.

"Nowhere," Ginny said immediately. "I'm fine aren't I?"

Harry could barely focus on Ginny.

"You're drunk," Ginny said dully. "God, Harry."

"I'm not drunk," Harry said, but didn't press the subject. "You look great."

Ginny looked at him unconvinced. "Yeah, everyone does when you're drunk."

"No, I'm serious!" Harry said indignantly. "Come here, Ginny."

Ginny didn't know how it happened. But she let old feelings take her over – The feelings from when she was ten years old that had never really gone away. And she knew it probably meant nothing to him, Harry being a drunk bastard at the moment, but something inside her could not resist him. And she grasped his body and she kissed him. And he touched her – And she allowed it, unable to speak, unable to demand he stop in any way. And stop he did not. He caressed her body in a gentle fashion for someone who was drunk.

"Ginny … Ginny …" he spoke in a soft tender voice. His breath smelled of alcohol. His hand was on her breasts and Ginny closed her eyes, scared of the horrible crime of passion she was committing.

When Harry opened his eyes and saw the burning light of the sun outside, he had no idea where he was or how he had ended up there. All he could feel was an ache all over his body. His head felt near explosion and he just felt a lot of weigh and ache on him. He could feel he was wearing no clothes and when he looked over he nearly had a heart attack to find who was next to him – Ginny, fast asleep.

Harry gasped deeply and literally rolled out of the bed onto the floor. He found his clothes, all around the floor and Ginny's. He had no recollection of any of this. What had he done? Well, it was quite obvious what he had done. And a million things ran through his head. _How could this have happened_?

He just had no idea and he couldn't have felt more uncomfortable. Thank God Ginny wasn't awake. Harry ran to the bathroom immediately. He looked in the mirror. He looked like shit – Very pale and messy. And then he felt a surge in his stomach and then his throat and ran to the toilet, just missing up, and throwing up a lot.

Harry knew it was going to be a long day. He just couldn't believe he had slept with Ginny. What if she was pregnant or something? What exactly had happened? A part of him wanted to run over to Ginny and wake her up but the other part of him, a much larger part of him, was much too humiliated.

Harry jumped in the shower cleaning himself much more than usual for whatever reason. He felt very dirty. But he was quite surprised when he felt the shower curtain open and Harry almost fell back with a gasp when he saw Ginny hop in the shower with him.

Author's Note: So sorry about the delay. This chapter… I dunno it was written very slowly, but consistently. I really like this chapter because it changes so much doesn't it? Will Draco find out? Haha.


	20. Chapter 20

**Author's Note:** Does Draco find out the secret? Can Ginny and Harry look each other in the eye? Is Christmas Day awesome? Find out!

* * *

Chapter Twenty

_Crash and burn —_

_All the stars explode tonight._

_How'd you get so desperate?_

_How'd you stay alive?_

Harry let out a small shriek and jumped out of the shower in panic. He ran back to the bedroom, put on his clothes quicker than he could have ever remembered doing so before, and then ran speeding out of the room. He wanted to run out of the Burrow screaming. He couldn't believe no one had found them sleeping together! He nearly ran into Ron and then let out a real shriek.

"Harry, what the hell is wrong with you?" Ron said impatiently, startled, looking at him in a disapproving way and as though Harry was crazy.

"Long night ..." Harry began, knowing the truth was the last thing he would tell him. Ron peered at him closely and Harry was shaking a bit. He just knew Ron knew what would happen. He was going to slaughter him and bury his body in the lake...

"Haha, you fell asleep in the bathroom, didn't you? I was wondering where you were when I woke up!" Ron was laughing innocently now and Harry had to look away from him, only stealing glances surreptitiously when he could. After waiting a moment for Harry to answer Ron, sounding slightly uncomfortable, asked awkwardly, "Are you hung over, mate?"

"Uh, yeah," Harry said a bit too quickly, hating himself for lying to his best friend. "I reckon I like pot much better, mate."

Ron grinned at Harry. "Never tried it…When did _you_?" Ron asked him, wondering how his best friend had tried something like that without him knowing.

Harry looked at Ron and blinked.

"Oh," Ron said darkly in a voice suddenly hollowed, looking away from Harry, and then abruptly went to the kitchen. "Have some breakfast."

And there was quite a bit of a bitter tone for the rest of breakfast, unsurprisingly.

* * *

Draco awoke still high as a kite. It hadn't taken much to find pot in the village. He knew he shouldn't be doing drugs, but it was just pot of course…Nothing too serious, right? But he smoked so much he had literally passed out on the floor right by the bed in the guestroom. He prayed to God Jill didn't know he had been getting high because he would have been in so much trouble. He still felt high, yes...But he could conduct himself much better high than many other people, like, per say,_Harry_.

No, not him ... He didn't want to think about that fucker. And then all his emotions sunk down, and he began feeling immensely depressed and felt like crying. But then he looked at the comforter on his bed and saw all the shiny colors and burst out laughing all the different colors on it ― blue, red, white ― it was amazing how the colors just mixed and were so shiny and bright! Draco felt positively_delighted_ by this!

After a delayed moment, Draco finally got up, feeling all the weight on his body ... He could truly appreciate every pound on his body. He had to find balance for a second. Then he jumped onto the bed and felt the excitement before hitting the bed hard. It almost hurt a little, but the adrenaline rush was amazing enough that the slight discomfort subsided immediately.

"Wee!" Draco yelped jovially, quite unlike himself, bouncing. Then he heard Jill's voice and screamed.

* * *

Ginny walked into the kitchen, hair still wet from the shower. She looked pale as ever, and would not look at Harry, who was looking out to the garden through the window. Ron didn't seem to notice this obvious tension, thank God. "Where the hell are Mom and Dad?" demanded Ginny, sounding more upset than she needed to be. "It's Christmas morning!"

Harry had not even wondered about that. In fact, he had almost forgotten it was Christmas morning. "Yeah, did you see them when you woke up, Ron?"

"No! They left a note saying they had urgent Ministry business! And presents, they hid them somehow!" panicked Ron, looking livid and horribly depressed. Ron looked shocked to see Ginny and Harry look at him blankly, obviously not thinking about presents. Before Ron could inquire about this, the phone rang.

Ginny jumped as Ron went to get it. "DON'T TOUCH!" Ginny threatened, thinking it'd be Draco and ran to get the phone, hating herself. She picked it up. "Hello?" And as she answered, Ginny's other older brothers came running down the stairs all excited about the presents that were nowhere to be found.

"Hey!" It was Draco, speaking in a euphoric, slightly slurring voice that sounded distorted and distant. "Giiiiiiiiiiinny, I luuuuuuuufffffffffff you," said Draco's giggling voice.

"Oh my God, are you on drugs?" Ginny asked irritably, frustrated and trying to be quiet, but Harry heard and rushed over.

"WHAT?" Harry demanded. Ron, Charlie, Bill, and the twins were chatting animatedly and were not noticing them. "Is it fucking Draco?"

Harry did not care about the embarrassment if Draco was back on drugs. He could NOT be back on drugs ... He just couldn't believe it. How could anyone be so selfish? Harry grabbed the phone out of Ginny's hand. Startled, Ginny froze and looked completely vulnerable and without a guard. "Are you on drugs, Draco?" Harry asked quietly.

Draco didn't immediately respond, but Harry could hear him sounding distressed. "Just pot," said Draco at last, apparently calming himself. "Besides, you're not my boyfriend anymore."

Harry was slightly relieved but he hanged up. He looked at Ginny. "We're going over there," he said firmly, forgetting all about their one-night stand for now.

"All right," Ginny said cooperatively, effortlessly conceding with a sigh.

* * *

Draco was lying on the bed, staring at the ceiling with his arms and legs spread out, letting the high go down. Relaxed, he was starting to feel a familiar mellow feeling, like a great day at the park as a child and coming home. Jill had come in to ask him to get ready, and he told her fine, not looking conspicuous. They would be going to a brunch with her church friends and opening some presents when they got home.

But Draco was quite shocked when two people walked in his room without knocking. And it was not Jill, nor was it her parents. In walked two of the most unlikely people: Ginny and Harry, looking stern and paternal. Draco almost laughed. It wasn't as though he was necessarily unhappy to see them. But it was more a laugh of surprise.

"What in the bloody hell are you doing here?" Draco burst out; he was trying to sound upset that Harry was there. "I don't recall inviting you."

"Oh, shut up, Draco. We're the ones who'll do the talking ... What the hell do you think you're doing on drugs, mate? You just got out of rehab!" Ginny yelled at him, sounding mad. Harry just stood there looking livid.

"So fucking selfish, Draco," Harry finally pouted through gritted teeth, fuming, although sadness still tore him apart nonetheless. "…Can't even love his own self."

"IT WAS JUST POT, DAMN IT!" Draco protested indignantly.

"Today," Harry said. "Tomorrow it'll be ecstasy again."

"Why do you care? We broke up, Harry, thanks to you," Draco retorted cruelly.

"Why do you think I care?" Harry asked quietly.

"Because you're a right idiot," Draco said, but was looking away.

"Yeah, I am," said Harry, but he wasn't looking at Draco...He was looking at Ginny. He looked miserable.

* * *

Harry understood the hypocrisy of his actions, but after the brunch that Ginny and Harry went to with Draco, the three of them went for a walk in the village and in a quarry off to the side, the three of them smoked the remainder of the pot Draco had. Harry's defense was he and Ginny had needed it after the stress of last night. Draco, though, had no excuse...

Harry felt he could say almost anything with no shame…Except, of course, about last night. He knew better, still. Harry grabbed Draco's arms and started telling him how much he loved him. "I love you, Draco! Why are you _so_ mean to me all the time now?" Harry begged, stressing his words. Draco looked at Harry for a moment in total seriousness and then burst out laughing.

Ginny looked at Draco and started laughing too, though she probably hadn't heard what was going on. Then Harry looked at both of them and started laughing too. Harry lied back on the grass and smiled at the sky.

"I want a boyfriend," Ginny began saying. "Fuck and run, fuck and run, even when I was twelve ..."

"Twelve?" Draco looked at her, totally in utmost shock, not even blinking for a few moments. "You had sex at twelve?"

"Oh my God, I can't believe you just asked me that! God you're so mean!" Ginny said, sounding emotionally scarred. Draco looked at her, went red, and started laughing. "It's not fu―" but then Ginny started laughing too.

Harry was singing a Muggle tune. Ginny was looking at Draco's beautiful body and went and grabbed him by the collar and pulled him nose to nose with her. Harry didn't notice. Ginny looked like she wanted nothing but Draco.

"Ginny, love, you scared me!" Draco said, sounding exasperated by such a sudden touch.

"I want to fuck you until your dick is blue," Ginny seduced him, and took her tongue and licked Draco's forehead.

Draco started laughing. "Haha, puppy!" he said at first, but as she started loosening his button, he realized what she said. "No ... Stop, Ginny, seriously ..." He said, more alarmed now ... It wasn't quite like being drunk.

Harry looked over and looked mad. "Get off him, Ginny!" And Ginny screamed and tried running up the quarry and fell down and started rolling down. All three of them laughed harder than ever.

* * *

On a lighter note, after the whole pot "incident", Draco decided to spend the rest of Christmas at the Burrow. Jill was fine with this, after she gave out their presents that is, so the three of them returned via floo powder to the Burrow soon after. All the Weasleys were waiting anxiously for them upon their arrival. Their anticipation was slightly surprising for the three, especially since even Percy, Arthur and Molly had all been up expecting them at any moment. At first they each suspected they must be in trouble but luckily within mere seconds this fear was relieved.

"Where have you lot been? Presents are waiting!" Fred and George said at once, sounding greatly excited.

The welcoming atmosphere was instantly enthusing. The three of them smiled, radiantly too — a true account would take a while.

"Ginny, how'd you get that bruise on your leg? It looks awful!" Molly said, looking worried.

"It's nothing, Mum," Ginny began automatically, annoyed, but Harry and Draco began laughing, and so did she.

* * *

Draco and Ginny sat alone in her room later on that day when everyone else was playing Quidditch outside. They had been talking about Harry, and Draco wasn't all too uncomfortable, and admitted it was nice spending Christmas with him. Ginny did not tell him about her and Harry. She felt it was best that way.

"I just keep reliving the siege in my head," Ginny admitted at some point later. "Everyone thought we were going to die."

"But you didn't," Draco said flatly. "You've got to put it behind you somehow."

Ginny understood his sympathy was limited as he had lost a lot more in the siege than anyone else. "I suppose," Ginny said. The siege wasn't really bothering her. It was the fact she had slept with a guy she had crushed on for years, the wonder boy whom she'd only recently been able to build up the mental strength to just speak to like a normal person, too ironically. She had never _truly_ let go of it...And yet, still, Ginny could never, ever truly have him. She swallowed painfully. "Do you ever just hate being alive?"

Draco let Ginny put her head on his shoulder. "Every day, just about."

"What do you think it's going to be like when we all go back to school?" Ginny asked curiously, trying to change the subject after a moment of silence.

"Weird as hell," Draco said plainly. "I shan't run away again, though."

"All right, but promise it to me, okay?" Ginny asked him seriously. She grabbed his hand and squeezed it.

"I promise," Draco said assuredly, and he began stroking her curls affectionately.

* * *

Dumbledore stopped by for a visit later on that evening. He came to see the whole family, but he paid Ginny, Draco, and Harry a separate personal visit upstairs to speak to them. When he saw them all together, getting along well, he glowed at them. They all blushed in a humiliated fashion.

"Nice to see the three of you all getting on," Dumbledore said. "I see Christmas is treating you well."

The three of them nodded at him. Dumbledore sat down without being asked. "The school year may prove quite difficult, I shall not be dishonest. Security will be much worse now. Aurors will be stationed at Hogwarts the remaining of the year."

Harry took this as no surprise. "Right," he responded. "No surprise."

"But I must ask you three to keep out of trouble...And I believe I'll have to tell Miss Granger and Weasley the exact same thing," Dumbledore said severely, though after he winked at them.

* * *

"YOU DID WHAT?" boomed Hermione's voice.

Ginny had taken Hermione to her room while everyone else was downstairs the following day when she arrived... And then she told her what happened between her and Harry. "Hermione," she began, but then she became quiet.

"DO YOU REALIZE HOW ANGRY DRACO WILL BE WITH YOU WHEN HE FINDS OUT? I THOUGHT YOU WERE OVER HARRY! AND HE WAS DRUNK! OH MY GOODNESS, GINNY! HONESTLY!" yelled Hermione, but not loud enough for anyone to hear.

Now Ginny wished she hadn't told. But when Hermione noticed Ginny so somber, she calmed down a bit. Ginny did not speak for a bit. But when she did, she was near tears. "It's just ... I had liked him for so long ... I couldn't resist him. That would have been impossible. When he told me he wanted me, it didn't matter that he was drunk, I couldn't throw that away," Ginny said, now truthfully crying. "I've been lying to Draco all day!"

Hermione put her arm around Ginny's shoulder and held her in a motherly fashion. "Well, yes you have been lying to him ... But err, you know ..." Hermione could not really say anything to make Ginny feel better as she really hated what she had done. Hermione felt utterly uncomfortable.

"I get it, Hermione. I'm a rotten slut," confessed Ginny, self-loathing inflecting her voice, in tears though she wasn't saying that out of self-pity. "Are you going to tell Draco?"

Hermione looked away at this. "No," said Hermione. "Draco's not my friend, you are. But if he is your friend, I think you should tell him."

Ginny said nothing. She knew that would never happen, and absolutely wanted to keep that night a burning secret. Ginny would have to force herself not to act on any actions...It would just never happen again — Plain and simple. She had learned from it, and it was over. She didn't need to tell Draco, did she?

"You're not going to tell him, are you?" Hermione asked, sounding unhappy.

Ginny still remained quiet as ever. "No," she said. "Sorry, but I'm not going to ruin everything between them that's starting to repair itself..."

But part of it was very selfish, and Ginny (guiltily) knew this.

* * *

Harry took Draco out to a deserted wood near the Burrow where there was no one. And he had brought firewhisky along to prove he had gone with Harry to _drink_, not anything else. He wasn't exactly sure what was going on between them, but Draco wouldn't admit he wanted him back...

Harry sat down against the trunk of a tree, ignoring the moss near his face. Draco sat against the trunk on the tree opposite. Neither of them spoke for a few moments, simply taking in the new atmosphere.

"So how long do you think it'll take before they notice us gone?" asked Draco.

"They probably already have," said Harry, grinning.

"I can hear them screaming Voldemort's come and snatched you up," said Draco, laughing harder.

"Very funny," said Harry, though he was grinning. "Pass me a firewhisky. Let's get this going..."

* * *

Ron had joined Hermione and Ginny in Ginny's room and they were discussing school and homework. Ginny wouldn't tell her brother any of what had gone on between Harry and her if someone had threatened her with _Avada Kedavra._

"Ginny, you shouldn't date," advised a clearly biased Ron condescendingly, when the subject had changed to dating. "I mean, really."

"Well thank God I didn't ask for your advice," retorted Ginny. Truthfully, she needed some sort of rebound after all this. "Maybe I'll go out with Draco!"

Now she was just irking her brother. "WHAT? I'm angry enough he's in my house, taking up my best friend!" he exclaimed, letting out the frustration he had been holding in for so long.

"Just kidding!" Ginny teased, and she cried out laughing. So did Hermione a moment later, which cajoled Ginny to run with it. "Maybe you can dump my brother for Draco!"

Ron threw a pillow at Ginny. She was giggling so she hit him with one of her cotton pillows but in the process also hit Hermione. And then Hermione hit Ginny with a pillow. And then Ron hit Ginny. And then Ginny hit Hermione on purpose.

And it was war.

* * *

Draco swallowed down his fourth firewhisky and lied down against the hard, earthy ground. He felt dizzy yet happy. He felt a headache coming on but he didn't care. He felt bliss. He felt great and felt no shame.

"You know, the hospital sucked," Draco remarked cynically. Harry was shocked as he had only had two and wasn't quite drunk. Draco had never mentioned the hospital. "It was no fun, buddy."

"I bet," Harry said, barely concealing a chuck, hoping Draco would continue.

"The classes made me feel so _stoopid_!" Draco said stupidly (ironically), and Harry laughed his head off. Draco attempted to get up, not balancing too well at all. "But that's what they're for!"

Harry hadn't a clue what Draco was talking about. Draco trying to walk towards him tripped and fell on top of Harry. Harry caught him easily. Draco smelled strongly of alcohol which Harry would have no more of. He was scare he'd leak out what he and Ginny had done...

"When you look with your eyes, everything's so nice," said Draco. "And when you look again, it still is!"

"Okay, Draco, buddy," Harry said, laughing. "Kiss me."

And Draco did. He focused on that and not on drinking and it was a simple enough function to know exactly what he was doing. It was more of a wild kiss, though, not the expertise Harry had experienced with Draco on so many times. But Harry would excuse this time because Draco was very drunk.

Draco puts his arms on Harry's chest and began feeling him up. He took Harry's shirt and threw it off. Draco, smiling, took Harry's jeans and kept trying to pull them off. "Stay still," Draco said, and after a moment finally got them off. Harry was nearly naked besides his boxers with snitches on them.

And Draco began sliding those off too, about to bury his head somewhere down, down, _down_...

* * *

**Author's Endnote: **So I'm sure you're wondering if Draco will ever find out - And I think it's okay to say no. The truth is Ginny is probably right, it would only cause trouble. And besides, they weren't technically dating at the time .. As for the next chapter, things get back to the reality of the war again.


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter Twenty-One

_And I wait staring at the northern star  
I'm afraid it won't lead me anywhere  
He's so cold, he will ruin the world tonight..._

It was nearly Valentine's Day at Hogwarts and the recovery process from the tragedies was on its way - Though, of course, a full recovery would never happen. Upon return for the Winter Term, therapists and psychological experts on trauma that had studied wizarding wars, specifically on Voldemort's former reign, had come to Hogwarts to offer support to the distraught students who had suffered. Harry and Draco had had no real interest in joining, but Ginny and Hermione both forced them too. Ginny, Hermione, Ron, Draco, and Harry all ended up having therapy sessions of their own, slowly discussing all their feelings and trauma they had suffered. They were all rather surprised on how easy it was to open up.

The moment entering therapy, the therapist was required to perform the Vow of Secrecy, which reminded Harry of Secret-Keepers. The Vow of Secrecy, however, was simply about the person who had the vow placed on them. The Vow stated if the secrets told during the therapy sessions were revealed by the therapist, the therapist would die. It seemed horribly severe to Harry when he had first heard it - But according to Ron, wizards and witches choosing to go into the field already knew the terms and conditions of their career.

But on this day before Valentine's Day, Martha Smith, their therapist, decided that all of them should participate in a group therapy session. It was just as intense as Harry anticipated - Every single one of them had cried by the end of it. Hermione, when she revealed to them all how she had been tortured. Ron when revealing of being beaten and then watching his love being tortured. Harry could barely speak when he revealed the guilt he felt of the death of Cho and Seamus. Draco nearly had to leave the room when speaking of his father. Ginny spoke about waiting during the siege, in fear of death.

The only topic not discussed was the night Harry and Ginny slept together - A topic Harry or Ginny had chosen to take to their graves. When Martha Smith let them out, Harry was sure it might have been for the last time. Harry knew he'd never be in therapy for years - He was very conscious of what had happened to him, and in that respect, he could heal faster. Harry knew no denial. But Harry knew he had to go on.

He had to defeat Voldemort.

That very night, Harry was sitting on the top the North Tower, lying down, in a pensive state, hand in hand with Draco, who was watching him. Harry knew he could put it off no longer - It was time to conquer Voldemort. But he needed to have his armor - And for that, he needed Dumbledore. And possibly Jill - Anyone who could offer him any knowledge left behind that he needed to acquire to conquer the Dark Lord. Sirius was back in the country, away from hiding, safe in a home operated by the Fidelius Charm (Secret-Keeper being Dumbledore) and had agreed to meet Harry very willingly, as he hadn't seen Harry properly in months. As much as he wanted to see Sirius, he needed information. No matter what, no one would stop him.

Harry Potter would avenge his parents and defeat Lord Voldemort once and for all — At any costs.

* * *

"Harry, I've been awaiting this moment for many months - And I knew it would arrive very soon," said Dumbledore.

Harry was sitting in Dumbledore's creative and wonderful office, smiling at Fawkes, as he became comfortable. Jill was seated on his right, and Sirius on his left. Sirius and Harry had spent all of Valentine's Day together in Hogsmeade, Sirius mainly under the cloak. Draco had been upset, but he understood. Harry had promised to make up for it in the evening. Harry told Sirius quite a bit, but he held back more - He never told anything to him about his true relationship with Sirius, his pride would not allow it. But he told Sirius about the siege, about Blaze Zabini's death and being trapped in the dungeons, about the depths of Harry's despairs ...

But there was no more time for sympathy. There was only time for knowledge.

"You were waiting, Professor?" asked Harry, baffled by the thought that Dumbledore would simply wait for Harry to come around.

"Of course," said Dumbledore, twinkling at him. "If you were not prepared for you journey, you would have have been prepared to conquer it."

Harry nodded. "Professor, please tell me everything - The truth, only the truth - What will make me destroy Voldemort."

* * *

___ Luca Samanza whispered her last incantation as she held her baby in her arms - Knowing she would past shortly. She could not have more than an hour, she knew it. The delivery had no complications - Yet she was dying. But she had to look into her child's eyes ... He had his father's eyes, his father's beautiful looks. But his father ... who had abandoned her upon learning she was a witch, and went as far as attempting to kill her. He left her with child and a broken heart. She had abandoned her family who had never allowed her to ever see a Muggle, disowning her upon learning she was seeing the Muggle, Tom Riddle._

___Luca concentrated all her energy, every last bit of will in her, and continued whispering the incantation. Her son would not feel this pain ever ... Never. Her son would be protected._

___"Luca," spoke a voice. Luca finished the incantation, now perhaps moments from death, and looked up. It was a wizard she had known very well: Solen Dorse, The Minister of Magic himself, watching her. Had the Ministry already sensed the magic she placed on her son? It was true, perhaps none other had done what she had just done ... sacrificing everything ..._

___"Minister Dorse?" said Luca, in a very small voice._

___"What were you doing to your son, Luca?" asked Dorse._

___"What do you speak of?" retorted Luca._

___"Ms. Samanza, do not insult my intelligence. The Ministry has picked up traces of Dark Magic so high from you moments ago.I came myself. What have you done?" asked Dorse._

___"There is no dark magic," lied Luca. "It is this."_

___The Stone Orphanage Nurse came in, with a look of terror on her face. "Ma'am, I must ask you say your goodbyes ... Please ... There is nothing more I can do. The child needs to be cared for immediately."_

___"My son," said Luca, smiling for the last time._

___"I am a friend," said Dorse._

___The nurse had not seen him enter, but she did not appear to care. Luca gave her son to the nurse, losing almost all her energy in giving her baby to the nurse. "Care for him, please. Let me alone now with Dorse, please. I must tell him something ... before ... before .."_

___It would be over in minutes. "Ma'am ..."_

___"Go!" Luca said in a hoarse voice, and she did. "Minister, it is my ring. My father has cursed me with it."_

___Under her breath, Luca whispered one last incantation. She cursed the ring that traced her back to Salazar Slytherin himself._

___"Oh my," said Dorse, examining it. It now glowed red._

___"It is killing me," lied Luca. "Do not take my son, I command this. I do not want him to know of my past, not now. I want him raised here ... innocent of the wizarding world for now ... and its horrors ..Do not take him to my family ..."_

___Luca remembered it all ... Her depression at Hogwarts because of her hateful family ... Watching her family torture Muggles... Losing Tom, her only love...The Dementors giving her father the Dementor's kiss, finally ... Never having had a mother ... Her brother and sister's cruelty ..._

___"Tell the nurse to come back, please," said Luca, surprised of her energy._

___:I must remove the ring in time!" said Dorse._

___"There is no time ... Bring her here ..." said Luca, her eyes were slowly shutting ... She could feel her body slowing down .. slowly ..._

___The nurse came back in, panicked. "I don't understand - The delivery was fine - It is as though she has lost the will to live!" said the nurse, in obvious guilt to Dorse._

_"Tom Marvolo Riddle," Luca Samanza spoke her final words._

* * *

"How was this memory obtained?" asked Harry, amazed at what he had seen in the Pensieve.

"Have you not ever wondered why Voldemort did not die?" asked Dumbledore, very quietly.

Sirius and Jill looked at Harry, also seemingly baffled by the question. Harry had never thought to ask it ...

"The killing curse rebounded upon Voldemort, don't you think ti should have killed him?" asked Dumbledore, surveying Harry closely.

"In the cemetery, Voldemort said he took steps to stop mortal death," said Harry.

"He did. But he could never had done this if it had not been for his mother," said Dumbledore. "His mother is at so much fault for Lord Voldemort as he is today. Heartbroken and unloved, she performed the most horrible curse on her own son: She took away his ability to love. And with this, she killed herself. She had been dealt a life of torture, and she truly believed, I think, that she was helping her son."

"That's horrible!" said Jill, her hands covering her mouth.

"How could the bitch do that to her own son!?" Sirius said, outraged.

"She felt love corrupted all," said Dumbledore. "At the house of Samanza, I found the last traces of Luca in the house that has been abandoned for many years - Her diary."

Harry was awed. "What was in it?"

"No one had ever loved her. Her family was abusive, her only love was Tom, and her family hated her more for that. Luca tried to love all, and it destroyed her life. At school, she was treated as though vermin because of her family's reputation for the torture of Muggles."

"That's terrible," said Harry. "But to do that to your own son is still horrible."

"And Voldemort could not bare to die because he was so afraid," said Jill. "And he was always a sociopath, only wanting to spread more terror."

"Tom Riddle may have very well turned out the same," said Dumbledore intellectually. "Though she took away his power to love, she did not increase his will to hate necessarily. His hatred for Muggles came from his horrible father. No one had ever loved him - The ultimate counter-curse."

"No one?" asked Sirius.

"Not in time. Perhaps many of his Death Eaters do, but it is much too late. And that is why I state, it is in the power of the individual. Tom Riddle still chose his fate. The moment someone loved him, the incantation could have been lifted, if only slight, but he was full of hate - He ___chose_ to wreck havoc."

Harry didn't completely understand this; he still completely felt it was Luca's fault.

"What steps did he take?" asked Harry quietly.

"Tom sought out a method of eternity - The Stone of Light. A legendary stone in the pyramids of Egypt that would grant eternity. In school, he was obsessed. He sought it out. The legend said to obtain the Stone of Light, one must have no family left, no trace before him or her, and if necessary, eliminate their own families."

"So that's what Bill and the others were talking about!" exclaimed Harry. "He killed his aunt and uncle and all of his father's family!"

"Yes," said Dumbledore.

Sirius and Jill were in awe. Jill spoke first to Harry. "Your mother was a true Gryffindor. In the battle against Voldemort, she volunteered to become a spy. For months she relayed information to us. I told you this before, but I feel I must remind you. Lily blamed herself entirely. When Voldemort proclaimed to take you, immediately James and her went into hiding. James killed one of his most loyal followers - Draco's uncle, Arieus Malfoy, and that was the end of it."

"Draco never told me of that," Harry said, in shock.

"Draco never knew him," Dumbledore explained.

It was Sirius who spoke next. "Their marriage was secret, completely. When Voldemort realized Lily was a spy through Wormtail, he was livid to find out they were married. James had avidly fought against Voldemort. Voldemort then declared he'd take her child," he explained.

"Voldemort said my mum didn't have to die," said Harry. His eyes were burning, he looked at the ground.

"Voldemort doesn't understand love, Harry. He was to kill you, kill your father, and take back his servant," said Sirius. "And your mother died to save you. Voldemort could never, ___ever_ understand something that complicated, yet so simple."

There was a long quiet in the room.

"So the Stone of Light - Can he be defeated?" asked Jill, sounding very scared.

"No spell, no curse, nothing can prevent a human from dying. The Stone of Light does offer protection against the killing curse once, just ___once_. Your mother saved you the first time - Now you must finish what your mother started," finished Dumbledore.

"No matter what, Harry, we're coming with you!" said Hermione very firmly, once Harry had explained everything.

Harry agreed. They were going to stand by him no matter what - How could he protest?

"Yeah, mate - We'll fight. And if even we don't win, we'll take as many Death Eaters down as we can," said Ron passionately.

"Dumbledore doesn't feel I'm ready yet," said Harry angrily. "But people are dying!"

"Harry, he wants you to keep training hard! At the right time, you'll be able to conquer and destroy Voldemort! The Aurors can keep the situation as in control as possible now but Harry, Dumbledore knows how risky this is. But he knows in the end, it's going to be you, but he wants you to be ___ready_!" said Hermione, as though there was nothing more important than Harry understanding this.

Harry didn't respond. "I'll wait - Until the end of this year, but that's it. I'm going to fight after that, ___no matter what_."

Draco took in all the information that Harry had received. And then Harry got to what he said would be a difficult part - His father had killed Draco's uncle. Harry was shocked at Draco's indifference.

"They're not my family, Harry," said Draco.

Harry shrugged. "Well...I'm glad you're not upset."

* * *

Later, the two of them, Harry and Draco — the two oh-so angst-filled boys on the radio indeed — sat by the lake. Draco was rolling a joint. It was eleven, and they had only just met for Valentines' Day. Harry had decided he was all right with smoking pot as long as it was done in moderation. He didn't fancy his boyfriend being a pothead. Neither of them had smoked since Christmas.

"Maybe we shouldn't get high," said Draco suddenly.

Harry's eyes widened. "Draco Malfoy? Not wanting to get high? Wow ..."

"I'd like to enjoy this moment," said Draco. Draco put his arm around Harry and they both lied onto the grass. "This is a war. We've escaped death quite well, Harry, but we have to appreciate these moments."

"Yeah, I know," said Harry. "It's just so easy for me to live in the moment."

"I worry," said Draco. "Quite a bit. Everything could just end in a moment."

Harry grabbed Draco's hand and squeezed it. "I love you."

"I know you do."

It was a long time before the two of them left.

_And I wait staring at the northern star  
I'm afraid it won't lead me anywhere  
He's so cold he will ruin the world tonight_

_And I wait staring at the northern star  
I'm afraid it won't lead me anywhere_

* * *

**_Author's Endnote:_ **Lyrics come from "Northern Star" by Hole, as always written by Courtney Love respectively. Stay tuned to see how this unforgettable story folds...


	22. Chapter 22

**Author's Note**: Enjoy! Quote instead of a lyric this time as preface, interestingly enough...

* * *

Chapter Twenty-Two

'_I'm a survivor, or at least that's what everyone tells me_' - Courtney Love

An adolescent lie on the grass by the lake by a beautiful castle, pondering something as his fellow peers laughed and screamed as the school year ended. The summer sky warmed them all, and the change of season brought them hope. Though the climate was peaceful here, the boy knew that the outside world was filled with terror from Lord Voldemort. And the boy feared the destiny that awaited him more than anything.  
Draco Malfoy waited for Ginny to come comfort him. Finally moving, he looked behind him to see Ginny coming, without a smile, and lie next to him.  
'How can they be like this?' said Ginny, disgusted. 'They don't understand there is a war out there'  
'They're naive," said Draco, looking at her properly. "They don't understand, but shouldn't they? Ginny, the siege nearly destroyed all of them, sent them straight to a hell somewhere'  
'Yes,' said Ginny, nodding. She looked directly at Draco. "I want to fight with you and Harry'  
Draco looked at her, startled. He pondered it for a moment. "If that is your wish, I won't stop you." He returned to his relaxed state.  
'Harry wouldn't let me,' said Ginny, sounding frustrated.  
'It isn't Harry's choice to make, Ginny,' said Draco, sounding intellectual. 'There's battle out there for the greater good...'

* * *

Number 4, Privet Drive looked absolutely normal from the outside - The lawn was perfectly cut, the cars shiny as new - But inside, a raging war failed to discontinue.  
"How can you bring another one of these hoodlums into my home?" bellowed Vernon at Harry, who stood next to Draco.  
Dudley was sitting on the couch, while Petunia sat, strangely quiet, biting her fingernails.  
"I'm telling you! It's Dumbledore's orders! You don't understand! It's real out there!" screamed Harry back, angrily.  
"I DON'T CARE WHAT'S GOING ON OUT THERE - " began Vernon, but was abruptly stopped.  
"Vernon, please, calm yourself," said Petunia in a small voice, and then Harry could hear a whimper, and Petunia was running out of the room, crying. Vernon and Dudley followed her, both giving Harry and Draco nasty looks.  
"What the fuck is wrong with that Muggle idiot?" asked Draco, with not a hint of remorse.  
Harry shook his head, confused. "I don't know. Let's go upstairs..."

* * *

_Dear Petunia,  
The most gravest of times have reached us in the wizarding world. Lord Voldemort has returned, and you as much as I understand the severity of this. Please, I ask you more in this circumstance. The whole world is in Harry's hand - And in Draco Malfoy's. Please, secure them in your home. It is the one place you will always be protected._

_Albus Dumbledore_

Petunia cried as she read the letter for the umpteenth time in her bedroom as Vernon was out at work, Dudley out with his friends, and Harry and Draco downstairs in the kitchen. Petunia was confused on her standings - For so many years she had ignored the wizarding world, trying so hard to shut it out. Her family had always adored her sister, Lily, and she had always been in the shadow of her sister. Her sadness had turned to hate. But now, she understood more than ever the weight that lay on her nephew's shoulder. How could her hate go on when Harry was likely to end up dead? The events that killed her sister would repeat themselves .  
It was true - Petunia regretted how she had mistreated Harry and his mother.

* * *

Draco held Harry's hand as they lie down on Harry's small bed in his very small bedroom. Harry was disgruntled by being trapped in the house. Harry wanted to be out there, fighting harder than ever, and if he died, he wanted to bring down as many Death Eaters as possible.  
'Dumbledore wants to keep you safe as long as possible,' Draco told Harry. 'There's nothing we can do about it'  
'I know, I know,' said Harry, hating that Draco was repeating what he already knew. 'I just feel so useless here'  
'Well, I'm here, too,' said Draco, as though it was a necessary reminder.  
Perhaps it was. Draco looked at the clock. 'Ten minutes until you're sixteen, Harry'  
'I believe you're right,' said Harry, and now he was smiling. 'Will we get to have passionate sex like we did on your birthday'  
"I don't think I fancy passionate,' said Draco, contemplating. 'How about rough'  
'I think that sounds right,' said Harry, and he kissed Draco so fiercely, as though trying to drive the negative emotions out of him.  
Harry almost ripped the t-shirt off Draco, rubbing his chest all over as Draco felt him up. Harry slipped his hand into Draco's pants and heard Draco moan happily - And then Draco was rubbing Harry's back and he was in ecstasy. Draco took off Harry's shirt carefully as he rubbed Harry's back and chest, caressing him gently taking in Harry's scent as Harry closed his eyes in pleasure. Draco put his arms around Harry as Harry did something that made Draco very happy with his hand .

The sky was a beautiful blue and the sun shined beautifully on a young woman who stood apprehensively by the small round cave, surrounded by beautiful grass - So out of place.  
Ginny sighed as she entered, shaking. The cave was dark yet she did not feel frightened. There was a strange sort of comfort to it, a familiarity she rarely sensed anymore. She lit her wand after a moment, and quickly walked, almost running, to the center of the cave where above her was an arch, which led into a square, stone room, with a small table in the center. Inscriptions were written on the walls all with the same message: The Protection of Body, The Protection of Mind, The Protection of Soul.  
Ginny took a deep breath remembering the book: Only in the most desperate circumstance could a true Gryffindor unleash the protection.

* * *

It was midnight and in a dark alley between two office buildings three figures in hooded cloaks stood together.  
At once, the three of them took off their hoods and began speaking in desperate conversation.  
"Ginny, how did you get here?" Harry asked.  
"I flew," Ginny said hastily. "But that's not why I'm here'  
Draco and Harry peered at her awkwardly, yet concerned.  
'I unleashed the protection of Godric Gryffindor'  
Draco gasped loudly. Harry looked at them confused. 'What is that'  
'Before Godric Gryffindor passed, he put down his greatest powers of protection in a cave near the mountains. No one in history has ever been able to unleash the protection- Only a true Gryffindor could, and it would have to be the most desperate of situations,' Draco explained to Harry , smiling at Ginny, impressed.  
Ginny took out three gold necklaces from her cloak. "Each one represents a different protection - This one is for you Harry, The Protection of Body- Draco, The Protection of Mind - And for myself, The Protection of Soul.'  
'Why are you giving me the body one?' asked Harry, sounding indignant. 'You can use that to protect yourself, Ginny'  
'Harry, it isn't me or Draco who in the end will defeat Voldemort - You know it will be you. You need the protection. The mind protection will offer aid if being tortured with Dark Magic, and the soul protection will make me immune to Dementors.'  
'Why are you giving me the Mind Protection?' asked Draco.  
'Because you're the most susceptible to Dark Magic,' said Ginny. 'Given your upbringing'  
Draco nodded. 'The Death Eaters will try to bring me in'  
'I guess I really can't stop you, Ginny,' said Harry. 'But I don't want you to come, you'll put yourself in danger'  
'I already am - We all are,' said Ginny. 'I'm not giving you a choice, Harry.'

'Ginny, it's okay,' Tom soothed her. His such perfect beauty that reminded her of Harry, who didn't even notice her. Tom, who had listened to her. Tom, with his beautiful eyes .  
'You'll always be here, right, Tom?' asked Ginny.  
'Of course, Ginny ... '  
And Tom's arms grabbed Ginny's neck, and she was screaming .  
Ginny awoke from her horrible dream, startled. She couldn't cry, not again, not ever. She wouldn't need to soon. She would make Tom regret what he had done ...

She would have her revenge.

* * *

_September 1_. 'Won't they suspect if we don't return?' said Draco irritably. The two were lying in Harry's bed at the Dursleys' early in the morning, planning their getaway.  
'It doesn't matter! This is more important!' said Harry, annoyed by Draco's unnecessary objections.  
Draco glared at him. 'Forgive me for caring,Harry - I'll try not do that anymore,' said Draco, and he looked away from him.  
Harry didn't respond. After a moment he got out of bed and began packing things into a duffel bag - Just necessities, as he didn't know how long or where the journey would take them. All he knew was he'd avenge everyone Voldemort had ever hurt and vanquish him forever .  
'Draco. Please. We have to meet Ginny,' Harry said, in an empty tone unlike Harry.  
Draco sighed and began getting his bag together as well in silence. Draco pondered all of it. How long would it take? Would they be able to face the Dark Lord? Would they survive? Could he live if Harry died to save him? Or Ginny? Was it all worth it?  
Of course it was. It was for the greater good, the protection of all. They couldn't keep living in danger every moment of their lives. Enough people had died, enough evil had been spread. Draco had lost too much already. It all had to end.  
And Draco would face it until it did.

* * *

The dungeons of the Malfoy Manor were made of rotting stone and had a sickening ancient feel to it. It felt as though the torture of the muggles that had happened years ago could still be heard through the walls. Only very dim torches lit the dungeon and were less than sufficient. Most of the dungeon was full of old, small cells used for prisoners, but in the center was an oval meeting room, lit with several more bright, burning torches for the Malfoys to discuss the prisoners years ago - And now the Dark Lord and his followers assembled there.  
In the center stood the Dark Lord himself: the red eyes, the snake-like features, the menacing visage. He alone drew down the hood of his dark cloak and smiled an evil smile at his followers who surrounded the meeting room against the walls, all hooded, awaiting their master.  
''My humble servants, bow upon your Lord,' said the Dark Lord, in a quiet, yet sickening voice full of venom and terror.  
The ten present Death Eaters bowed before their master, several letting out praises to him. Voldemort motioned for them to stop and continued. 'Nott! Bring the Muggle in"  
From a dark passageway to the right of the meeting room came marching steps and someone crying, and then a smack and a scream. A woman in her thirties was being pulled forward by Nott. The woman could not stop crying and shaking as though she was a sick child. Voldemort curled an evil smile at her and pointed his wand at her.  
'Crucio!' he screamed in the most sinister voice. The woman screamed a thousand times louder than she had before; every bone in her body was shaking and looked as though they would all pop; her entire body went so pale she looked beyond death; her eyes were impassive.  
And it stopped. 'Please ... Stop ... What do you want from me?' whispered the shaken voice of the woman through tears; her voice was near inaudible. 'Do not question me, muggle!' screamed Voldemort. And then he laughed and his voice softened. 'Do not worry ... You shall be dead soon enough'  
The woman screamed in terror and uncontrollable tears poured down her cheeks as Voldemort and his followers laughed in mirth.  
'Please ... have mercy ... ' said the woman.  
Voldemort laughed harder. 'You remind me of your dear friend, woman,' he said, and smiled at her in fake soothing. 'Do you remember her? The fool who dared betrayed me? You shall end up just like the stupid girl ... Just like Lily!'

* * *

**HARRY POTTER AND DRACO MALFOY MISSING AGAIN WITH NEW COMPANION**

September 15, 1996

_Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy, the current heroes of the wizarding world, have once again disappeared - And now with the daughter of Arthur Weasley, Ginevra Weasley, 15. Though the disappearance are disturbing, many are absolutely assured the three have sought out to destroy He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named once and for all. 'Harry was done standing by,' says Dean Thomas, a fellow student. 'He's going to face You-Know-Who once and for all.' Whether the rumor is true or not will be seen in the near future._

* * *

'Still no news on any deaths,' said Ginny.  
'We don't even know where to start,' said Harry's hopeless voice with his head in his hands.  
Harry, Draco, and Ginny sat in a small, discreet muggle hotel in London, awaiting clues. So far, little was known.  
'We need a source ... Someone in correspondence with Dumbledore .. But nothing conspicuous ...' said Draco.  
They all pondered for a moment. Finally, Harry spoke, 'Jill'  
'You think she'd know anything?' asked Ginny.  
'Yes. She was with me when Dumbledore told me everything ... Her and Sirius ... Dumbledore would let her know what's going on ... We can also have Jill send an owl to Dumbledore to let him know what we're doing ... And to Ron and Hermione ...' At the mention of his two best friends, his voice cracked slightly - Guilt had spread through him for once again leaving them behind. But the truth was, he couldn't bare bringing anyone else along and putting anyone else in danger.  
'Let's go, then,' said Ginny suddenly. 'We'll fly to Godric's Hollow'  
'Are you mad? In daylight? We'll be seen!' exclaimed Draco, looking at her in a patronizing way.  
'So? That's what we're trying to do isn't it? We'll take them down,' Ginny snapped.  
Harry nodded. 'She's right, We're going'  
Draco nodded at them in obvious defeat.

* * *

Hermione and Ron sat in the common room in their usual armchairs by the warm fire, except one of the armchairs was empty - The one without Harry. The two found themselves in a similar predicament they had been in before - Harry had gone missing without notice. This time, however, both Hermione and Ron knew he had not been kidnapped. Harry and Draco had fled from the Dursleys as they could not have been kidnapped there because of the ultimate protection. Further evidence was that Ginny had joined them, which was not surprising at all.  
'I'm sure Harry will contact us as as possible, but remember, Ron, he's probably frightened of interference and him being tracked!' said Hermione indignantly to Ron's anger.  
'He should have brought us,' said Ron in a small voice, looking directly at the fire.  
'He still feels incredibly guilty about ... about before,' said Hermione bowing her head, looking at the ground. 'He's too scared for us'  
There was a silence of acceptance from both Ron and Hermione. Then a booming voice as though an intercom through the school .  
'Hermione Granger and Ronald Weasley, please report directly to the Headmaster's Office, please.' It was the voice of Professor McGonagall.  
Hermione looked at Ron , a million horrible thoughts racing through her, knowing he was thinking the same. Had something horrible happened to Harry? Was someone dead? What had happened that Dumbledore would have called them?

* * *

Harry, Draco, and Ginny walked to Jill's door upon landing in Godric's Hollowafter hiding their brooms. Harry gently knocked on her door. They waited for a few minutes with no answer. Harry tried the doorknob but it wouldn't budge. He looked at Draco, who looked unsure. Ginny looked as though she wanted Harry to continue.  
Looking around to make sure no Muggles were around, Harry took out his wand. 'Alohomora!' And the door flew open and Harry hurried in, Draco and Ginny behind him.  
Ten wands pointed at him at once. Harry was startled for a moment, but then realized he wasn't going to be attacked. It was Ministry Officials, including Professor Moody.  
'Potter!' growled Moody. 'You gave us a nasty shock there'  
Harry tried to smile but he couldn't because it had just sunk in that something horrible must have happened there for there to Ministry Officials there .  
'What's happened?' Harry asked in an urgent tone.  
Moody's eyes widened as though he was shocked Harry didn't know. 'Come here, Potter. The rest of you, continue searching'  
Harry, Draco, and Ginny followed Moody into one of the spare rooms.

* * *

Ron and Hermione sat down in front of Dumbledore who was surveying them carefully before speaking. Ron and Hermione took a moment to appreciate the eccentricities of Dumbledore's office. They hadn't had the pleasure of being in it nearly as much as Harry had.  
'Thank you for coming, Mr. Weasley and Ms. Granger,' he spoke calmly, though he did not seem too amiable. 'I have a task to attend to shortly, and I feel I must confide in you'  
Ron and Hermione looked at Dumbledore carefully.  
'Jill, Harry's godmother as you know, has been kidnaped by Voldemort. He is going to lure Harry to him using Jill. Voldemort knows very well that Harry would never allow a friend to be taken at the stake of Harry, and therefore, Harry shall try to rescue her. However, I shall not let this happen'  
Ron's eyes widened as he raised his eyebrows and Hermione stared at Dumbledore with confused eyes.  
'I shall infiltrate the Malfoy Manor and rescue Jill,' Dumbledore said carefully. 'And Harry shall lure Voldemort to him'  
Every time Dumbledore said Voldemort's name Ron shuddered, though Hermione only seemed more alarmed.  
'How do you know she is at the Manor, sir?' asked Hermione.  
'I have recently received an owl from Professor Moody. Jill's home was being searched today by Aurors who asked Professor Moody to come along, and Harry, Mr. Malfoy, and young Ms. Weasley arrived shortly after,' explained Professor Dumbledore, twinkling at Ron's relieved look. 'Voldemort left a note in her home - And not only that, but he murdered Jill's grandparents'  
There was an awful silence and the mood turned very somber.  
'In their memory, I ask you to come with me.'

* * *

'You didn't think Dumbledore was going to abandon you, did you, boy?' growled Moody at Harry, and then came a barely audible laugh.  
Upon finding out of the kidnapping of Jill, Harry had immediately stated he was going to save her, but Moody wouldn't let him leave. Not until he contacted Dumbledore ... And Dumbledore had seemingly made it a personal responsibility to save Jill ... And Hermione and Ron were joining him. Harry, of course, felt compelled to save Jill ... But he knew the situation was in good hands. Unsure of what to do next, Harry, Draco, and Ginny returned to the Muggle hotel, unable to stay in Jill's house any longer, it sickening Harry and Draco. Harry was frightened horrible for Jill. Every time he imagined Jill he imagined her screaming, yelling for help ... He remembered vividly how the Cruciatus Curse had felt and he could almost hear her scream in his head ... And the guilt poured in .  
'We just have to wait, Harry,' said Ginny in am empty voice. She sat on the bed with Draco, watching Harry pace. 'We have to listen to Dumbledore if we even want a chance'  
'I know, I know,' Harry said, his voice full of immense frustration. Harry could not sleep that night.

* * *

**DUMBLEDORE INFILTRATES MALFOY MANOR FOR MUGGLE HOSTAGE; NARCISSA MALFOY ARRESTED FOR HOUSING HE-WHO-MUST-NOT-BE-NAMED IN HERHOME; FIVE DEATH EATER CASUALITES; NO SIGN OF HE-WHO-MUST NOT BE NAMED**  
September 17, 1996

_A trusted Muggle in the wizarding community, a good friend of Dumbledore and godmother to Harry Potter, was taken hostage by Death Eaters in her home, leaving her grandparents dead. Only a note remained in her home, attempting to lure Harry Potter to the Malfoy Manor. Albus Dumbledore himself infiltrated the Manor with two of Harry's best friends at Hogwarts, Ronald Weasley and Hermione Granger, who insist they gave Dumbledore no choice. All three of them have returned unscathed and have captured several Death Eaters, including Narcissa Malfoy - Who seemingly took it upon herself to do the bidding of Voldemort not only for herself, but for her late husband.  
However, Dumbledore, sadly, was to late to save the Muggle who, as reported by Dumbledore, was found in the dungeons of the Malfoy home 'murdered by the killing curse, lying dead on the ground as though asleep'. Five Death Eaters have been killed in the incident: Goyle, Crabbe, Peterson, Roberts, and Perks. An investigation of the Malfoy Manor is underway._

* * *

The news had come as a horrible shock to Harry, Draco, and Ginny, though it had not been the first strike of bad news. Bellatrix Lestrange, Augustus Rookwood, and Antonin Dolohov had broken out from Azkaban the night before, most certainly due to Voldemort, as it was due to him to begin with that the Dementors had began fleeing Azkaban just months ago .  
And Draco remembered the bliss of being free with Harry ... Not a care in the world ... Enjoying themselves as normal teenagers would ... And Draco thought of how foolish they had been. Voldemort had returned and it was worse than ever; his most loyal servants had escaped Azkaban and people were dying ... more and more people ... And worst of all, Jill .  
Draco fell off the bed, a horrible surge in his stomach ... And then he realized he was barely breathing ... He couldn't even cry, the pain was too much ... He felt as though he would shatter ... And he looked at Harry and Ginny .  
Ginny who hadn't a chance to properly get to know Jill, sat confused and pale. Harry looked impassive at first, and then he had walked to the bathroom and closed the door behind him, and with a click it locked. He knew Harry would not come out for some time. Jill ... who had done so much for them ... Jill, who had offered most needed information ... Jill ... who had done nothing wrong.  
Ginny got off the bed and sat down next to Draco, who lie between the two beds, his head nearly hitting the nightstand behind him. Ginny looked at him with the most remorse any human being could ever give a friend as she gently patted his hair ... But it was not enough. No ... Voldemort would pay.  
His mother in Azkaban had not bothered Draco in the slightest ... She deserved it. Draco only hoped the Vow of Luck would assist them destroy her master before he could unleash her, too, from Azkaban.  
Ginny assisted him to sit up and she managed to sit next to him, both of them leaning their backs against the nightstand. She put her arm around his shoulder, and Draco leaned his head onto Ginny's.  
'Why?' Draco finally said. 'Why wasn't Voldemort there'  
It was impossible question for Ginny to answer, but Draco wanted to know. Surely Voldemort expected Harry to come ... He had planned to fool Harry and show Harry Jill's dead body and then kill Harry ... He must have fled upon seeing Dumbledore ... The only one he had ever feared.  
Draco sighed.

* * *

The Dark Lord sat on his throne on the dais, and looked below at his kneeling Death Eaters. The room was large and square, made of ancient stone. Unlike the dungeons of Malfoy Manor, the new base was high on a hill in a castle, and the very room they resided in was on the highest floor, and through the large window on the opposite side of the Dark Lord he watched as he awaited his enemies, intent on destroying them.

Soon ... in time. 'Parkinson,' said the Dark Lord softly.  
A Death Eater rose. 'Yes, my Lord?" Parkinson said in a fearful tone.  
'Is it true Goyle is dead?' asked the Dark Lord in an impassive tone.  
'Yes, my Lord - At Dumbledore's hands. As well as the others at guard - I Disapparated after he finished the others off; I stood no chance my lord ... ' pleaded Parkinson.  
'Very well,' said the Dark Lord. 'A small loss. And Narcissa"  
'Azkaban, my lord,' said Parkinson.  
'Ah. Severus!' said the Dark Lord, and Parkinson returned to kneeling with the other Death Eaters with a small bow.  
Severus Snape rose. 'Yes, my lord?' he asked.  
'You will free Narcissa - When I kill Harry Potter, she shall kill her pitiful son.'

* * *

**Author's Endnote**: Remember the Vow of Luck! Jill dying was a loss of protection and a reminder that Voldemort can overcome even the most beloved characters. In the next chapter, there will be another death. There will be one or two more chapters after that.


	23. Chapter 23

Chapter Twenty-Three

_I wait alone  
For what will never come;  
And I'll throw it all away…_

Narcissa grabbed Snape's hand as she shook in panic. 'Please help me, Severus,' begged Narcissa, tears streaming down her cheek.

The two stood at the heart of a deep forest much past midnight; the cry of the unknown animals was far from Narcissa's worries.

The chill of wind forced Snape to tighten his cloak and throw his hood over his head. When he spoke, it was in a suspicious and curious voice. 'Surely you do not pity Draco?'

'He is vermin and a disgrace!' said Narcissa, quite indignantly. 'But the Malfoy honor and protection spells ... I was forced to perform the Vow of Luck ...'

Narcissa looked away as Snape made a slight sigh, in obvious horror and shock. He seemed to be deep in thought. When he finally spoke, it was in a deep, hollow voice. 'What do you want of me, Narcissa?'

'Protect me Severus,' said Narcissa, now putting her arms around his shoulder, leaning her head against his neck.

* * *

In a well-lit cabin hidden by enchantment, Harry Potter, Ginny Weasley, and Draco Malfoy bid their time exchanging strategies between each other.

'If nothing else at least there's no betrayal to worry about!' mentioned Ginny oddly, a faked sense of cheeriness badly aggravating her tone. 'Aren't we lucky to have Dumbledore being Secret-Keeper this time.' It wasn't a question really.

Harry was horrified at first at the idea of the Fidelius Charm ... The use of a Secret-Keeper... He remembered the betrayal of his parents too well... But as Dumbledore himself had chosen to become the Secret-Keeper, all would be well.

But Dumbledore was somehow certain Harry was to bide his time. He would know when it was truly the time to reach the final destination, there would be no doubt, he had said. Harry feared these days could be his last days of serenity, and yet...

It felt unwanted. The desire to fight overcame all his other emotions. It was in his blood ... The righteous anger that flowed in his veins... To at all costs, achieve justice for his parents and for all...

'In very short time,' Draco would always say as Harry shook with anger and Draco could never honestly calm him.

But that day, there was a knock on the door that startled them. Certain of no betrayal, Harry answered the door while Ginny and Draco sat on the small sofa furniture, warming themselves with fire. Remus Lupin entered.

'Professor Lupin!' said Harry, happy to see him. 'Any news? How are you?'

'Good, Harry, thank you,' he said, though his tone was grave. 'There is a letter for you from ... Well, you'll see,' said Remus, his tone darker than ever now, and his voice was empty as he handed Harry a rolled parchment.

'Have you read it?" asked Harry, as he allowed Remus to come in, and they joined a very alert Draco and Ginny on the couch.

'The letter is enchanted so only you can read it,' said Remus. 'But Dumbledore is quite certain ...'

Harry did not hesitate as he opened the parchment. It was short, but Harry did not need read it. The horrible voice of the Dark Lord himself that Harry remembered too well screamed out at them:

**'HARRY POTTER, THIS IS YOUR LAST CHANCE. IF YOU WANT TO AVENGE THOSE YOU FEEL I HAVE WRONGED, COME SEE ME HARRY. FACE ME, MAN TO MAN ... AND I SHALL SHOW YOU TO NOT TRY TO DEFY THE DARK LORD ... AND YOU WILL HAVE THE FATE OF YOUR PARENTS, HARRY ... AND YET ... A CHANCE YOU WILL STILL TAKE ... I AWAIT YOU AT DUNE CASTLE.'**

Ginny screamed as it ended; Draco was shaking and Remus looked horrified.

'Harry –' began Remus, though Harry cut off any kind of somehow consoling words he might have had. 'No, professor, I'm going.'

* * *

Dune Castle rested on a mountainside in the heart of a deep forest on a hill. Hidden by all Muggles, many said it was the home of Salazar Slytherin himself. Dune Castle was made of quite old stone, and though it no longer had the glow of something beautiful, it was the pure ancient traces of magic that drew the Dark Lord himself here.

The Dark Lord sat on his throne in the dais in the same stone, square room, on the highest floor where a large window stood on his left, where he would look out to see all those who dare approached Dune Castle. On the right was an ancient wall of stone with inscriptions of snakes and in the center was an opening for an entrance. This time, the Dark Lord sat alone, awaiting Harry Potter so he could finally give the boy the obliteration he deserved...

But then, two Death Eaters came rushing in, and the crashing of manacles and screaming could be heard as they dragged two prisoners. The Death Eaters were Bellatrix and Mulciber, holding two of his most trusted followers ... Severus Snape and Narcissa Malfoy. Narcissa screamed in terror, and The Dark Lord had never seen someone so silent and horrified as Snape.

'What is this?' asked the Dark Lord angrily.

'Snape released Narcissa, as trusted,' began Mulciber, but then Narcissa screamed. '_SILENCIO_! I had put a tracking spell on Severus, my Lord, I knew how he felt of her ... I feared she would not want to complete the task and he would assist her... And I was correct. I managed to capture them with the assistance of Bellatrix.'

The Dark Lord bellowed an awful laugh but he was angrier than ever. 'Dare you betray, Severus? And you, Narcissa? You cowards!'

Narcissa seemed to be mouthing a plea, but of course she could not be heard. And yet they both seemed to be blocking out interference in their minds ... He could not delve into their thoughts ...

The Dark Lord pointed his wand directly at the two traitors, and in the most sinister, yet quite voice, with indescribable anger, he said, '_CRUCIO_!'

They shook and screamed in pain so much it was as though they would almost break through the manacles. The minute Snape began screaming the Dark Lord used the same silence spell Mulciber used on Narcissa and the look of terror on his faced worsened ….. His and Narcissa's cry of pain could not even be heard ….

* * *

'Remember the plan, Harry,' said Draco. 'Don't end up making a fool out of yourself, this is our _only chance_.'

'I know that, Draco!' said Harry, annoyed.

'He's just worried, Harry!' alerted Ginny.

The three stood in the forest near the castle, far out enough to not been seen, but to still see the castle beyond the trees and ferns. The plan was this: Infiltrate the castle as much as possible, use the Invisibility Cloak, and backup would come soon after …

_But they must not been seen_, which was the obvious weakness for Harry. But Harry wouldn't betray Dumbledore's orders, no. 'How bad is your scar, Harry?' asked Draco.

'Bad.' Harry said, as though annoyed by the question because he didn't want to say how much it really hurt … It was like a headache but a hundred times worse … And he could feel Voldemort's anger … .He was livid about something ….

'I think we should do it now,' said Ginny. 'Under the cloak, I mean.'

'Hopefully this will work,' Draco said. 'You haven't any idea the powers of the Dark Lord …. He must expect this …. But I see, what choice do we have?'

'Thanks for the hope, Draco,' Harry said.

'It is the truth,' Draco said. 'But Harry …'

His voice had softened.

'Yes?' Harry asked in a quiet voice.

'I love you,' said Draco and he kissed Harry.

* * *

The castle doors just barely opened and Parkinson noticed … Harry Potter was here, under that cloak of his Snape had told them of ….

'Reveal yourself!' screamed Parkinson. 'You shall die, Potter!'

The entrance room was quite large and like the above throne room for the Dark Lord it was lit by torches and made of old stone. In the middle was an opening in the stone and there as a dusty, cracked, marble staircase that led to the upper stories.

Parkinson muttered the warning incantation as he listened to the footsteps, aiming his wand….

But then he heard someone cry a stunning spell and he was unconscious.

* * *

'Too late,' whispered Ginny in a shaken voice, as the three of them tried to stay still under the cloak.

Who knew.

Ten Death Eaters were pouring down the staircase and into the entrance room, screaming stunning spells everywhere and blocking the staircase. The spells hadn't come near them yet as they slowly maneuvered around in fear. There were too many of them … But reinforcements would come soon ….

In the far corner by a small window, emitting light, it seemed as though the Death Eaters spell did not hit, luckily. They became angry and scared they had defied their master. And BANG! The castle doors flew open, revealing perhaps twenty Aurors and some familiar faces, willing to fight … Ginny saw Sirius, Remus, Professor McGonagall …. Hagrid …. And so many others, too…

Harry worked on instinct and they moved slowly against the wall to the stairs that were no longer guarded as the duels broke out. The three slowly moved up the stairs. The first floor looked like simply ancient dormitories on either side …. The next seemed to be an elegant, timeless library …. The next was some sort of awful sitting room full of antiques of Dark Magic …

'He's on the very top … I can feel it …. He knows I'm coming,' said Harry. 'Maybe you should stay behind.'

'NO!' said Ginny and Draco together.

Harry sighed as they reached the next staircase. It looked like prison cells on either side and there were screams …. Inside the cells were people, families, children …. Missing Muggle-borns seen in the _Daily Prophet_ …. And all around the cells were …

_Dementors_. Harry was shaking horribly and so was Draco … They had to pull of the cloak. Harry was suffocating … A million horrible images poured through his head … He tried his aim his wand but they were so plentiful and more powerful then before.

'GO!' He finally heard Ginny's voice. 'I'll free these people and meet you back up, I'm immune, I have the Protection of Soul!'

Harry nodded, grabbing the cloak and throwing it on Draco and himself, trying to block out the chills, continued to run up the staircases.

Now there were no more staircases to go up to. There was just a small hallway of ancient stone and a dimly lit torch on either side …. And Harry knew they were there as they slowly crept into the large, rectangular stone room where Voldemort sat on his throne on a dais peering at two prisoners on the floor in manacles and with two Death Eaters on either side of him …

The pain too much, Harry screamed out loud.

* * *

Ginny freed the prisoners easily using the Patronus Charm, as she wasn't susceptible to their horrors. She told them to wait there for the battle to end … They had hope but they look horrified and shaken … _They had been tortured_.

She had to go join Harry. 'Be safe,' she said to the prisoners, and she raced up the stairs and into the stone hallway. Immediately she saw in the large room in front of her was Draco sitting on a wooden stool. His arms were chained around him to the chair and she could hear Voldemort performing the Cruciatus Curse … And then Draco would shake horribly …. But there was no trace of pain … _The Protection of Mind_.

'WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH YOU BOY?" screamed Voldemort. 'Do you mean to mock me?'

Ginny couldn't be seen. The Invisibility Cloak was at the end of the short hallway. Voldemort was not in view from the hallway, only Draco …. She quickly crept forward and grabbed the cloak and threw it on herself.

* * *

Harry was imprisoned to the wall by a live snake tightened around him. It was not long, but thick, and its horrible tongue reached out inches from Harry's face. Harry knew it would not harm him, Voldemort would duel him in the end.

Snape and Draco's mother were in manacles on the floor a few feet from the dais. What Voldemort didn't realize as he tortured Draco was that Draco wasn't feeling it. The Protection of Gryffindor was amazing. And behind Voldemort was Narcissa, shaking and in pain each time the curse was placed on Draco. And not only this, but, she most certainly could feel it. But some silence charm had been place on both Narcissa and Snape …

_There must be some protection spell or bond between Draco and his mother_, Harry thought. But Harry couldn't remember Draco ever telling him. It seemed to be working to their advantage, regardless.

And then –

The snake screamed and it was pulled off of him dramatically, and now dead on the ground. And then Ginny revealed herself, then shooting a stunning spell at Mulciber who had raced down the dais immediately. Mulciber fell to the ground.

Voldemort now aimed his wand at Ginny. It was now that Harry realized Voldemort had found a new wand for their battle … No time! Voldemort was at the beginning of the Killing Curse … He threw himself towards Ginny, pushing her out of the way just in time and barely saving himself in the process …

And rolling over he realized this was where he had dropped his wand … His grabbed it quickly and was up in an instant. The seconds felt like hours as he heard Bellatrix and Ginny dueling … And then Voldemort coming to face him.

'Dare you battle the greatest wizard to ever live, Harry?' said Voldemort in a mocking horrible voice.

'The greatest wizard to live is Albus Dumbledore,' said Harry, now feeling brave. It would all be over, regardless, either way …. But he had to win. But what spell? Voldemort would be prepared for anything. And then in seconds he could die. And then, a spell Hermione had told him months ago came to him right as Voldemort was going to kill him.

'_Avada—_!' began Voldemort irefully.

'_Gustasio_!' A horrible wind had erupted in the room. The throne on the dais was shaking, the large window flew open letting in a horrible wind, Bellatrix flew to one wall and Ginny to the other, and most of all, Voldemort's wand was shaking in his hand as he finished the spell …. Not only did he miss by inches but Harry felt his feet lift from the floor and his head nearly collided with the ceiling.

_The Protection of Body_. Still clutching his wand as hard as he could, he knew he no longer needed it much longer. Voldemort's wand had flown out of his hand … So luckily ….

And the hate in Harry surfaced too easily. '_AVADA KEDAVRA_!'

Tom Marvolo Riddle, who had turned into the monster that was Lord Voldemort flew out the window with such force that when the gust stopped Harry heard Voldemort crash to the outside stone pathway leading to the castle, surrounded by grass.

Ginny got to her feet and said a simple spell and Draco was released from the manacles. But Bellatrix had retrieved her wand now and before Harry could move –

'_SALE SALASTE_!' screamed Bellatrix. 'You will suffer before I kill you!'

Harry's body seemed to explode with blood all over him as he collapsed. Was he dead? No, he couldn't be!

But Ginny almost collapsed as she heard the horrible anger in Draco. Draco had thrown himself at Bellatrix, stealing her wand, suffocating her … She hadn't expected this, not prepared. Bellatrix was trying to scream but Draco was going to kill her …. And then using Bellatrix's own wand he used the exact spell she had used on Harry.

And it looked as though Draco was bleeding horribly too, the blood splattered all over. And clutching her neck harder then ever, letting her feel as much pain as possible, he murdered Bellatrix Lestrange .

Draco, covered in Bellatrix's blood, was crying. Ginny was holding an unconscious Harry up, crying horribly on him, tears flooding down her cheeks. She was muttering something and she looked paler and paler, breathing deeper and deeper …

'Sympathetic magic,' said Draco, through terrible tears as he kneeled down with Ginny. 'Ginny, don't kill yourself for Harry … He's …. He's …'

He couldn't bring himself to do it. Voldemort was gone but Draco's world was over ….

Ginny looked at Draco. 'I'm in love with Harry, Draco.'

Some of the horrible wounds all over Harry's body began to heal … But it looked as though Ginny could take it no longer as she collapsed.

* * *

'_Yes, it is true. The Dark Lord has been conquered thanks to the efforts of countless Aurors who infiltrated Dune Castle … But most of all, due to Harry Potter, The-Boy-Who-Lived, Draco Malfoy, and Ginny Weasley. The body of Voldemort has been burned into ashes by the Ministry … Hostages held at the castle have been released … Draco Malfoy has survived with minor injuries while Ginny Weasley lies in a state of coma, but mediwizards at St. Mungo's have alerted us she shall wake soon … However, and most of all, Harry Potter remains in absolute critical conditions … Loved ones sit by his bed, awaiting what may come … _'

The radio sounded so distant to Ron and Hermione, who were rushing to head back to the hospital to see Harry once again. Three days had past … At one point Harry had recovered more … But now …. There was some sort of sickly poison, eating at his insides …Anything could happen.

'Oh _Ron_,' said Hermione, crying. 'Professor Moody died and so many others and it was awful and Harry …. No it can't happen, please, _no.'_

_'_Hermione … he'll make it … I … I …' Ron's voice cracked worse than ever as he cried for his best friend. Hermione embraced him.

'Harry's goal for his life was to defeat Voldemort,' said Hermione softly. 'He achieved it.'

* * *

Draco held Harry's hand in the chair by Harry's bed, alone with him for just a moment. That's all he had asked for because now he knew. They could only wait according to the mediwizards … There was nothing more they could do … Harry's body would take it or Harry wouldn't …. Wouldn't …

'My love, please awake,' begged Draco quietly, then leaning over and kissing him on the lips gently. '_Please_.'

Ron and Hermione joined him, moving the curtains away momentarily from the hall and closing them immediately. They were holding each other tight with tears all over their faces. Draco couldn't stop shaking … Harry had changed his life. How would he go on, not hearing his voice again? His laugh? Just being with Harry … They could have finally been together … Beyond the war …. But Harry could leave them any moment.

'Ginny's awake, and she demanded to come, she won't lie low for a bit,' said Ron softly.

Harry deserved to see Ginny, who had given him a chance to live. Draco nodded, unable to speak. And moments later, the curtain moved again, and in came a stumbling, weak looking Ginny who could barely walk as she sat by Draco, trying to smile at Ron and Hermione.

'How is he?' asked Ginny, as though demanding the truth.

'He's really weak,' said Draco, trying his hardest to talk, he owed it to Ginny. 'He may not …'

'Draco, I'm sorry … I could have saved him but I passed out … I was so weak,' said Ginny, crying now, too.

'You were amazing, Ginny,' said Draco quietly. 'Call in the mediwizard, Weasley, _please_.'

He was looking at Ron, who nodded to him and brought in the mediwizard immediately.

The mediwizard looked at Draco. 'What shall you all decide to do?' he asked, quite sympathetically … It was Harry Potter after all.

'Give him the potion to allow him to wake … So we can say goodbye,' said Draco. 'And then give him the strongest potion you can give so he can die numb of the pain …. And … And … _in peace_.'

Draco Malfoy had never been so depressed but he had been through so much in his sixteen years of life. Draco couldn't sit in denial … Harry wasn't going to make it, most likely, he knew it, he could feel it. Harry would want them to say goodbye to him …

Hermione and Ginny cried harder than ever at this. It was Ron who managed to speak. 'Please …. Let my family come see him …. And Sirius and Lupin … And Dumbledore … And the others.'

Because of the procedures, Harry was taken to a large room instead of the small resting room from before. The mediwizard left them with Harry as he left to get the potions. Everyone else was on their way … Draco must be strong …

The mediwizard returned quickly. He came to lift Harry's head, but Draco did it, and with difficulty the mediwizard poured the potion into Harry's mouth and slowly Draco lowered Harry's head. Ron put one finger on Harry's forehead, feeling his body heat, obviously unsure. Ginny began touching his hair … The damn messy hair Harry always had … And Hermione touched his left shoulder …

And Harry's eyes slowly opened, revealing the beautiful green eyes. And then the mediwizard gave Harry the potion to relieve the pain as Harry gasped in pain.

* * *

Harry's body felt numb but he was somehow alert as he looked up at his friends who looked awful. Why were they so upset? There was no pain … He was going to be fine, he was sure. He idly wondered how long he had been in bed …

Harry tried to speak, but then realized how much effort it took. He wasn't strong at all. He felt weaker than ever … Trying to move at all took awful effort. 'How long have I been here?' Harry croaked.

'Three days,' muttered Hermione breathlessly. 'Harry …You….Were wonderful. Thank you!'

Hermione couldn't speak as she sobbed into Ron's chest.

'She's right, mate. Harry, you've always been so brave,' said Ron, trying not to cry unsuccessfully.

Harry looked at Draco. 'Why are you all so sad? I'm weak, but the pain isn't so bad … I'll recover,' said Harry. 'What's going on?'

'Harry, it's just … It's just,' tried Hermione.

'No, _the truth_,' said Ginny, stronger than ever. 'Harry … Bellatrix … She cursed you horribly … There's a … a poison … You're in critical condition … We used a potion to awake you … We had to see you.'

Harry's face turned to pure horror as he began crying. He realized it was true now … He was going to die. And even in that moment he felt himself drifting out … _No, not yet_.

'I love you all,' said Harry, trying so hard. 'Draco, you will always be my first and only lover … And Ron and Hermione, the best friends I could have had … And Ginny, so brave and loyal, you're so strong …'

'She saved you, Harry,' said Draco, though Ginny looked a though she wanted to be modest. 'Ginny used sympathetic magic to heal the wounds, but it didn't totally … Bellatrix was so …'

'Where is she? Bellatrix, I mean,' said Harry in a small voice. He had to know before he died.

'I killed her,' whispered Draco. 'I made her _suffer_.'

Harry nodded. And at this moment, people began coming into the room in groups. It was Dumbledore, McGonagall, Lupin, Sirius, Dean Thomas, the rest of the Weasley family …Aurors Harry recognized … And then … The Dursleys, even, looking if possible, sympathetic.

Draco and Ginny grabbed his left hand, and Hermione and Ron the right as everyone watched him, teary-eyed not speaking.

'You can rest now, Harry. We're all here.' said Draco, and Harry managed to see the tears flooding down Draco's cheeks as Harry slowly drifted out. He didn't want to go to sleep … But he was tired … He could fall into a blissful sleep if only for a moment … Surely he had _some_ time left ….

And he thought he saw Jill … But Jill was dead, Harry knew this. But he thought he saw her, yet somehow she didn't look solid … But not like a ghost either … She looked healthy … young … She was smiling at him …. And then he saw the two people he had thought more about than anyone else when he killed Voldemort …. His parents, young as ever, smiling at him, and all three of them motioned for him to come … But how could he? He was hurt …. Could anyone else see them?

He felt his mind drift out … To somewhere … But he thought he saw a glimmer of a bright light.

* * *

_And I saw the white light as I was somehow lifted from my body …. I felt no weakness, no pain, no sorrow …. I smiled at my friends as I knew they'd be okay … And we would be together in the future …. And my eyes drifted toward my parents who I cherished at that moment more than I ever had in my life … And Jill smiled at my mother and then to me …_

_And I was driven toward the white light, feeling the greatest love at the light … I must approach it … Complete serenity greets me. And as I came to the white light it grew larger and I was pulled into it … And I traveled through the tunnel to another world … And then the recollection of the eternal life I have had before and after this life returned to me … And I know I have done my duties in this life … . And I shut my eyes and open them to the beauty and perfection of the Other Side._

**R.I.P**

**Harry James Potter**

**1980-1996**

_Nos totus intereo unus_

* * *

**Final Words from the Author:** ...And that's a wrap. Thank you!

So it's all over. I started this in January 2006 ... Sometimes I updated frequently sometimes I went months ... But I finished it, and here it is. I hope the readers have truly enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it.

To answer some questions that quote at the end is the same Latin quote Draco had told Harry once ... "We all die alone." Foreshadowing? Maybe... After this is all over, the Ministry gives Ron and Hermione jobs at the Ministry immediately after they finish school. Ginny and Draco's reward is massive and they leave school, feeling it was unneeded now and behind them after all they had survived and they live in the Muggle world for sometime to get away from it all. Ginny and Draco aren't lovers, but they sleep in the same bed and they hold each other but it is totally platonic, just a very strong bond. Harry always watches over them and sometimes in their dreams he visits them ... Offering the reassurance of his love for them and his happiness, wherever he may be.

Dumbledore dies shortly after Harry of old age, the battles fought serving the headmaster deadly; in the aftermath of the Second War Dumbledore weakens farther and farther from health until the poisonous afterglow of it all interminably agitates the already quite elderly wizard. He is buried in Godric's Hollow, where he (without incidence to Deathly Hallows, notably) grew up. Did anyone catch the symbolism of Ginny and Draco holding Harry's left hand and Ron and Hermione his right?


	24. EPILOGUE: Ten Years Later

**Author's prelude**: It was a very touchy message that I received from a big fan of _Boys on the Radio_ which compelled me, so politely and so humbly at that, to write some sort of epilogue to the story. I hope that he and all my readers find some closure in this candid, 'one-take shot' (so to speak) at some kind of epilogue despite several years' gap:

* * *

Ten Years Later...

_I can't be near you, _

_The light just radiates__._

Draco Malfoy, age 26, looks out at the mirage of London through the window of his Ministry office. Though of course he knows the picturesque image of Downtown London isn't real, Draco grins at its innocence, at the simplicity of the whole thing. When he'd first been employed as an Auror by the Minister of Magic herself, he'd gotten to pick what image would be imposed "out his window", and after long thought he'd decided on the square in London where Harry had dressed him up in Muggle clothing for the very first time. Gazing at the imaginary couples walking busily along the fanciful London street, Draco, caught up in the distraction of this idle, seemingly meaningless moment, indeed cannot help but think of Harry. _Harry._ The wonder boy who still had the pieces of his broken heart irretrievably concealed. Harry Potter, the boy-who-lived, the legendary vanquisher of Lord Voldemort. Harry Potter - the very boy who had saved him from a terrible fate, who made a man, a hero even, out of Draco. The boy who he'd taunted and rivaled callously for so many years...

Oh, and the boy who by some unstoppable force came to be his one true love, too.

Yes, the chilling fact that Harry was long gone, murdered ten years ago now as a matter of fact, in turn murdered Draco inside even still. No matter how many years went by, the insufferable pain of losing Harry remained a fresh, agonizing wound, profusely bleeding freely over Draco's goosebump-filled skin. Time was of no virtual concept to Draco in his mourning. The moment of Harry's death was a memory that played back, ever-vivid and ever-sharp, in his brain on the constant. It'd kept him all these years feeling on the brink of death, death from heartbreak, juvenile or frivolous as that may sound. There was simply no erasing the face of the beautiful boy, young man rather, whose charisma, bravery, passion, integrity and, most of all (though also most forgettable, ironically), _suffering_ saved not only Draco but the entire wizarding world from the unending terror of a seemingly indefeasible Lord Voldemort...

Before Draco had been irresistibly enchanted by Harry's spell, he had been but a brutish, smug Slytherin who boasted about his own pure-blood ancestry and advocated the "greatness" of the Dark Lord and his mission to exterminate "undesirables" such as Mudbloods or half-breeds. He'd been a bully whose greatest pride was a whole family tree starting with his father glorious in foremost an association with the Dark Arts and its practice. When he and Harry were first brought together by that fate-writing radio show the summer before their fifth Hogwarts year, it was the start of Draco's transformation. Through all their sequential adventures and misadventures and world-saving missions Draco learned to accept the fact of evil that his family was and actually redact it out of himself rather than embrace it. He learned the key to survival and personal advancement as a person was not to hide from the past and its painful baggage, but rather to acknowledge it, bear it, and learn to overcome it...

Most of all, Draco Malfoy learned from that legend Harry Potter - who happened to also double as his most unpredictably long-destined, single-handed soul-mate, too, somewhat notably - to be the persevering victor, not _victim_, of one's own self, flaws and all. Draco obviously would not be the noble person he was today had it not been for Harry, would not, to be even more specific, be seated here right now in his office at the Ministry of Magic peering at the mirage of London through his window. This haunting, unarguable fact had been a heart-wrenching reminder sealed in his conscious mind for an indefinitely delayed length of time, an ever-present round of torture...

_And yet__._

Spontaneously, Draco blinked out of his disconcerted state as a sudden, shocking brightened epiphany encompassed his complete attention, making him wonder to himself, '_What the ruddy hell would Harry say about me allowing this strife, the pain of all my moping and depression, overtake my entire life?! I bloody reckon he'd be _EMBARRASSED_ of me for it! I've been letting myself sink deeper and deeper into a soul-sucking hole of empty hopelessness__!_'

"..._Enough_!" Draco at last let out with a miraculous amount of enthusiasm and determination at his oyster. Each moment passing he was amazingly beginning to feel more and more inspired, more and more driven, more and more set on a now somehow realistic-seeming goal of no longer only day-by-day bare survival, but instead genuinely true, extraordinary _recovery _-

And it was all for Harry. If nothing else, Draco knew for sure that it was what Harry would want for him.

* * *

**Author's Final Note: **Lyrics, in suit by Courtney Love of course, come from Hole's "Malibu" (which yes, was excerpted for use in certain select chapters).


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